"Is this a real person?"

[JustADude]

So the reason for this post is to ask for some advice. The environment I work in is somewhat relaxed, in the sense that if I cracked a joke at a customer's expense, my boss would likely find it funny too, although I can't be outright rude.

What do you all say when the customer asks if they're talking to a real person?

Given your situation, I'd say something along the lines of:

"Sorry, I'm actually a wooden puppet, but I really want to be a real boy some day!"
"Nope, I'm a figment of your imagination. Call me Tyler,"
or
"Maaaaaybe. Then again, maybe I'm a sea-slug just dreaming I'm a man."

Kudos and cookies if you can get all the references.

[Leopardmadcat]

...Is this a real person?"

I used to get that all the time, after your 10,000th call you are sorta stuck in a pattern. I did however get to have some fun with it...

"Yes this a real agent, the computers haven't yet taken over so we actually still have jobs!" <-- The Customers couldn't agree more with me on that one!

"Beep! I'm sorry your query was not understood, please try rephrasing the question" <-- O.K. I never actually did that... but Ohhh was I tempted!

[Applerod]

I'd imagine* most(..?) people asking who or what they're speaking with, and likely old enough to remember a time before automated voices, are simply confused and/or incredulous when they switch to a live person. I know my dad--who is a child of the 30's--still thinks of automatic voice message systems as a novelty, so speaking with a live person is a 'big deal' and I could see him asking something like: "Hello? Am I speaking to a real person?? Great! What's your name? Noreen? Hi Noreen, my name is Dr. So-and-So and--wait, dang it -- spilled goat's milk on my keyboard! Hello??"
*Of course I've never worked phones so those people who call up and seriously can't tell if they're talking to a live human or not would be a little unsettling and more than a little frustrating after caller #600.

[Damien]

"we are the Borg, you will be assimilated... resistance is futile"

[Misanthropical]

Damn you, Damien! I nearly choked on my coffee! That was funny!

[Damien]

why, thank you

I would love for Gravekeeper to say it to some of the loons he gets on the phone too

[Tireana Dorcha]

I have been asked that a few times, After saying "Thank you for calling blah blah blah my name is Fiyero...". It goes well with "I didn't think you'd be open" grrr - why call then?

I get a similar one:
Me: "Family Facility this is Tireana."
SC: "Are you open?"

No...no we're not. I just came down when we were closed to answer the phones because I have nothing better to do with my life.

[Samaliel]

Hey now, this could be a valid question : the shop could be staffed but not open to the public.