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  #41  
Old 01-02-2010, 05:28 AM
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Dear Mr Whittiker,

Have you ever seen the movie "Jingle all the Way" staring Arnold Schwarzenegger? This movie might enlighten you as to why you don't want to do your Christmas shopping for the hottest gifts on Christmas Eve, especially at 10:00pm.

I'm not going to give you any Wii's or gift card, but I will give you the movie. It didn't do so well in the box office, but I thought it was funny. You might find it educational.

Sincerely, smart ass manager.



To mini mart

Your clerk was very rude to me after I had purchased a scratch off lottery ticket from your store in losersville. I specifically asked him for the winning ticket worth $100,000 but the ticket he gave me was a losing ticket! As if that wasn't bad enough, when I went to return it to get my money back, he laughed at me! He made me feel like it was my fault when it was him who didn't give me the right ticket.

I demand that clerk be fired, and I also demand that I get the winning ticket worth $100,000. If I don't get what I payed for, I will post my complaint on every consumer complaint website and let the world know what kind of fraud you run.

Louis Sir,

Last edited by rageaholic; 01-02-2010 at 05:31 AM. Reason: Typo
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  #42  
Old 01-03-2010, 04:17 AM
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purplecat41877 purplecat41877 is offline
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Dear Mr. Sir,

I apologize for the clerk laughing at you for requesting a return on your lottery ticket. I will take care of that situation. Also, when you buy scratch offs, you're gambling which means that no one knows where the winning ticket is. Our store policy is that we're not allowed to refund lottery tickets when they lose so the money you spent on the ticket went down the drain.

Sincerely,

Store Manager


Dear Supermarket Manager,

I saw a young man at the register with his light off so I went over there, put my stuff on the belt, and he had the nerve to tell me he was closed. I told him that I wasn't moving and he had to ring me up. A supervisor came over and told me that he was leaving since he was a minor and couldn't work past a certain time. I find this unacceptable and demand that you force all your employees to be available for all hours that your store is open and fire the ones that can't.

Sincerely,

Shopping Queen
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  #43  
Old 01-04-2010, 06:19 PM
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Lace Neil Singer Lace Neil Singer is offline
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Dear Shopping Queen,

That young man you bitched at is my son. As a result, you are banned from every one of our stores.

Good Day.

Supermarket Manager.


Dear Restaurant Owner,

I went into your restaurant and was incensed to see a group of your waitstaff sitting at a table eating dinner. How dare they when there are customers waiting to be served? I had to wait a whole minute before someone came to seat me, and then another minute before I got some service. I demand you talk to your staff and teach them some respect for those who pay their wages, ie myself and other customers.

Yours sincerely,

Mrs I M Speshul.
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  #44  
Old 01-05-2010, 12:37 AM
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Dear Mrs. Speshul,

Wow, I am impressed! It sounds like you know so much about customer service, and how a business should be run. I am willing to offer you a full time job, as a server. We'll play along to your rules, though: No dinner or any other breaks during your shift, and you must approach all customers within a millisecond. Oh, and you'll be working open-close, seven days a week.

I look forward to seeing how well you do!

Sincerely,

Restaurant Owner

Deer Manujur,

I wuz att yore storr yestiday an I neded a baffroom. I aksed teh emmploii annd hee sed rite ovur theyr undur teh siyn taht sed Restrooms. Wel I caint reed annd I doeznt theenk itz rite 2 maek yore cuztmers haff 2 reed! I wanna millin dollas 4 mah trubble!

Sinseerlee,
L. Itterate
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  #45  
Old 01-05-2010, 12:59 AM
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DGoddessChardonnay DGoddessChardonnay is offline
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Dear Mr. L. Itterate-

I'm sorry to hear you had so much difficulty. I'm sending to you a beginner's reader book . . . Read With Dick and Jane.

And also a Webster's Dictionary. Please accept with our warmest regards-

Ms. Speekenspell Wright
Regional VP

Dear FoodMart . .

I was in your store on Christmas Eve and was told you were closing. NOT FAIR . . . I wasn't even done with my shopping yet and now because you dared to close at 5:58 pm (which is what my watch said, while your employee said it was after 6)

I still had to get all my dinner stuff for the 90 relatives that are staying with me for the holidays, so we ended up having to starve with NO CHRISTMAS DINNER because I couldn't come in and get what I needed when I needed it.

I demand a $1000 gift card and a year's worth of free groceries before I will consider shopping in your store again.

Sincerely-

Ms. Cant Telltime
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  #46  
Old 01-05-2010, 01:03 AM
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Dear Ms. Itterate,

I apologize, my employees have never encountered a LOLcat in person. Next time they will be better equipped to handle your special needs.

Yours,

M. Ann Ager
(Owner)

-----

YOU SUCK YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF THE WAY YOU DO BUSINESS YU SHOULD QUIT YOUR JOB AND NOT WORK FOR SUCH CROOKS!!!!!!!

Signed,
Cap S. Locke
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  #47  
Old 01-06-2010, 07:10 PM
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Dear Mr Locke,

I think you should know that someone with obvious mental instabilities is using your email address. If you have any concerns, I suggest you contact your internet service provider.

Yours Sincerely,

Miss Manager.

~~~

Dear Ms Cant Telltime,

Repeat after me; a lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine. The store runs on Greenwich Mean Time, not Customer Standard Time, so the time for closing was correct. Sorry for any inconvienience.

Yours,

Foodmart Drone.


Dear Cinema Manager,

I took my toddler to see Avatar in your cinema last Friday. He started talking to me halfway thru due to being bored so I naturally answered back. I was incensed to be told by one of your ushers that I had to leave due to complaints by some other people in the cinema. I had every right to be there; I demand that you fire this usher and ban the people who complained for life. I would also like free tickets to make up for my bad experience.

Yours sincerely,

Mrs Mona Lott
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  #48  
Old 01-08-2010, 08:09 PM
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Dear Ms. Lott;

I'm sorry, but I can only ban two people from the theatre a month. So it's impossible for me to ban all those people for you.

On a similar note, you and your son are banned from the cinemas.

Enjoy watching TV;
Ms. Manager

========================================
Dear Happy Clown Entertainment Agency;

My darling prince of a boy Johnny only wanted two things for his birthday. A clown at his party, and a high powered rifle.

I think it's HORRIBLY unprofessional of the man you sent, one Mr. Jingles, to have tried to leave before the party was over.

He demanded I drive him to the Emergency Room because he was bleeding. He really shouldn't have been standing in front of my little angel when Johnny was shooting things.

I of course was not going to leave my little Messiah alone to run some two-bit entertainer halfway across town during the middle of his birthday party.

I demand you send me 10 clowns to my next party for free. Also I want to the family of the Late Mr. Jingles to pay me for the emotional trauma Johnny had to suffer watching his birthday clown die.

sincerely;
Mai Sonsakilla
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  #49  
Old 01-10-2010, 12:29 AM
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Dear Mai Sonsakilla,

I am sorry to hear of the experience you had with the late Mr.Jingles at your son's birthday party. However, due to the fact that YOUR kid shot one of our most valued staff members (Mr.Jingles), we will begin taking legal action against you. We believe that YOU should be the one to pay the family of the late Mr. Jingles for the emotional trauma your son caused with his carelessness. Further more, you refused to have Mr.Jingles taken to a hospital to be treated for his injuries, so we will not give you 10 clowns to your next party for free. You will also be blacklisted in our business and we will make sure to black list you with Happy Clown Entertainment Agency and any other subsidiaries.


Sincerely,


B'Ann Forlyfe

================================================== =======

Dear MY ISP,

I called your Tier 1 Tech Support line last night because I got a blue screen on my computer and it wouldn't do anything else. The rep refused to help me and kept saying that my issue was outside of support and that I had to call my computer's manufacturer! I pay for your service, why should I have to call my computer's manufacturer to get this resolved?!! Fire this rude rep and give me free service for life!

Sincerely,

Ima Computer-Dummy
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  #50  
Old 01-10-2010, 01:45 AM
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Dear Ima Computer-Dummy:

We're sorry to hear of your dissatisfaction with our services however after a review of the customer service call it was determined that the best course of action to resolve this issue is to simply have you box up your computer and set it out on the side of the road in front of your house for pick up. Your computer will then be picked up and adopted to a new home, as yours is no longer suitable for habitation.

As far as the request for free service for life goes: we've determined that in the best interest of all concerned that as you won't have a computer any longer, the subject of free internet access is moot.

Sincerely-

I R Smart
CEO, My ISP

Dear Local Phone Company-

I tried calling your 1-800 number expecting to receive the outstanding customer service your commercials advertised but instead was treated rudely by one of your reps.

"Alice" refused to give me what I wanted in the form of a discount. She also said I owed $700 on my wireless bill because of texting and pics.

I was not informed that I had a charge for texts and picture emails, so therefore I'm not required to pay the bill. Besides, this was on my daughter's phone and that was the number I asked that the features be disabled on. I demanded a supervisor who would take these charges off, but was told there were none available.

I demand that these charges be reversed, as I am not made of money nor did I request these features to be added on my unlimited plan. I also want a new iPhone for no charge to compensate me for my troubles.

Sincerely-
Ida Lazyparent
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