I can FEEL my IQ dropping......

[Captain Trips]

Me: "Thank you for calling Technical Support, this is Trips speaking, may I have your name and centre number" Them: "Uh, is this Technical Support?" (Note: before they get to me, they get a phone menu with the option "Press 1 for Technical Support" and they've pressed "1" already.)

Worse -- I get this at least once a day.

Even worse -- at least once a day, once I confirm that it is indeed Tech Support, they come up with, "Well, I don't even know if I've reached the right department. You see, my computer's not working."

Is it any wonder when I get home I feel like going straight to bed? At 3 in the afternoon?

[worddork]

I worked at a bookstore and every so often we would have morons come in and ask if we sold books. I would sometimes aswer "No, all the books on the shelves are just for show." but most times a co-worker would cover my mouth and tell them yes. (I was able to be snarky because we were a temporary store and were closing in a month. I loved knowing they couldn't fire me because they needed all the people they could get to pack up the store so said whatever I wanted without fear.)

[BookstoreEscapee]

Do you work here?

Whilst said in full uniform with company name on front, rear and on (much to my suprise) my trousers.

While standing inside the info desk and once while standing behind the cashwrap.

I worked at a bookstore and every so often we would have morons come in and ask if we sold books. I would sometimes aswer "No, all the books on the shelves are just for show." but most times a co-worker would cover my mouth and tell them yes. (I was able to be snarky because we were a temporary store and were closing in a month. I loved knowing they couldn't fire me because they needed all the people they could get to pack up the store so said whatever I wanted without fear.)

I am jealous.

I've heard people ask if they can borrow books. It's a bookstore, not a library.

Do you have a copy machine?

"No, we try to actually sell the books."

Yes, I have seen someone say this. And get away with it. No, it wasn't me. She was a cute little college girl who looked and sounded younger and was planning to be an elementary school teacher. She said it so sweetly that the customer just laughed and walked away.

[TryNotToBeThatOne]

I once walked up behind a clerk at a fabric store & asked if they sold buttonholes. Note: I used to work in a fabric store. And the clerk in question is married to one of my best friends. I was surprising her at work.

[Andara Bledin]

I had one lady thrust a loaf of bread in my face. It was the bread that is in the bag with the multi-color spots.

I like to aver that I Wonder how they can call it Bread. Seriously, the stuff is nasty. And they'd lose money if it was sold by weight, 'cause it's mostly air.

"You mean if I call Canada, that would be considered an international long distance call?"

You should see some of the disclaimers sellers on eBay put in their listings about shipping across the border. People on both sides seem to have difficulty grasping the concept that the US and Canada do not inter-operate seamlessly.

^-.-^

[Jadedcarguy]

You should see some of the disclaimers sellers on eBay put in their listings about shipping across the border. People on both sides seem to have difficulty grasping the concept that the US and Canada do not inter-operate seamlessly.

^-.-^

I sold some books on ebay. I put in the ad that it was US and Canada only, freight in the lower 48 was a fixed price, with freight to Canada, AK and HI being higher, naturally. You would not believe the emails I got! People in France wanting to know why I wouldn't sell to them, people in Canada wanting to know why I was "ripping them off", on and on. I have to wonder if this is their first time out in public.

[South Texan]

"I wonder if he is the REAL Superman."

I overheard that one from a woman in her thirties watching a bunch of actor types in superhero costumes signing autographs at an amusement park last year.

She honestly did not look to be mentally challenged - and she was not speaking to a child. Further, the guy in the blue tights and red cape costume looked nothing like actors Brandon Routh, Christopher Reeve, Tom Welling or even George Reeves. In fact, he was wearing a very obvious wig and muscle padding.

[tollbaby]

Any bread that costs less than $3 a loaf is a bread product. The same way squeeze cheese is a cheese product. Tastes vaguely like bread/cheese, but so not.

What does cost have to do with it? The bakery I go to, they charge $1.50 for a loaf of organic bread, baked in a woodfire oven. Why would that not be real bread?

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Me: Hi, I'm calling to find out if I'm scheduled for an ultrasound tomorrow.
Idiot woman in my doctor's office when I was pregnant: I don't know, where you scheduled for one?
Me:
Me: Didn't I just ask you that?

I didn't really want to think the people I was depending on to take care of me and make sure everything was okay while I was pregnant were this abysmally stupid. This was not an isolated incident.

[Alpha Strike]

I've always been frustrated by the following response when I'm manning the phones:

Me: Hi, this is Paul in X department at Y Company.

SC: Is this X department and/or Y Company?

I don't know that this is the DUMBEST question I've ever had but it instantly lowers my opinion of the person on the other end of the line. Of course these are typically the same people who have run into problems because they don't follow directions, don't read what's in front of them or don't pay attention to what they're being told. And it's usually an indicator of a long, frustrating call where I have to repeat things using a mono-syllabic vocabulary and/or break down my explanations into tiny, child-size chunks that even an unborn fetus could understand.

(I will mention that I've been told often I'm very good on the phones as far as imparting information in a concise and clear manner, and my co-workers often semi-joke how loud my voice can get just in the course of a regular conversation. So I feel pretty confident in knowing I'm saying things clearly the first time around.)

[Jadedcarguy]

What does cost have to do with it? The bakery I go to, they charge $1.50 for a loaf of organic bread, baked in a woodfire oven. Why would that not be real bread?

I was referring to the supermarket. Typically the cheap bread is crap. The bread you're referring to is clearly an exception.

[Pagan]

Further, the guy in the blue tights and red cape costume looked nothing like actors Brandon Routh, Christopher Reeve, Tom Welling or even George Reeves.

How could you??!! You forgot DEAN CAIN!

What does cost have to do with it? The bakery I go to, they charge $1.50 for a loaf of organic bread, baked in a woodfire oven. Why would that not be real bread?

I was thinking the same thing.

I was referring to the supermarket. Typically the cheap bread is crap. The bread you're referring to is clearly an exception.

I wouldn't even say that. I know it might come as a surprise to some, but I've gotten some really good real bread at Wally World. Particularly the small size ciabatta loaves. They've got a lot of really good bread there that's under $3. By the way, it costs me less than $3 to make, from scratch, a loaf of bread myself. Does that mean that mine is crap, too?

Like wine, price doesn't have anything to do with whether the bread is real or good.

[Ironclad Alibi]

"I wonder if he is the REAL Superman."

I overheard that one from a woman in her thirties watching a bunch of actor types in superhero costumes signing autographs at an amusement park last year.

She honestly did not look to be mentally challenged - and she was not speaking to a child. Further, the guy in the blue tights and red cape costume looked nothing like actors Brandon Routh, Christopher Reeve, Tom Welling or even George Reeves. In fact, he was wearing a very obvious wig and muscle padding.

How could you??!! You forgot DEAN CAIN!

Not to mention Kirk Alyn, the first actor to play Superman.

[South Texan]

How could you??!! You forgot DEAN CAIN!

Not to mention Kirk Alyn, the first actor to play Superman.

Can you tell I do not keep up with Superman movies or series? I only saw the first movie with Christopher Reeve. I never saw the newest movie nor watched an episode or the Lois and Clark or Smallville series.

And the guy did not look like Cain or Alyn either.

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

When doing tech support for cell phone customers, I often ask what kind of phone they have, frequently the response I get, said usually in the "Are you stupid?" tone, is: "It's a cell phone"

*brain explodes*

I KNOW THAT YOU TWIT! Is it a Motorola, Sanyo, Samsung, Nokia, Blackberry, help me out here!