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    Bit o' backstory: Imma web designer! I work at home so I can watch our two daughters, who are 1 and 3, while my husband works out of the home.


    The rules! ZHEY DO NOTHINK

    Client: Okay so, let's get started on the website....I want it black, with lots of color.
    Seraph: Wait...so...a colorful website?
    Client: No, silly! LOL...its easy, a black website with lots of colors!
    Seraph:


    Not THIS again!

    Prospective Client: So how much would it be for a website with a really cool flash header, and I want a chat room, autoupdating stats on the left....and oh, a forum!
    Seraph: Well, first off, I don't really do flash, but <gives estimate>
    PC: WHAAAT?! You're a ***** ripoff! I could get some Chinese dude to do it for me for $25!

    ...Wait, I think I know you.


    There's a Communication Problem Here...

    Client: So I can buy this from you for $40, right?
    Seraph: No, sorry, that is $55.
    Client: Ok, sending you the $40 right now...
    Seraph: Sure, and you won't get the files until I get the other $15
    Client: But you said it was only $40!!!!!
    Seraph: Oh, really now? Did I? Would you care to show me where?
    Client: Ok so you didn't but I was hoping if I kept saying it, you'd go for it.....
    Seraph: And what have we learned from this?
    Client: .....





    Lesson Learned. Again. Also, you just got PWNT!!!

    Seriously, folks...when a friend comes to your business, treat them like just another client. You HAVE to. Basically, I did a design for a friend, and waived the half deposit I usually accept because he said he'd pay me right after, when he got his paycheck.

    As you can guess, I got burnt. He wouldn't answer IMs, emails, phone calls...NOTHING. So...today I played a little rough. Yes, it might've been a bit below the belt....but I have bills to pay.

    I called his mother.

    Not twenty minutes later,

    Friend: "AGH I'm so soo so so sorry, please don't do that again, I get paid on Thursday, I'll send you the money then!"

    Seraph: "Okay dude, I'll get ahold of you then. Lovely chat with your mom too....and don't make me call her again. "

    Friend: "yes ma'am! Sorry ma'am! JUST DON'T CALL HER AGAIN for the love of god...."



    Consider yourself pwnt, my friend!

    ....Also I have now changed my policy to full deposits, upfront, for friends. :P
    By popular request....I am now officially the Enemy of Normalcy.

    "What is unobtainium? To Seraph, it's a normal client. :P" -- Observant Friend

  • #2
    What is it about being self-employed that people don't recognize your time as valuable?

    Even so, please keep the stories coming!
    A lion however, will only devour your corpse, whereas an SC is not sated until they have destroyed your soul. (Quote per infinitemonkies)

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    • #3
      Quoth bainsidhe View Post
      Even so, please keep the stories coming!
      Seconded!

      Comment


      • #4
        Quoth Seraph View Post
        Client: Ok so you didn't but I was hoping if I kept saying it, you'd go for it.....
        I never expected anyone to admit to that, I am shocked.

        And I love your bill collection technique.

        Comment


        • #5
          With regards to the last one. I did some work as a web designer/maintainer a few years ago. A friend of mine from high school commissioned me to put up a business website for this photo studio he was starting up. On the very first page a person sees when they come to this site is a nicely done photograph of himself. He only paid me half of what he was supposed to, and expected me to keep maintaining the site (read: uploading more pictures, etc).

          Mind you, I knew this guy from elementary school. His parents still lived down the road from me. So I walked down one day to help his mom weed her flower garden and chat. In due course of the conversation I asked her if she had any kid photos of him. She showed me this picture of him standing outside, wearing a cowboy hat and tighty whities, holding a squirt gun and the biggest missing-a-front-tooth grin ever. I sweetly asked if I could borrow the picture, just for one day.

          It took him a week to discover that I had switched the photos on the front page of his website, and about a day longer before he paid up the other half. I changed the pictures back, and warned him if he didn't pay me monthly for the maintaining services I'd put it back up and LEAVE it up until I was paid. He paid me for two more months, then decided the business wasn't profitable and took it down. (I did return the photo to his mother.)

          Comment


          • #6
            Ahahaha... loved it. I plan on being that kind of mom to my son too!
            Make a list of important things to do today.
            At the top of your list, put 'eat chocolate'
            Now, you'll get at least one thing done today

            Comment


            • #7
              I run a web design and hosting company and I have one rule for friends and neighbours...

              Send them elsewhere, they are never worth the hassle that you get at all hours.
              Robert
              Peterborough Cambridgeshire

              Comment


              • #8
                Quoth Seraph View Post
                Client: No, silly! LOL...its easy, a black website with lots of colors!
                Seraph:
                I quit...

                Quoth Seraph View Post
                PC: WHAAAT?! You're a ***** ripoff! I could get some Chinese dude to do it for me for $25!
                Ugh... I hate these guys, what makes them think that our time isn't valuable. Whenever I get one of these I tell them to fuck right off...

                Quoth Seraph View Post
                Client: Ok so you didn't but I was hoping if I kept saying it, you'd go for it.....
                By this logic if I keep saying "die" you'll eventually do it? ('cause I've got a few clients I'd like to use this on...)

                Quoth Seraph View Post
                I called his mother.
                I won't work for, or with friends. I want them to still be friends after the job is done...

                I made this mistake once and it turned into an 18 month debacle that I made exactly $1000 on, but because the client was a friend I couldn't just abandon the project. Never again.

                Bottom line, our time and expertise has value, and we shouldn't work with anyone who believes differently.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth Magpie View Post
                  I never expected anyone to admit to that, I am shocked.
                  LOL I never in a million years expected to hear it either....it was *almost* refreshing to see some honesty! Of course, that refreshing quality was tempered by...a murderous desire, hehehe.
                  By popular request....I am now officially the Enemy of Normalcy.

                  "What is unobtainium? To Seraph, it's a normal client. :P" -- Observant Friend

                  Comment

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