The Last Two Stories

[Mango]

I recently quit my job and just ran across a few stories that I hadn't posted here. This is much shorter than my usual, but maybe it will make someone smile.


That was random.

SC: [wanders in]
SC: "Beware of chickens and milk!"
SC: [wanders back out again]

Well, that was...non sequitur.



I have no words.

Me: "Hello, [Company name] Medical Techology."
SC: "Do you have any information or magazines about breeding pigeons and racing pigeons?"

...


__________________
Underneath the Tree

[Kaibutsu]

"Ooh! NAVY SEALS!"
-Clerks

Those really the the ones that always stick with you.

[sms001]

"What's the frequency Kenneth?"

[EvilEmpryss]

That was random.

SC: [wanders in]
SC: "Beware of chickens and milk!"
SC: [wanders back out again]

Must... resist... doing... this... tomorrow...........

[ThanosIsKing]

*wanders in*
Pardon me, I have nothing to say!
*wanders out*

[Caractacus_Potts]

SC: [wanders in]
SC: "Beware of chickens and milk!"
SC: [wanders back out again]

I think I can explain this one for you.

The cows were surrounded, they waited and prayed
They mooed their last moos,
They chewed their last hay
Cows out-gunned

The order was given, turn cows to Whoppers
Enforced by the might of ten thousand coppers
But on the horizon, surrounding the shoppers
Came the deafening roar, of chickens, in choppers!

We will fight for bovine freedom
And hold our large heads high
We will run free with the buffalo, or die
Cows with guns

For more information follow this link: http://youtu.be/FQMbXvn2RNI

[Mango]

I've not heard that for years - thanks for the reminder.

Coincidentally I was once on the crew for one of Dana's performances.

[Argabarga]

I think it's that guns and butter equation.

You know, the classic economic thought experiment? An economy with two or more outputs, say guns and butter, will, through the need to allocate labor/resources/time have to produce less of one commodity (the guns) if it wants to produce more of another (the butter)

And therein lies the nightmare scenario this woman was worried about.

What if the economy has gone full guns? To the point that even the dairy industry is producing armaments and the cow have rifles?

[wolfie]

What if the economy has gone full guns? To the point that even the dairy industry is producing armaments and the cow have rifles?

Cows wouldn't have rifles - they'd have shotguns. After all, a shotgun is a sMOOthbore. There'd be a problem with ammunition, however - a dairy almost certainly would have far fewer BULLets than cows.

[dalesys]

Cows wouldn't have rifles - they'd have shotguns. After all, a shotgun is a sMOOthbore. There'd be a problem with ammunition, however - a dairy almost certainly would have far fewer BULLets than cows.

That's what the chickens are for... we'll shoot pullets. Rubber ones for riot control.

[sms001]

Rubber ones for riot control.

Rubber chickens are a riot.
If you like fowl jokes.
Only way to really calm them is with grass-fed MOOrtars. Disperses a crowd in a hurry.

[dalesys]

...I'm a big kid, I won't cry, but LORD! I'm glad that cows don't fly...

Were they shot from a bullista?