Tweet
Well, I knew it was coming... since signing up on CS, I've had a sucession of very good days at the grindstone. Nice customers, happy families, polite children. No Sucky Customers to speak of.
Today I had about eight. Nothing like a giftshop during school holidays to bring in the morons.
Mostly just minor irritations, to be sure, but they sure stack up on you quick. Ten minutes or so after going on shift I had:
"IT DOESN'T SAY THAT!" Woman
I'm serving another customer. Abruptly there's an unxpected shouting Indian woman to my left.
LSIW: (Holding a greenstone carving) Is this the special greenstone?
Me: Ummm. Yes, those are greenstone carvings.
LSIW: But it doesn't SAY they're greenstone!
Me: Well, they are. Those green ones are greenstone and the white ones are bone carvings.
LSIW: But it doesn't SAY they're greenstone! It just says about what they're supposed to do on the back, not that they're greenstone!
*I'm now thinking "Well, you don't have a sign reading "moron" on you, but it's pretty obvious, isn't it?"*
Me: Well... they ARE greenstone.
I finish serving my non-sucky customer to find Ms. LSIW has yanked the carving off it's cardboard backing, examined it, then dumped both on the counter and wandered off. I officially hate her.
My day continues with:
"How Does This Look?" Lady
She was an Indecisive Australian Woman who approached the counter with a dozen braclets. I perked up, thinking a big sale was in the offering. No chance. The next ten minutes was one huge, circular conversation:
IAW: (holds up braclet) How does this one look on me?
Me: Uh, very nice.
IAW: (Holds up a second, identical bracelet) What about this one?
Me: Uh.. that's nice too.
IAW: (Holds up three identical bracelets) Which of these is the best?
Me: (Internally: I'm the salesman, the consultant is on a break, lady.) Well... I'm not the one who'll be wearing it... which do YOU like?
Her husband incidentally had left her at the counter to harrass me, never offering his opinion once. And as my wife could have told the lady, I never have an opinion on clothes or jewelery anyway. The questions kept a'coming regardless. including:
"Would a young girl wear this?
Does this match my skin?
Does the black lines in the paua shell make the necklace better or worse?"
The answer to all was "I. DON'T. KNOW! You're the one buying the freakin' things! Form an opinion before I beat myself unconcious with my own pricing gun!"
I never actually said that, of course. She even thanked me quote: "for my kindness" afterwards. And left me a nice pile of braclets to re-stock on the shelves.
And finally, after a parade of 'Can I have a discount?'-ers, several 'how much will *insert store name* sell this for'-s and one money-flinger (Thanks, can I toss your goods at your head in exchange?) I got:
Mr Two-Dollars
Mr $2: How much is this? (Hands me a set of fridge magnets)
Me: Let's see it's...
Mr $2: Two dollars?
*scan*
Me: $7.90
Mr $2: Two dollars?
Me: Nope, seven-ninty.
Mr $2:....
Mr $2: (hopefully) Two dollars?
Me: No. Seven. Dollars. And ninty cents.
Mr $2: I don't want it then.
Me: Okey-dokey.
*scans uber-cheap second item Mr $2 DOES want. Accepts money, hands change to him*
Mr $2: (points to magnets) So that was seven dollars?
Me:
I was THIS close to saying 'No, two dollars" to see his reaction.
The night ended beautifully with some schmuck ripping a sale sign off a display. Then tucking it into a DIFFERENT bin, leading to five different people bringing $20 pillows to the counter expecting them to be 8 bucks.
I love my work.
Sometimes.
Today I had about eight. Nothing like a giftshop during school holidays to bring in the morons.
Mostly just minor irritations, to be sure, but they sure stack up on you quick. Ten minutes or so after going on shift I had:
"IT DOESN'T SAY THAT!" Woman
I'm serving another customer. Abruptly there's an unxpected shouting Indian woman to my left.
LSIW: (Holding a greenstone carving) Is this the special greenstone?
Me: Ummm. Yes, those are greenstone carvings.
LSIW: But it doesn't SAY they're greenstone!
Me: Well, they are. Those green ones are greenstone and the white ones are bone carvings.
LSIW: But it doesn't SAY they're greenstone! It just says about what they're supposed to do on the back, not that they're greenstone!
*I'm now thinking "Well, you don't have a sign reading "moron" on you, but it's pretty obvious, isn't it?"*
Me: Well... they ARE greenstone.
I finish serving my non-sucky customer to find Ms. LSIW has yanked the carving off it's cardboard backing, examined it, then dumped both on the counter and wandered off. I officially hate her.
My day continues with:
"How Does This Look?" Lady
She was an Indecisive Australian Woman who approached the counter with a dozen braclets. I perked up, thinking a big sale was in the offering. No chance. The next ten minutes was one huge, circular conversation:
IAW: (holds up braclet) How does this one look on me?
Me: Uh, very nice.
IAW: (Holds up a second, identical bracelet) What about this one?
Me: Uh.. that's nice too.
IAW: (Holds up three identical bracelets) Which of these is the best?
Me: (Internally: I'm the salesman, the consultant is on a break, lady.) Well... I'm not the one who'll be wearing it... which do YOU like?
Her husband incidentally had left her at the counter to harrass me, never offering his opinion once. And as my wife could have told the lady, I never have an opinion on clothes or jewelery anyway. The questions kept a'coming regardless. including:
"Would a young girl wear this?
Does this match my skin?
Does the black lines in the paua shell make the necklace better or worse?"
The answer to all was "I. DON'T. KNOW! You're the one buying the freakin' things! Form an opinion before I beat myself unconcious with my own pricing gun!"
I never actually said that, of course. She even thanked me quote: "for my kindness" afterwards. And left me a nice pile of braclets to re-stock on the shelves.
And finally, after a parade of 'Can I have a discount?'-ers, several 'how much will *insert store name* sell this for'-s and one money-flinger (Thanks, can I toss your goods at your head in exchange?) I got:
Mr Two-Dollars
Mr $2: How much is this? (Hands me a set of fridge magnets)
Me: Let's see it's...
Mr $2: Two dollars?
*scan*
Me: $7.90
Mr $2: Two dollars?
Me: Nope, seven-ninty.
Mr $2:....
Mr $2: (hopefully) Two dollars?
Me: No. Seven. Dollars. And ninty cents.
Mr $2: I don't want it then.
Me: Okey-dokey.
*scans uber-cheap second item Mr $2 DOES want. Accepts money, hands change to him*
Mr $2: (points to magnets) So that was seven dollars?
Me:
I was THIS close to saying 'No, two dollars" to see his reaction.
The night ended beautifully with some schmuck ripping a sale sign off a display. Then tucking it into a DIFFERENT bin, leading to five different people bringing $20 pillows to the counter expecting them to be 8 bucks.
I love my work.
Sometimes.
Comment