If the president showed up

[figgyx]

I have worked night audit at various hotels for the last twenty years.

This is hands down my favorite response from sucky guests when I state that the hotel is sold out.

So you mean to tell me you have no rooms whatsoever? Are you telling me that if the president showed up for a room you would tell him no?

Well yeah I would - but then again if the president stooped to stay at one of the hotels I worked at i am almost certain he would have made a reservation.

I don't get how dumbasses think that this will change someone's mind and magically make them able to produce an empty room out of thin air.

[Argabarga]

I'd say "Well, Mr. President, as you know, the 3rd Amendment to the Constitution expressly forbids forced quartering, so, have a nice evening!"

[Jester]

Obviously if the President showed up, we'd have to make an exception and find a room for him. And if we were sold out, as we are now, we'd have to clear someone out of one of the rooms. And we'd start with obnoxious assholes that demand special treatment. People like you. Yeah, you have a good point, sir. If the President showed up, you'd definitely be the first one tossed out on the street to make room for him. Thanks for helping to clarify that for us. Now we know.

[Antares]

I'm glad you asked. He was here not 10 minutes ago and I told him there was no room at the inn.

[wheeitsmee]

Clinton once wanted to come stay at the Ahwahnee in Yosemite during his presidency. In the summer. With 4 months notice. They told him "Sorry, no.".

The President travels with a LOT of people. He would need most of the hotel. There would be security issues that needed to be worked out. And people make reservations there a year ahead.

[taxguykarl]

The President travels with a LOT of people. He would need most of the hotel. There would be security issues that needed to be worked out. And people make reservations there a year ahead.

Exactly, since we have no available rooms, we have to turn away the entire entourage.

[Jay 2K Winger]

I had something similar to that at the wholesale club. When I worked FDLP, checking the receipts as customers left (and please, no arguments over this practice, take it to Fratching), there were always some Sucktomers who didn't like having to show their receipt.

Most of the time, their argument was about how it was "illegal searching" and in violation of the Constitution, but we usually shut them up by saying "That Amendment only protects you against the government doing that to you. It doesn't do a thing about private companies."

But I once got someone who snidely remarked, "And if President Bush ((this was during his presidency)) showed up and came through here, would you check his receipt?" I replied, "Absolutely, sir. Very thoroughly. Have to be seen to be doing my job properly in front of the President of these United States."

The Sucktomer gave me a CBF and stalked off once I marked his receipt.

[Smapti]

"Are you kidding? The President would never stay at this shithole."

[EricKei]

"Alrighty then, Sir...Let me get your information, so that I can spread it around to all of the other hotels and airlines in the country, including those we are not affiliated with in any way -- we can do that, you know -- and make sure to let them know that, if the President ever needs a room or an a seat on an airplane, you have graciously volunteered to give up your own reservation in his favor."

[protege]

"The President would never stay at this shithole."

That was my reaction as well!

[EvilEmpryss]

I'm glad you asked. He was here not 10 minutes ago and I told him there was no room at the inn.

Depending on the perceived religiosity of the CS: "Even Mary and Joseph were turned away from a full inn. Are you saying that you're better than them?"

[Jester]

Depending on the perceived religiosity of the CS: "Even Mary and Joseph were turned away from a full inn. Are you saying that you're better than them?"

Possibly the most brilliant retort of all time.

[Mr Hero]

Jesus couldn't even get a room for His birth. What makes you think a mere president would have any better luck?

[earl colby pottinger]

Notice

Clinton once wanted to come stay at the Ahwahnee in Yosemite during his presidency. In the summer. With 4 months notice. They told him "Sorry, no.".

The President travels with a LOT of people. He would need most of the hotel. There would be security issues that needed to be worked out. And people make reservations there a year ahead.

Notice that 4 month pre-booking? Even the POTUS pre-books his room instead of showing up late at night demanding a room "right now".

[MadMike]

This one is along the lines of an old joke. He was expecting you to say, "Yes, I would have a room for the president." And then he'd tell you, "Well, I spoke to the president today, he's not coming, so I'll take his room!"