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"I Can Read!"
Older lady came in wanting to book a flight online. She really was a sweet person--much better than a good number of elderly people I deal with. The problem was, my lab was full with a line going out the door. Whoopee. So, I see if one of our Word computers outside the lab is available. Enter Mr Grumpy Gills (as always, fresh cookies for the movie reference). Last week, the computer he was using kept shutting down unexpectedly. It happens. Someone probably downloaded some malware through Limewire. But instead of being mildly annoyed, he was PISSED. At me, the poor lab assistant who could only beg for mercy from the Microsoft demons, and for some reason they were displeased.
Anywho, I see him heading for one of the Word computers and thinking it's the last one, I ask him if he needs it for Word processing. Those computers are connected to the Internet for job/school/business uses, but usually we're kicking people off for using MySpace/Facebook. His answer:
"YES. That's what the tag says. I can read."
Eureka! Glad to see SOMEONE around here can. Even if you really need an attitude adjustment, which I'd be happy to provide with a rusty spork. A simple, polite "yes" would have sufficed, but congratulations on your literacy.
Luckily, there was another computer open, and I was able to get Sweet Old Lady squared away.
Reading Comprehension Fail
So, Sucky Job Seeker is back. Last time she was here, she handed me her cell phone to talk to two different HR reps for instructions on getting to/filling out the online job application. She is one who knows enough about computers to be dangerous. One of her job postings sent a rejection response because 1) she did not fill out all relevent parts of the app, and 2) did not include a resume. The e-mail stated that particular opening was closed, and advised she go back to the website for further opportunities. I was able to gleen the above information from a quick glance at the e-mail message.
What is Sucky Job Seeker to do? If you guessed follow the instructions, I've got beach front property in Kansas to sell you. She decides to reply to the e-mail to ask what other jobs are available. Fine. So I walk her through how to reply to an e-mail. Click "Reply," type message in the big box, click "Send." Somehow this was confusing.
Ok. E-mail is sent. Then comes "So that had my resume, right?" D'oh! Somebody failed to mention she wanted to send an e-mail with a copy of her resume attached. Let's review. The job she applied for is no longer available. She also failed to follow instructions on the original app. But who am I to tell people they really are stupid and should spontaneously combust, thus removing themselves from the gene pool, right? She also has one of those newfangled stick things she doesn't know how to use. It was in the wrong port, so the computer didn't recongize it, causing much growling and grumbling from me. I'm beyond annoyed at this point as this is my THIRD time dealing with Sucky Job Seeker, but I show her which buttons to click to attach the resume file.
SJS: How do I pull it up to make sure it's the right one?
Me: (
) You have to open the file in Word.
SJS: *vacant stare*
Me: ( ) Cancel that [file attachment] box. Minimize your e-mail window. No, not that button! Yes, that button. Now open Word.
SJS: *goes to click on the Publisher icon*
Me: Does that look like "Word" to you? No, click on the big blue W. *she clicks* Twice. *she clicks again, gets the rename function* No, click out on the desktop somewhere. Now click twice REALLY FAST. *finally succeedes in opening Word*
SJS: Now what?
Me: Go to Open. *pause for her to make a feeble attempt at locating the magic button* Use either the folder icon or go under File.
SJS: *mouse goes to Save icon* This one?
Me: *brain to mouth filter fail* Does it say Open?
SJS: Oh. *clicks the right one*
Me: Now, find your flash drive.
SJS: *stare*
Me: Click in the top box and tell the computer to look in your flash drive.
SJS: This one?
Me: Yes! Now, open the file you want.
SJS: *clicks a file, once, stares*
Me: Twice
SJS: *clicks again, gets the rename function*
Me: No, click in the white. Now click twice REALLY FAST! (yes, we went through this twice)
SJS: *does so* This one's ok, I guess.
Me: Super! Alright, go back to your e-mail window...*rinse, lather, repeat on attaching the stupid file to her stupid e-mail*
Thought all was quiet until she wanted to take out that newfangled stick thing. Had to walk her through that too.
I'm thinking she's not getting a job anytime soon.
Meetings
Dear B,
I know keeping track of a hectic schedule such as yours is tough. That's why I stopped by your office before we even opened. If you tell me to come back at 10:15, FRAKKING BE THERE AT 10:15!! I can forgive a few minutes late; I understand sometimes other meetings run late, and time gets away from us, but do NOT leave me standing outside your office being stared down by creepy people for half an hour before I give up and go back to work. Almost two hours later, still no word on actually meeting with you. I think I'll be "busy" the rest of the day.
Sincerely,
Jedi
Older lady came in wanting to book a flight online. She really was a sweet person--much better than a good number of elderly people I deal with. The problem was, my lab was full with a line going out the door. Whoopee. So, I see if one of our Word computers outside the lab is available. Enter Mr Grumpy Gills (as always, fresh cookies for the movie reference). Last week, the computer he was using kept shutting down unexpectedly. It happens. Someone probably downloaded some malware through Limewire. But instead of being mildly annoyed, he was PISSED. At me, the poor lab assistant who could only beg for mercy from the Microsoft demons, and for some reason they were displeased.
Anywho, I see him heading for one of the Word computers and thinking it's the last one, I ask him if he needs it for Word processing. Those computers are connected to the Internet for job/school/business uses, but usually we're kicking people off for using MySpace/Facebook. His answer:
"YES. That's what the tag says. I can read."
Eureka! Glad to see SOMEONE around here can. Even if you really need an attitude adjustment, which I'd be happy to provide with a rusty spork. A simple, polite "yes" would have sufficed, but congratulations on your literacy.
Luckily, there was another computer open, and I was able to get Sweet Old Lady squared away.
Reading Comprehension Fail
So, Sucky Job Seeker is back. Last time she was here, she handed me her cell phone to talk to two different HR reps for instructions on getting to/filling out the online job application. She is one who knows enough about computers to be dangerous. One of her job postings sent a rejection response because 1) she did not fill out all relevent parts of the app, and 2) did not include a resume. The e-mail stated that particular opening was closed, and advised she go back to the website for further opportunities. I was able to gleen the above information from a quick glance at the e-mail message.
What is Sucky Job Seeker to do? If you guessed follow the instructions, I've got beach front property in Kansas to sell you. She decides to reply to the e-mail to ask what other jobs are available. Fine. So I walk her through how to reply to an e-mail. Click "Reply," type message in the big box, click "Send." Somehow this was confusing.
Ok. E-mail is sent. Then comes "So that had my resume, right?" D'oh! Somebody failed to mention she wanted to send an e-mail with a copy of her resume attached. Let's review. The job she applied for is no longer available. She also failed to follow instructions on the original app. But who am I to tell people they really are stupid and should spontaneously combust, thus removing themselves from the gene pool, right? She also has one of those newfangled stick things she doesn't know how to use. It was in the wrong port, so the computer didn't recongize it, causing much growling and grumbling from me. I'm beyond annoyed at this point as this is my THIRD time dealing with Sucky Job Seeker, but I show her which buttons to click to attach the resume file.
SJS: How do I pull it up to make sure it's the right one?
Me: (
) You have to open the file in Word.SJS: *vacant stare*
Me: (
) Cancel that [file attachment] box. Minimize your e-mail window. No, not that button! Yes, that button. Now open Word.SJS: *goes to click on the Publisher icon*
Me: Does that look like "Word" to you? No, click on the big blue W. *she clicks* Twice. *she clicks again, gets the rename function* No, click out on the desktop somewhere. Now click twice REALLY FAST. *finally succeedes in opening Word*
SJS: Now what?
Me: Go to Open. *pause for her to make a feeble attempt at locating the magic button* Use either the folder icon or go under File.
SJS: *mouse goes to Save icon* This one?
Me: *brain to mouth filter fail* Does it say Open?
SJS: Oh. *clicks the right one*
Me: Now, find your flash drive.
SJS: *stare*
Me: Click in the top box and tell the computer to look in your flash drive.
SJS: This one?
Me: Yes! Now, open the file you want.
SJS: *clicks a file, once, stares*
Me: Twice
SJS: *clicks again, gets the rename function*
Me: No, click in the white. Now click twice REALLY FAST! (yes, we went through this twice)
SJS: *does so* This one's ok, I guess.
Me: Super! Alright, go back to your e-mail window...*rinse, lather, repeat on attaching the stupid file to her stupid e-mail*
Thought all was quiet until she wanted to take out that newfangled stick thing. Had to walk her through that too.
I'm thinking she's not getting a job anytime soon.
Meetings
Dear B,
I know keeping track of a hectic schedule such as yours is tough. That's why I stopped by your office before we even opened. If you tell me to come back at 10:15, FRAKKING BE THERE AT 10:15!! I can forgive a few minutes late; I understand sometimes other meetings run late, and time gets away from us, but do NOT leave me standing outside your office being stared down by creepy people for half an hour before I give up and go back to work. Almost two hours later, still no word on actually meeting with you. I think I'll be "busy" the rest of the day.
Sincerely,
Jedi
is that the concept of a right-click is too far advanced for it to be successful.
)
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