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  • The Classes of College Students

    OK, the University is back in session, and the swarms have once again invaded my home town, so I figured I would post about the many annoying types of college students I have to deal with.

    Mr. (or Ms.) Oblivious

    Just walks out in front of Traffic, in a non-chalant manner.

    Beer Crazy

    Sub-division of Mr. Oblivious, with the goal of getting to a local bar.

    Dark Knight

    A Mr. Oblivious in DARK clothing at night. Borderline suicidal.

    Mr. Obstruction

    A guy that is walking with his friends or girlfriend, along a narrow sidewalk, and rather than walking in front of or behind, walks on the street, ignoring traffic.
    At least chivalry isn't dead, because I never see a woman in the street like this.

    Mr. (or Ms.) Studious

    Rarely encountered at this late at night because they are either studying, sleeping, or working. Generally not a problem.

    Anyone else annoyed by a local Institution of Higher Learning?

    SC
    "...four of his five wits went halting off, and now is the whole man governed with one..." W. Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing Act I, Sc I

    Do you like Shakespeare? Join us The Globe Theater!

  • #2
    I'm looking forward to the first snowfall when all the idiots who've never seen snow before freak the fuck out, despite the fact that it's not even sticking. Though it was worse where I grew up, combine two colleges (one Ivy League) with very steep hills and lots of snow, and you get moron drivers.
    The High Priest is an Illusion!

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    • #3
      Quoth ArcticChicken View Post
      Though it was worse where I grew up, combine two colleges (one Ivy League) with very steep hills and lots of snow, and you get moron drivers.
      Thanks, now I'm totally looking forward to our mid-winter move to Ithaca (which has two colleges, one of them Ivy League, though I don't know if this is where you grew up). I'm fine with snow, and Hubby has learned, but even here in CT there are...issues.
      "Enough expository banter. It's time we fight like men. And ladies. And ladies who dress like men. For Gilgamesh...IT'S MORPHING TIME!"
      - Gilgamesh, Final Fantasy V

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      • #4
        Quoth Kogarashi View Post
        Thanks, now I'm totally looking forward to our mid-winter move to Ithaca (which has two colleges, one of them Ivy League, though I don't know if this is where you grew up).
        The best swimming is at Treman, and the best coffee is at Gimmee!
        The High Priest is an Illusion!

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        • #5
          Quoth ArcticChicken View Post
          The best swimming is at Treman, and the best coffee is at Gimmee!
          Ooh, thanks for the swimming recommendation. We don't drink coffee, so the coffee recommendation isn't as helpful, but still appreciated.
          "Enough expository banter. It's time we fight like men. And ladies. And ladies who dress like men. For Gilgamesh...IT'S MORPHING TIME!"
          - Gilgamesh, Final Fantasy V

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          • #6
            The speed racer - Either has a really nice car that was bought by the parents/borrowing daddy's midlife crisis or an old rusted out car that is held together by duct tape and a prayer. Most highway traffic here averages 5 to 10 km/h over the 90km/h posted limit. The speed racer only goes that slow when traffic is in the way. Stop signs, red lights, double yellow lines, oncoming traffic, etc are all suggestions at best.

            Encountered each morning on my drive to work and the drive home at the end of the day. I work in the community where the community college main campus is located, and live in the same community where many of the college kids live/party.

            One school year, I was averaging once a week of either almost being run off the road by an illegal lane change (single lane each way for the highways, except for some passing zones) cutting me off (same direction, trying to sideswipe me into the ditch after I've slowed down to nearly 30-35 km/h (on a 90km/h highway) while watching the pull out to pass in my mirrors, on a double yellow line with oncoming traffic) or someone doing an illegal lane change from the opposite direction and nearly colliding with me head on as I'd come around a corner.
            That year, there was about a two week stretch where this happened once, or even twice, a day.

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            • #7
              We run across the Dark Knight on bicycles fairly regularly (how is it the driver's fault if these idiots don't want to be seen?). We haven't spotted the Drunk subspecies yet, but it's probably just a matter of time.

              There's a phenomenon around here we call The Amoeba: Not limited to college students though, although that variety is more obnoxious. There will be a herd of about 20 of them jaywalking as slow as a human can walk and still be considered mobile, all with cell phones or ipods in their ears. I once saw an Amoeba cross the road seconds in front of an active fire truck (how do you NOT notice that coming?!)...legally the driver had to slam on the brakes but nobody was happy.

              I was walking home yesterday and see a car coming up the road with a mattress, bookcase and Swiffer on the roof. The mattress was actually tied down; the other two items were not. The Swiffer came flying off the car and almost hit me (the driver saw this, actually stopped and was quite apologetic). He stows it in the car and takes off again...right before I lose sight of him I see the bookcase starting to wobble.
              Last edited by Dreamstalker; 09-02-2011, 01:26 PM.
              "I am quite confident that I do exist."
              "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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              • #8
                Quoth Dreamstalker View Post
                We run across the Dark Knight on bicycles fairly regularly (how is it the driver's fault if these idiots don't want to be seen?). We haven't spotted the Drunk subspecies yet, but it's probably just a matter of time.

                There's a phenomenon around here we call The Amoeba: Not limited to college students though, although that variety is more obnoxious.
                I've seen the Amoeba. Tonight. Around here it is ALWAYS college students. And it's almost always when the light says "Don't Walk".

                Stan N. Stare

                One who stands on the edge of a crowd, in the middle of the street, and just watches as you drive by (forced in to the wrong lane) like you are a problem for him.

                SC
                "...four of his five wits went halting off, and now is the whole man governed with one..." W. Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing Act I, Sc I

                Do you like Shakespeare? Join us The Globe Theater!

                Comment


                • #9
                  RocketBike

                  This guy (rarely a girl) never stops at a red light, never looks both ways before crossing the intersection against said light, and can be found on the sidewalk just as often as the road itself. He just darts out in the way of oncoming traffic, and it's only a miracle that he hasn't become road pizza yet.

                  "Enough expository banter. It's time we fight like men. And ladies. And ladies who dress like men. For Gilgamesh...IT'S MORPHING TIME!"
                  - Gilgamesh, Final Fantasy V

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                  • #10
                    I went to an institution of higher learning wherein we annoyed all the townies...I would have been Ms. Studious, but just our presence annoyed them anyway.
                    I don't go in for ancient wisdom
                    I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
                    It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

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                    • #11
                      Mr/Mrs Unprepared for the city
                      This I blame just as much on the parents as the students, but those students who prior to going to college have never been in a town of more than 50,000, and now have no clue how to handle a city, they can't read bus/train schedules, they don't know how to handle more complex intersections, and freak out in crowds.

                      Mr/Mrs jumbo backpack
                      I can fit my backpack and laptop either on my lap or under my seat, and I do so. There is nothing more irritating than seeing the student with the backpack taking up a second seat on a bus that is standing room only.
                      If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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                      • #12
                        Quoth smileyeagle1021 View Post
                        Mr/Mrs Unprepared for the city
                        Then there is the opposite Mr. (or Ms.) New in Town
                        Never been out of the decent sized city, and can't understand why everything is closed by 12am.

                        SC
                        "...four of his five wits went halting off, and now is the whole man governed with one..." W. Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing Act I, Sc I

                        Do you like Shakespeare? Join us The Globe Theater!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          The Weaver/Sir Expandable-by-Chaos
                          This type somehow manages to be in your way on a sidewalk wide enough for two trucks (maintenance access, don'tchyaknow)-- and stays in your way, after you maneuver to to around and speed up. Far more baffling than those encountered in cars. Usually goes on until you've reached your destination. God protect us from the ones you have in a cramped lecture hall.
                          Douchebag Parker
                          Huge car. Tiny spots. Nearest parking over a mile away. No tickets given. :| No exaggeration.
                          "Is it the lie that keeps you sane? Is this the lie that keeps you sane?What is it?Can it be?Ought it to exist?"
                          "...and may it be that I cleave to the ugly truth, rather than the beautiful lie..."

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