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How do they find me? (Long, like always)

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  • How do they find me? (Long, like always)

    Bloody hell, it' only Monday and I have two postworthy jerks I must vent about. Once again, I'm ripping off the popular format.....

    I didn't read the sign I looked at four times!

    As I have mentioned in the past, I work the service counter during the week, so I normally only deal with mechanics and service writers. If they get sucky with me, I tell them exactly where to go and give them a map on how to get there. But I digress.....

    I was sitting at my computer working on a couple of used car invoices. I look up at the window in front of me, and this old guy is staring in at me as he walks slowly past. Weird, but whatever. People look in all the time, since this window looks out at the service drive where customers bring their cars in. I go back to my invoices, and look up again in a moment and this same guy is staring in at me. He sees me see him, and walks away slowly. I think, "This guys gonna come in here, I know it." I'm intuitive like that. I get up and walk up front to finish my paperwork, and as I'm coming back I see the same douche staring at the outside of my door. What the hell, man? Not two seconds pass and he walks in.

    I should mention that the window he was looking into says "Mechanics Only" in foot-tall letters. My door has a red sign at eye-level that says "Employees Only". The way he looked in and the way he was looking at the door, I know he saw them and read them. "Signs?!? I am an SC, they don't apply!"

    Me: Too busy for old farts
    OF: Old fart
    C: Parts guy
    Mechanic: Two guesses....

    OF: I have some questions about my truck that you can help me with.
    Me: I'm sorry sir, this counter is for mechanics, I need you to go to the retail counter. They will be happy to help you.
    OF: I don't want to walk over there, so you can help me.
    C: Sir, the retail counter is up front around the corner.
    Me: Sir, I need to keep this counter available for the mechanics. That's why I'm here.
    OF: Don't want to work, huh?

    Now I'm getting heated. I bust my ass at work, consistently in the top three in sales every month, if not #1. I work. All. Day. Long.

    Me: Sir, I am working. This is my job. If I am helping you instead of the mechanics, I'm not doing my job. We have a counter just for you. It's called the retail counter and it's up front.
    OF: Now, see here, young man! I am a cus-

    At this point a mechanic came in and I reached right past this douche-liner and took the mechanic's parts requisition. The look on OF's face was pretty sweet.

    OF: <leaves, with threats of lost jobs and such.>
    Mechanic: I don't think he likes you.
    C: Notice Jaded is giving his "I-don't-give-a-shit" face.

    It ain't over. A few minutes later my boss came back with his "Why do I have to do this?" look.

    Boss: Jaded, what did you tell that gentleman?
    Me: I told him he needed to use the retail counter. He didn't like that much.
    Boss: That's all you said?
    Me: Pretty much. I told him if I let him stay back here then I can't help the mechanics, and that we have a counter that's just for him.
    Boss: OK
    C: What did he say happened?
    Boss: He says you threw him out and didn't feel like working.
    Me & C:



    What is this "No Soliciting" you speak of?

    This one isn't really a customer, since she wasn't intent on buying anything, but I ain't doin' a separate post just for her.

    I was helping a mechanic with a big repair order when this scantily clad girl with a European accent comes strolling in.This story's lookin' up, right? Uh, no.

    She was carrying a box so my first thought was that she was a delivery driver. In my town scantily clad girls are used quite often for this purpose. I'm not complaining about that.

    Sadly, she was selling useless crap.

    Girl: I am Inga, buy my crap!
    Me: You forgot already?
    Mechanic: My hairdresser
    SD: Service Director

    Me: Hello. Is this a drop off?
    Girl: No, I am with <some company I've never heard of> and we are selling this useless crap. This is a children's book that most kids love! You should get it for your kids!
    Me: I don't have kids.
    Girl: Oh! Then for your little brothers and sisters!
    Me: The youngest is 24, and her reading level is quite advanced.
    Girl: Maybe for your little nieces and nephews? Children love this book!<Yeah, you mentioned that>
    Me: My niece is a holy terror and I don't buy her anything.
    Girl: <giving up on the book> I have these sports watches that men love!<seeing a pattern?>
    Me: <holding up both wrists> I don't wear a watch.
    Girl: Oh, but they retail for $25! I will sell you four for $20! This is a good deal!
    Me: I don't need one watch, let alone four. $20 will supply me with beer for a week.
    Girl: OK.<turns to mechanic> Hello.....
    Mechanic: The fuck makes you think I want any of that crap?
    Girl: .................OK! I will see you guys later!<walks out the door>

    By now the service director has figured out that there is a solicitor in the building, and he meets her coming out the door.

    SD: You! By any chance did you happen to notice any one of the several "No Soliciting" signs that you went strolling past? You are trespassing! Leave!
    Girl: I don't speak the English so good.......
    SD: You speak it better than that. Out, before I have you arrested!
    Girl: OK, I go.......
    Me:

    She was cute, too. Oh well.


    I hope I don't have two SC's everyday this week.
    Last edited by Jadedcarguy; 09-11-2007, 06:05 AM.
    I know nothing and I can prove it!

  • #2
    Shoulda told the boss that if you had thrown him out, he'd have the bruises and/or a concussion to show it.

    Why do old people think they have a license to bypass signs and such?

    "See here young man...", indeed.

    I don't think there could EVER be a positive outcome to a sentence that started that way.

    Dickhead.
    "So, if you wanna put places like that outta business, just stop being so rock-chewingly stupid." ~ Raudf, 9/19/13

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    • #3
      Gravekeeper should have patented that format. He'd be rich!
      This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

      Comment


      • #4
        Quoth Jadedcarguy View Post
        OF: Now, see here, young man! I am a cus-
        What do you want to bet that sentence was going to end with "and the customer is always right!"?
        It is a terrible thing to see and have no vision.
        -Helen Keller

        I got this av from Court Records, made by Croik!

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        • #5
          Quoth bigjimaz View Post
          Gravekeeper should have patented that format. He'd be rich!
          He wasn't exactly the first here to use it. For example, PhoneJockey's posts have always been short and snappy little vignettes.

          Back on topic - those solicitors can be kind of fun (if you have time - a big if). I remember one walking into the wine store and I became obsessed with selling to the seller. We danced the sales dance for a bit, neither of us falling for the other's pitch, until finally we both started laughing and he left.

          If you have to ask, it's probably better posted at www.fratching.com

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          • #6
            The Moonies came through a restaurant a month or so ago when I as having lunch. The owners didn't kick them out, but that may be because they took, "No," for an answer, kept their voices down, and the waitresses probably didn't know they could kick them out.
            Labor boards have info on local laws for free
            HR believes the first person in the door
            Learn how to go over whackamole bosses' heads safely
            Document everything
            CS proves Dunning-Kruger effect

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            • #7
              My rule about solicitors: Unless you are a really cute kid and selling cookies or candy, I don't want any. If you are some semi-adult douchbag that's too dumb to find a real job* and/or read the "No Soliciting" signs on my front door, you deserve all the abuse you get.

              I feel bad about turning down people that are trying to make a living selling their (often really good) handicrafts or artwork, because it feels like I'm dissing their stuff. But I don't want to encourage a bad habit. A web site isn't that hard or expensive to set up. Nor is eBay that difficult. And there's always the local flea market and conventions!

              __________________________

              *No offense to those that do sell door-to-door because they really couldn't find anything else and are just doing this to make ends meet until something better comes along. But the ones I've met are doing this because they are "too good" for a retail job, that usually earns them the same pay, and refuse to see that the "business" is usually a scam.
              A smile is just a grimace that's been edited for public consumption. -- Tony Cochran

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              • #8
                Quoth Jadedcarguy View Post
                Oh, but they retail for $25! I will sell you four for $20!
                Uh... in what way is that a good business practice for her? Selling watches at $20 below their retail?
                Second off, You obviously looked like someone who needed four watches to catch up on all that never-checking-the-watch-you-don't-own, to help average out the world!
                "I call murder on that!"

                Comment


                • #9
                  Quoth Jadedcarguy View Post
                  C: Notice Jaded is giving his "I-don't-give-a-shit" face.
                  Best. Line. Ever.

                  *goes off to work on his "I-don't-give-a-shit" face*
                  Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

                  http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Juwl View Post
                    Uh... in what way is that a good business practice for her? Selling watches at $20 below their retail?
                    Second off, You obviously looked like someone who needed four watches to catch up on all that never-checking-the-watch-you-don't-own, to help average out the world!
                    Yeah, seemed like I might have been buying garbage had I taken the offer.
                    I know nothing and I can prove it!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth Tigress View Post
                      *No offense to those that do sell door-to-door because they really couldn't find anything else and are just doing this to make ends meet until something better comes along. But the ones I've met are doing this because they are "too good" for a retail job, that usually earns them the same pay, and refuse to see that the "business" is usually a scam.
                      The ones that bother me are the obviously school-age children that are not in school that are given totes of crap to sell, dropped off in some parking lot, and basically told to annoy people coming or going. We even get some in my apartment complex. Which has big "No Soliciting" signs at every parking lot entrance that they never fail to "miss" seeing. The office will sometimes approve like Girl Scouts, but these others always are around after the office is closed. Had one at my door @10pm on night! No way in hell I'm opening the door that late to someone I don't recognize! Then I called the night security patrol.
                      It's floating wicker propelled by fire!

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