Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Bank Holiday Idiots

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Bank Holiday Idiots

    So, yesterday was a Bank Holiday in the UK, and I worked a nice double shift. I was pleased because its time and a half.

    Uhh, I just got here

    I walked into the bar. I still had my coat on, still had my bag over my shoulder, and a customer walked up to me.

    SC: Our food was disgusting! We're leaving!
    Me: Okaaaaaay.

    I look at their clean plates.

    I'm in pain here!!

    A glass randomly fell off a shelf and landed on me, smashing everywhere. It HURT. Never cut me, but my first thought was to clean it up before someone stood on it.

    Customer came up to the bar.

    SC: Whenever you're ready! Tut!

    I felt like throwing the glass in his face.

    Tourists

    SC: I've never been here before, tell me how you order food.
    Me: OK, all you need to do is find a table, note the number of the table, when you're ready to order, come up to the bar. We'll sort everything else out.
    SC: I don't understand.
    Me: Just come up to the bar when you're ready to order. I'll take it here.
    SC: What? I don't understand!
    Me: Just order your food here.
    SC: What? Don't you do table service?
    Me: No we don't I'm afraid.
    SC: So how are we supposed to order?
    Me: Just come up to the bar!
    SC: This is too complicated! I'm leaving!

    It's a holiday!!

    We have some special deals on Mondays. You can get certain drinks cheaper and there are some meal deals you can't get on any other day. However, this does not apply on bank holidays

    SC: You've charged me too much!
    Me: No, you ordered <drink>, <drink> and <drink>. Total is £xx.xx
    SC: That's too much! You have deals on a Monday!
    Me: I'm afraid that excludes Bank Holidays.
    SC: Well no one told me!
    Me: It is stated on all our menus and posters...
    SC: No one told me!
    Me: I'm sorry, theres nothing I can do.
    SC: No one told me!

    Yes, repeating that over and over will make you get your way.

    Pay more if you want.

    Me: Ok, so your total is £xx.xx.
    SC: Are you sure?
    Me: Yes *reads order and prices back to him*
    SC: Thats not enough.
    Me: Oh, did I miss something from your order?
    SC: No, I just dont think you charged me enough.
    Me: No, that's correct.
    SC: I don't think you're telling me the truth.
    Me: Well, thats the total.
    SC: Fine! But I'm not happy about this!

    No, I dont trust you actually

    We have our cellar door locked at all times, except of course, when one of us is in there. I was frequently going in and out sortng out barrels and cleaning the lines, a customer was staring at me the whole time I was going in and out. Each time, I locked the door behind me.

    He shouts.

    SC: WHAT? Dont you trust me or something?
    Me: What?
    SC: Locking the door! You think I'm going to go in there!
    Me: Its one of our rules that the door must be locked at all times.
    SC: Yeah yeah! You just dont trust me! You dont want me going in there!
    Me: Actually, I dont want ANYONE going in there.

    Yes, it's racist not to serve when closed.

    Rang time, we were closed. A Polish woman bursts into the bar.

    Me: I'm sorry, we're closed.
    SC: PLEASE!
    Me: No, I'm sorry, we've cashed up. We're closed.
    She puts her hands together and starts to beg.
    SC: PLEASE!
    Me: No, I'm sorry, it is now against our licence to serve anyone.
    SC: PLEASE!
    Me: No, I'm afraid you have to leave.
    SC: WHY YOU NO SERVE ME! IS IT BECAUSE I POLISH?
    Me: No, it's because we're closed.
    SC: YOU RACIST! YOU DON'T WANT ME HERE!
    Me: OK, I want you to leave, NOW.
    SC: PLEASE!
    Me: So you call me a racist and still want service? NO.
    SC: YOU RACIST!

    This carries on for about ten minutes, with her repeating PLEASE and YOU RACIST. I walked away from her and carried on closing down, while she followed me about.

  • #2
    Pay more if you want.

    Me: Ok, so your total is £xx.xx.
    SC: Are you sure?
    Me: Yes *reads order and prices back to him*
    SC: Thats not enough.
    Me: Oh, did I miss something from your order?
    SC: No, I just dont think you charged me enough.
    Me: No, that's correct.
    SC: I don't think you're telling me the truth.
    Me: Well, thats the total.
    SC: Fine! But I'm not happy about this!


    Hang on, he was pissed because the total was cheaper than what he thought? wtf I'd be pretty happy with that.

    I think that sc was a few snags short of a barbie.

    Comment


    • #3
      Quoth customersruinmylife View Post
      SC: So how are we supposed to order?
      Me: Just come up to the bar!
      SC: This is too complicated! I'm leaving!


      Too complicated? McDonald's, a restaurant chain whose customer base is largely comprised of complete idiots, has made billions on the "order at the counter" concept.
      You have apparently met the last person on earth to have never heard of a McDonald's.

      (No offense intended for those who eat at Mickey D's - I do too, and am constantly amazed at the stupidity of my fellow diners.)

      If you have to ask, it's probably better posted at www.fratching.com

      Comment


      • #4
        i must have missed the part of my sociology class that told us that polish is a race...geh.

        ordering at the bar is too complex, yet he/she was able to drive there...hmm.

        save me from the complexities of life...
        look! it's ghengis khan!
        Sorry, but while I can do many things, extracting heads from anuses isn't one of them. (so sayeth the irv)

        Comment


        • #5
          What's a bank holiday?
          ...how do used tampons attract thieves? ---Sleepwalker

          Chickens are Asexual!

          Comment


          • #6
            It's a holiday. For banks.

            Seriously though, we get several days of bank holiday, where most businesses close down, through out the year here in the UK. (I think it's around 4 or 5 days each year?) Either way, there's a wikipedia page on bank holidays.

            And on an Off Topic note:

            Did anyone else here forget that it was a Bank Holiday yesterday?.
            I ended up outside of work before I remembered. Of course the large metal shutters over everything helped remind me of that :P

            Edit: Just to note, but I remember hearing that Banks arn't allowed to be open on Bank Holidays. Anyone else know if this is true?
            Last edited by Munty; 05-08-2007, 04:09 PM.

            Comment


            • #7
              Bank holiday in the UK works a lot like a federal holiday in the US. Basically all the federal-type agencies are closed, and a lot of offices are closed also. Plus people often get paid "holiday" pay rates for working those days.

              ^-.-^
              Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

              Comment


              • #8
                Quoth customersruinmylife View Post

                Me: Ok, so your total is £xx.xx.
                SC: Are you sure?
                Me: Yes *reads order and prices back to him*
                This SC sound like me when I take the critters to the veterinarian. After working 2 1/2 years at an emergency animal hospital, I'm always surprised by how inexpensive my regular vet is.

                I never get sucky about it, though!
                Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Sounds like an Irish theme pub I visited at Heathrow whilst waiting for a flight - anywhere close? I've got no idea if it's part of a chain or anything, but they have that same system.

                  Rapscallion

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Quoth bannedanna View Post
                    But then again, 90% of tourists forget to pack their brains when they go abroad...
                    That is, assuming they had brains to pack in the first place. I imagine any of our fine members in the travel business can also support that statement.

                    On another note, I wonder if idiocy is a race, religion or what? It seems almost like veganism (not to put down the vegans this is just an example) in that it's a way of life, but can we please please please not offer "idiot" options? That'll only encourage them.
                    Last edited by MMATM; 05-08-2007, 07:49 PM. Reason: Forgot quote :-[
                    "I'm not a crazed gunman, dad, I'm an assassin... Well, the difference being one is a job and the other's mental sickness!" -The Sniper

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      SC: Whenever you're ready! Tut!
                      OK, thanks. (then finish cleaning up)

                      SC: This is too complicated! I'm leaving!
                      Thanks. have a great day.

                      SC: You've charged me too much!
                      We prefer to call it an idiot tax.

                      SC: Thats not enough.
                      Wow, you're right! You're total is XXX.XX

                      SC: WHAT? Dont you trust me or something?
                      Oh, I trust you. I just don't trust the rats in there. They're HUGE!

                      SC: WHY YOU NO SERVE ME! IS IT BECAUSE I POLISH?
                      No ma'am. We reserve the right not to serve anyone wearing a babushka.
                      This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth Rapscallion View Post
                        Sounds like an Irish theme pub I visited at Heathrow whilst waiting for a flight - anywhere close? I've got no idea if it's part of a chain or anything, but they have that same system.

                        Rapscallion
                        Weatherspoons operate that way too.
                        ludo ergo sum

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth customersruinmylife View Post
                          Me: I'm sorry, we're closed.
                          SC: PLEASE!
                          Me: No, I'm sorry, we've cashed up. We're closed.
                          She puts her hands together and starts to beg.
                          SC: PLEASE!
                          Me: No, I'm sorry, it is now against our licence to serve anyone.
                          SC: PLEASE!
                          Me: No, I'm afraid you have to leave.
                          SC: WHY YOU NO SERVE ME! IS IT BECAUSE I POLISH?
                          Me: No, it's because we're closed.
                          SC: YOU RACIST! YOU DON'T WANT ME HERE!
                          Me: OK, I want you to leave, NOW.
                          SC: PLEASE!
                          Me: So you call me a racist and still want service? NO.
                          SC: YOU RACIST!
                          OOh I hate people like this.
                          ...but I'm a bastard and so desensitized to the scum of humanity that I'm immune to the Stun status effect.
                          Quoth Gravekeeper

                          Comment

                          Working...
                          X