Wherein I am asked to perform a rather delicate task

[walking with scissors]

You'd think that someone who lived in Phoenix, whether born or transplanted there, would have at some point heard someone say the name Phoenix out loud.

I deal with this issue a lot. I live in Illannoys.

[crazylegs]

I'm sure the scots who live in Edinboro feel your pain as do those who in in Stratfowd Upon Avon...

[DGoddessChardonnay]

"Me: “Good evening, Gravekeeper speaking, how my I help you?”
SC: “Circumcision!”

I hope he's not looking for half off.

At least it wouldn't be as bad as 75% off.

Or worse, the knife could have slipped and cut off behind the ears

[MinimaMagistra]

Friend's dialog regarding the "Foenix" pronunciation:

"I had this one guy pronounce it 'Fetus', one time. Like, 'I'm from Phoenix,' and he says 'Okay, so Fetus, Arizona.' and I'm like, 'What? Phoenix!" Go to Hell. Douchebag."