GOLDS!!! ARGHABLATHKA!!!

[Gaki]

I'm sure I have plenty saved up but this one was the one that got most people in the store's attention so here it is. Keep in mind that "lights" are now considered "Golds" in many brands.

SC: I want USA Gold (That's the brand name) Menthol Light One Hundreds.
Me: *turns around and grabs the Menthol Light 100s.*
SC: NO!

At this point everyone in the store turns around and looks and the guy behind him has his jaw to the floor.

SC: GOLDS.
Me: ... Uh? The brand name is Golds....?
SC: GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS.
Me: These ARE the lights. The MENTHOL GOLDS.
SC: GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS.
Me: *grabs the Lights 100s NON MENTHOL.* You want the ones that AREN'T MENTHOL?
SC: YEAH. THATS WHAT I WANT.
Me: ......what the....fff...?


After that the guy behind him was like, "Holy shit that guy was serious about those Golds. And he DID say menthol. I HEARD it." And of course even the deli people could hear him screaming so they had to ask me what his problem was. Jesus. If you made a mistake in asking me for cigs just OWN UP to it. REALLY. It's NOT A BIG DEAL.

[Shalom]

SC: GOLDS.
Me: ... Uh? The brand name is Golds....?
SC: GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS.
Me: These ARE the lights. The MENTHOL GOLDS.
SC: GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS. GOLDS.

#1 on the Ankh-Morpork Hit Parade (Dwarf Music chart)...

[Dave1982]

Ugh...kinda reminds me of an SC I witnessed at my first job at the supermarket.

SC: Marlboro Lights, two.

CW: Two packs or two cartons?

SC: MARLBORO LIGHTS!!!!!! TWO!!!!

CW got her two packs and that - thankfully - was what she wanted.

[AmbrosiaWriter]

Geez. I'm lucky I guess. Not all brands use "Gold" as their way of saying "Light" there are brands that use "blues" or another color.

When someone asks for the other brand and says "Lights" and I haven't memorized it yet, they're always nice enough to go, "Oh, the blue box." Many times they'll even help by pointing toward the wall when I'm just not able to spot them (we have a huge cigarette wall so sometimes if the brand has only a small spot I can't always spot it.)

That guy was a douche-muffin with extra nutter butter.

[dalesys]

#1 on the Ankh-Morpork Hit Parade (Dwarf Music chart)...

AKA The Short List of Music With Rocks in It.

[Jay 2K Winger]

Oy, we had someone like that used to shop at the wholesale club.

She was this little old lady with a faint, quiet voice. She'd always ask for "Benson & Hedges in the green box." Mind you, there were three different kinds of green. There was the dark green (regular B&H Menthols), regular green (B&H Methol Light) and light green (B&H Ultra Light).

And every time I dealt with her, I somehow got it wrong. I'd get her the regulars, no, she wanted the lights. Next time, I get her the lights, no she wants the regulars. The time after that, I get the regulars, no she wants the ultra lights.

She never started going "GREEN. GREEN. GREEN. GREEN." but it was irritating as hell that she always kicked up a fuss about it.

[fireheart]

Geez. I'm lucky I guess. Not all brands use "Gold" as their way of saying "Light" there are brands that use "blues" or another color.

This.

And for menthols, it's often green. For menthol lights it's often a lighter green.

At my previous place of employment, the system for most brands (not all of them) went something like this (from strongest to weakest):

Red
Blue
Gold
Silver
White
Green (menthols, not necessarily weakest mind you)

A few brands would have variations in that lineup such as Winfield, which threw in Sky Blue and Pall Mall, which had a completely different colour system.

Alpines (which are ALL menthol) went something like Filter, Original, Rich, Smooth, Fine and Supreme (from strongest to weakest).

Longbeach went something like Filter, Original, Rich, Menthol, Smooth, Fine, Finesse, Menthol Fresh and Select (in order from strongest to weakest). (their colours also were VERY different)

Luckily the changeover occurred well before I started working the smoke counter, but before that I can imagine the amount of bitching it caused.

I had maybe 1 or 2 customers ask me for 8mg or 4mg cigarettes at which point I'd open up the flap on the row where their ciggies were located and ask them which one it was. (australian law prohibits cigarettes from being openly displayed now, but prior to that you had the option of either covering them up or displaying several cigarette warning posters, the company I worked for went with covering them up.)

[pzychobitch]

I thought people that asked for Capris and Misty's were bad.... This one takes the cake. Sorry you had to deal with that.

[VenomX]

I love the ones that want USA Gold. I ask which and they say GOLD!
So I grab the USA Gold in the gold/yellow box. They yell NO! the red box!
I tell them next time to say USA Gold reds or they get what I grab and like it or they can go somewhere else.

Then theres the ones that come in and say they need smokes. Then get mad when you ask what kind.. lol
Most of the time it's someone wanting Newports. They act like EVERYONE smokes that brand... sorry but no.

[PepperElf]

say they need smokes.

Hell you could hand them a bag of tobacco and some rolling paper then.

Hey they did say smokes - never said what kind.

[blas]

Damn, people are still playing "The Game"?

Seriously? Really?

When I need smokes, I need them now. I don't have time to rev up a poor store clerk with passive aggressive mind games.

I used to get real big headaches from customers who'd walk in, blurt "Marbosinabox", so I'd grab Marlboro reds, they'd shriek "No, LIGHTS I said!" and I'd grab lights, and they'd bark "NO I want 100s!"

[Jay 2K Winger]

Damn, people are still playing "The Game"?

Dammit. I just lost. So have all the rest of you.

[Kheldarson]

I still love the one customer I got who asked for "cowboy killers in a box" and then got mad that I didn't understand him.

Geez, I dunno, maybe assume the girl at Wal-Mart may not be a smoker and just ask in a normal way?

Oh wait...I'm on CS....

[VenomX]

Cancer sticks...... is another name I have been asked for lol...

[Jay 2K Winger]

Cancer sticks...... is another name I have been asked for lol...

"You want to buy some death sticks?"