Things I am not allowed to do at work.

[Bella_Vixen]

Not allowed to play with sharp knives.

The only reason I'm allowed to use the knives when working in deli is because they aren't sharp.

Seriously, the paring knives can't cut melted butter.

[Squeaksmyalias]

Not allowed to build a fort out of boxes that the lab dropped off then tuck myself in the corner under my table to work. Then when people go to drop work off for me I can't growl and say I don't want it. I was told this after I scared the heck out of the head of digital, she thought it was hilarious but my supervisor said to stop....

[sarasquirrel]

- not allowed to make gravestones that say Walgreens and Rite Aid on them, even though the manager thought the idea was cute

-not allowed to make stockings with the names Walgreens and Rite Aid and put coal in them. again, manager thought it was funny, but said dont do it

-not allowed to out burp your male coworkers

[fireheart]

I'm not allowed to dress up for Halloween.
Do not shout out random things from video walkthroughs. (Specifically the phrases "It's that squirrel! Come back squirrel!" and "Chocolatechocolatechocolatechocolatechocolate CHOCOLATE! I'm eating all of the CHOCOLATES!")
Much as I would love to, I do believe that I am not allowed to tell customers that the reason why we do not offer <promotion> to <company brand stores> is because customers keep abusing said <promotion>

[sarasquirrel]

I'm not allowed to dress up for Halloween.
Do not shout out random things from video walkthroughs. (Specifically the phrases "It's that squirrel! Come back squirrel!" and "Chocolatechocolatechocolatechocolatechocolate CHOCOLATE! I'm eating all of the CHOCOLATES!")
Much as I would love to, I do believe that I am not allowed to tell customers that the reason why we do not offer <promotion> to <company brand stores> is because customers keep abusing said <promotion>

im so going to yell out "its that squirrel! come back squirrel!" at work tomorrow if i remember. i have no idea where its from, but i dont care...its a squirrel

[fireheart]

im so going to yell out "its that squirrel! come back squirrel!" at work tomorrow if i remember. i have no idea where its from, but i dont care...its a squirrel

It's from this.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

My Mr. Bean voice is not appropriate anytime or anyplace at work.

[hatori]

Not allowed to tell those under me, "Do whatever."

An answer to how I feel should not be, "meh."

When describing something, I should attempt something better than, "The thing with the thing."

[AccountingDrone]

You have to teach me how to say it! My grandmother was fluent in Gaelic, but, being a proper lady, would never abide foul language. It could soooooo come in handy at work, though.

On that note, i am not allowed to say "for f*cks sake" in Klingon @ work. Or, really, anything in Klingon, for that matter.

Póg mo Thóin roughly [only reason i know that is because it is an old SCA meme. I think I got the diacriticals right =)

[zombiequeen]

Not allowed to tell those under me, "Do whatever."

An answer to how I feel should not be, "meh."

When describing something, I should attempt something better than, "The thing with the thing."

That was exactly how I was at work this summer. I loved being in slight control of the servers, they hated it.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Not allowed to suggest that the swamp invest in one CDU for each department, to utter Christmas phrases in a deep avuncular voice, and open its arms in a friendly, welcoming fashion.

Cookies for the reference.

[Boggles]

The counter display boxes are for selling chocolate from. Duct tape will not be used to turn them into Greedy Monkey Traps!

[Mr. Security]

I'm not allowed to tell the crazy women who rants about secret dirty police that I am in fact one and there is no where she can hide from us

[superhotelworker]

I am not allowed to tell guests they have to buy me soda, even if it's a regular who usually does.

[fireheart]

I am most DEFINITELY not allowed to do this:



Linky: http://www.xkcd.com/236/