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  • I "love" fixing printer problems (longish)

    Printing woes from the library.

    Preface
    Our printers are the high volume printers. They only print in black and white. We have a special color printer. We only use the paper given to us because the higher ups tell us too and that any other paper can jam the printer (it has happened)

    Woe #1
    I've gotten several people who open up the printer tray to put in special resume paper which is very thick in comparison to the normal paper. I have told these people that I stopped that they aren't allowed to do that and then I get one of the following reactions:

    1) The "how dare you talk to me" response
    2) "Well it's just this one time, you can let me right?"
    3) "Well this other computer lab let me do it" (I seriously doubt that if the other labs had known what you were doing they would have let you)
    or 4) (most often) I didn't know

    What's funny is that in all 4 cases when I explain that we have an actual printing services dept (faxes, large printings, thesis printing, resume, etc.) and where it is located, 99.9998% of them get mad that I ask them to walk the 30yrds and down 2 flights of steps to go there.

    Woe #2
    Our printers can only print certain fonts because the school doesn't want to pay $2500 for each printer so that they can print all fonts. When a non-printable job is sent, the printer tries to print it but only spits out blank paper. We have signs posted all over the place yet it still happens and people still get pissed. They expect me to hand over the money that they lost because they "didn't know" about the font issues. My response, "I'm sorry but I'm not going to give you back the 3 cents per page it cost to print your document. How many pages was it? One? Well if you really want your money back, there's a form you can go fill out and take across the way (about a 10 min walk) for them to put it back on your card. (caveat I understand if a person loses a 30 page paper or if a prof makes a student print out a lot, but come on!!! Bitch at me over 3 cents even though you didn't read the rules about printing. How the hell did you get into college?)

    Woe #3
    Our printers cannot print powerpoint presentations with backgrounds very easily, if at all. If it gets a job like this it will take it forever (i.e. 5 min for a 30 slide presentation done in 6 slides per page format) or it will just kill the printer and force us to reboot the printer. We had this patron try and print a 120 page presentation and when it didn't print it out in a timely fashion i.e. within 30sec, he proceeded to goto every other printer in the library and try and print the job. He made all 6 printers in the library crap out within 5 minutes of one another and it took another 35 to figure out what was going on because after we fixed one printer another would go out because he would try and print on the one that was just fixed.

    Woe #4
    Our color printer can only print on one side. Too many people will print out a page and then immediately take out the tray put the just printed paper down and try and print on the other side. Not only does this mess up the sheet below, but it also messes up the internals of the printer, jamming it. I don't much care for touching the very hot part of the printer to fix the problem because that's the part that messes up.

    Woe #5
    Students love to bother me when I'm trying to stock paper. I have been hunched over, throwing ream after ream into the storage area only to have some jackass reach across the hand truck and me or push the truck out of the way while I'm still trying to stock the paper. The conversation usually goes something like this:

    Me
    SP (sucky patron)

    Me: "Excuse me, but there's another printer right over there (pointing to other printer) for you to use."
    SP: "So when will it be back up?"
    Me: "Another minute or so." (it takes me at most a minute to fill the trays and stock the storage area)
    SP: "Well could you hurry it up?!?! I have paper due for a class in the next 5 min."
    Me: "I'm going as fast as I can (I have on occasion slowed down at this point depending how how rude they're being to me), but in the mean time you can walk to the other printer and print from there"
    SP: "Fine."
    They usually either wait the 30 more seconds it takes for me to finish up all the while staring daggers in the back of my skull, or they walk to the other printer only to find that others, seeing that I was working on one printer, have gone to the other and a line has formed.

    What's really funny is to watch the idiots rush to get in line at the working printer and the second I get finished, run back only to have to stand in line for the printer I just finished working on. I love that redeeming value.

    Woe #6
    People love to open the trays to get clean paper to work on stuff and get mad when I tell them to goto the recycle bin and grab some paper from there. At every print station there is a recycle bin right beside it, and a lot of the time it has blank sheets from failed jobs or extra sheets that just got sent out with the job.

    Woe #7/8
    We have a machine that will add money to your account, or if a patron is not a student, they can buy a print card from. Other than the obvious not reading the directions posted on the machine, told by us, and/or walked through with by us, we get patrons who for some reason can't get money put on the card. the biggest issues: they put the money in the wrong account (I must get the "I have money/I just put money on my card" line at least 25 times a 3 hrs shift during the first of the year and finals week, or (for the ones that get a print card) they forgot that we told them it costs a dollar to buy the card and you have to put a dollar on it so you can print.


    I just wish they would do the two things I recommend: put locks on the trays, and give me a clue-by-4 to hit these people upside the head...well at least put the locks on the trays. Oh well a man can dream can't he?
    Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.

  • #2
    Ah the university printers. The guy next to me in your dorm had a magic printer card that never deducted any money off it. It was highly prized in our hall and everyone (all 120 of us) used it the entire first year.
    Yes. I know my typing sucks but I have a large orange cat sitting on my keyboard and a small disturbed dog trying to sniff his butt

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    • #3
      Ah, printer nazi caretaker was part of my duties in the student labs during college. I know right where you're coming from, looney_librarian. We kept the printers back in the support room with us because we used punch cards to show number of pages used. Yes, dinosaurs and floppy disks still roamed the earth.

      We had a computer tied to the UNIX print server up all the time so we could monitor the print jobs. And delete them as needed. The printers only had 4MB of RAM, so long jobs spooled from the server slowly enough that we could kill them if needed. Very useful when someone sent huge jobs without alerting us (as per the rules) so we could divert other jobs to the second printer while they came out. Best part of the job: We had keys so we could have LAN parties (although we didn't call them that then) after hours. Played many games of Doom, Descent, and Starcraft in there.
      The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
      "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
      Hoc spatio locantur.

      Comment


      • #4
        Our printers cannot print powerpoint presentations with backgrounds very easily, if at all. If it gets a job like this it will take it forever (i.e. 5 min for a 30 slide presentation done in 6 slides per page format) or it will just kill the printer and force us to reboot the printer.
        Here's a freebie for you that I hope make your life easier in the future. Both PowerPoint and Adobe Acrobat use proprietary print drivers, ie, they don't use the standard driver. (Probably others out there that I'm not aware of.) This is what causes the hell trying to print those files. The way around this is to print to a file, then COPY the file to the printer.

        It works wonderfully.
        If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.
        --Woodrow Willson

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        • #5
          Quoth QASlave View Post
          It works wonderfully.
          Neat trick! Now I just need to get it through the user's skulls. Anyone got a spare diamond tip for my jackhammer?
          The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
          "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
          Hoc spatio locantur.

          Comment


          • #6
            Anyone got a spare diamond tip for my jackhammer?
            Oh, I feel for you there. I used to do 'Executive Support' at a company I worked for. Basically, it was supporting the execs of an internet company, most of who are brain dead when it came to computers. Now the execs, weren't bad, their admins we stark raving lunitics.

            We were doing an upgrade of Outlook, (97 to 2000 I believe), anyway, 2000 did not support PABs (Personal Address Books). This was all handled with 'Contacts'. (Hell, the install converted the PABs into a contact list). The snotty little bitch admin wanted to keep her PABs, I told her that with 2000, that's impossible, but she could stay on 97. WELL, she wanted some feature that was new in 2000 AND keep her PABs. No can do. She throws a fit. I said "You know what? Talk to Bill Gates!" Then I walked away.

            She bitched to my manager and God bless her she said, "What did you expect? It's one or the other. What part of you can't have both don't you understand? We didn't write the program. Microsoft did."

            Alas, we were both laid off about 3 months later. (With about 300 other people.) Best thing that ever happened to me.
            If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.
            --Woodrow Willson

            Comment


            • #7
              Woe #1
              I've gotten several people who open up the printer tray to put in special resume paper which is very thick in comparison to the normal paper. I have told these people that I stopped that they aren't allowed to do that and then I get one of the following reactions:

              1) The "how dare you talk to me" response
              2) "Well it's just this one time, you can let me right?"
              3) "Well this other computer lab let me do it" (I seriously doubt that if the other labs had known what you were doing they would have let you)
              or 4) (most often) I didn't know
              That reminds me of this woman who was changing our paper with her resume paper. Then it jammed, and she got me. I open up and take out the resume paper that jammed and I told her that she can't use resume paper, it jams the printer.
              She said: But it was working fine a minute ago!

              then she was going on like I'm being unreasonable about it

              Woe #6
              People love to open the trays to get clean paper to work on stuff and get mad when I tell them to goto the recycle bin and grab some paper from there. At every print station there is a recycle bin right beside it, and a lot of the time it has blank sheets from failed jobs or extra sheets that just got sent out with the job.
              That happens a lot here (maybe not lately). I just don't get the cheap-assness that keep people from buying paper.
              Time! Time! Time is what turns kittens into cats.

              Don't teach me a lesson; all I learn is that you are an asshole.

              I wish porn had subtitles.

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              • #8
                How about having to do printer support when you are supposed to work on their CAMERAS!!??!

                Have I mentioned that I am basically self taught on Windows tech support?

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