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Fastest Resignation?

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  • #16
    4 hours, they put me on the mcdonalds drive-thru

    I told them that I have very low hearing in one ear, and guess which ear they put the headset on.....

    4 hours of hearing nothing but car engines and people screaming that I was fucking useless... $100 an hour and I wouldnt put up with that!
    I wasnt put on this earth to make you feel like a man ~ Mary Bertone

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    • #17
      There were two cart attendants that were hired during my first year at Target that lasted less than an hour. I was supposed to train them but they said would just watch how I did it and sat down. I told the supervisor to do something about those losers and when he tried they left and never came back, and they certainly weren't missed.
      "I don't have an anger problem I have an idiot problem!" - Hank Hill

      When in deadly danger, when beset by doubt, run around in little circles, wave your arms and shout!

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      • #18
        Quoth Ringtail Z28 View Post
        There were two cart attendants that were hired during my first year at Target that lasted less than an hour. I was supposed to train them but they said would just watch how I did it and sat down. I told the supervisor to do something about those losers and when he tried they left and never came back, and they certainly weren't missed.
        I see CBFH was briefly employed by your Target store then.

        Anyhow, we've had a few people (mostly seasonal people we hire for Christmas) quit after just a couple shifts. One guy left for his lunch break and never came back.

        There was even another person who left the store for her lunch break during orientation--and never returned.

        We call these people the smart ones.
        Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

        "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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        • #19
          At an office I worked at we hired a new girl and someone was showing her a few things she would be doing on the computer. She asked if she could go to her car to "get something" real quick - and never came back... see if you're going to quit, at least have the guts to tell someone you're quitting - don't just cowardly walk out or "not show up".....

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          • #20
            Quoth air914 View Post
            At an office I worked at we hired a new girl and someone was showing her a few things she would be doing on the computer. She asked if she could go to her car to "get something" real quick - and never came back... see if you're going to quit, at least have the guts to tell someone you're quitting - don't just cowardly walk out or "not show up".....
            you know, I've at least made up a lame excuse... my favorite quitting experience

            me- I'm sorry, but this job just isn't working with my class schedule anymore
            boss- umm, this is a set your own schedule place...
            me- yeah, but I figured that a lame excuse was better than just quitting for no reason...
            boss- fair enough, if you need a job later feel free to call us, we always need people.
            me- I'll keep it in mind (no I won't)

            ... and what's sad is that conversation really did happen pretty much exactly like that...
            If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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            • #21
              We don't get a lot of true fast resignations because we have three weeks of cushy paid training, but we have several people who quit during the first day of taking calls. My favorite though was the guy who quit at the end of the last day of training... because he had been hired at a call center for a different cable company and they prefer people who have gone through our training, since theirs is only two weeks!
              Last edited by Anriana; 02-24-2008, 05:39 AM.

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              • #22
                If classroom training doesn't count, two hours is my personal best.

                It was in a call center. The four weeks of training went pretty well. I had the top scores on my class, so when I started my first real day, expectations were reasonably high.

                From listening to calls during training, I already knew I wasn't going to like the job... but it didn't prepare me for the horror of the real thing. At first break, I called my answering machine and found out I'd been offered a job with another company. Lucky me.

                So I returned from break.

                Me (to boss): I got offered another job. I'm willing to give two weeks notice, but truthfully, I'd just as soon leave now.
                Boss: You're not going to do us much good for two weeks, so you might as well go.
                Me: Bye.
                Boss: Well, that was quick.
                I was neat, clean, shaved and sober, and I didn't care who knew it. -- Raymond Chandler

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                • #23
                  Quoth TNT View Post
                  Me (to boss): I got offered another job. I'm willing to give two weeks notice, but truthfully, I'd just as soon leave now.
                  Boss: You're not going to do us much good for two weeks, so you might as well go.
                  Me: Bye.
                  Boss: Well, that was quick.
                  Props to you for being upfront and honest and not slinking out the door. Seems like the boss appreciated it too.
                  "So, if you wanna put places like that outta business, just stop being so rock-chewingly stupid." ~ Raudf, 9/19/13

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                  • #24
                    For Myself, about a month, it was a kitchen porter job while I was doing my catering training.

                    Let's give an example of an average week

                    8am-4pm - College (Mon, Weds,Thurst,Fri) and on tuedays 8am-11/12pm
                    5pm-Close (around 11 or 12) 4 Days a week
                    Saturday Night (5pm-close) and sunday mornings (7am-2pm)

                    I loved the job but the only reason I had to resign was because of the utter exhaustion I was going through, I realised enough was enough when I collapsed and went in and out of conciousness while at college and the only thing I worried about was being ready for service (It was a sort of train as you work course, everyday we did lunch for the cafe in college, tuesday nights we did the restaurant (Which was the same place as the cafe)
                    I am the nocturnal echo-locating flying mammal man.

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                    • #25
                      My personal worst was two hours. Same as a few other tales here... It was a telemarketing job. They were just starting up so I was the only person there to start with. Another guy showed up about 30 minutes in. We were trying to sell gift certificates to a restaurant that was pretty nice, but located in a seedy part of town. The other guy quit after being there for an hour and I followed him about 15 minutes later.

                      The funniest part was when I got home and told my Dad I had a new job but that I had already quit. He couldn't believe I even tried it.

                      Steve B.

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                      • #26
                        ummm.... for me it depends - do you count the one where I went in and was offered the position (I think on a Tuesday or Wednesday), and was expected back to do the training and to hand in the paperwork, but then ring on Friday to say I had another job?

                        If not, then after a 3 hour shift as bagger/trolley collector when I was about 18.

                        Slyt
                        When I said "From my research", what I actually meant to say was "Made shit up" - from a thottbot thread

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                        • #27
                          Quoth UncleImpy View Post
                          She watches NE1 leave, looks back at me, and I swear, deadpan, asks, "Does that mean I can work his hours as well, now?"
                          I so totally would've asked the same question.

                          My shortest? Three days, at the dollar store. I was only working there until I got hired for Goodwill.
                          Unseen but seeing
                          oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
                          There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
                          3rd shift needs love, too
                          RIP, mo bhrionglóid

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                          • #28
                            Half a day for me. Lunch time. I went to work many years ago for a carpet/flooring store.

                            The one unisex bathroom for customers and employees alike was so dirty that it had hair growing on the toilet seat almost. Just men in that store. Big surprise. No way was I cleaning that. Or using it. Ick.

                            add to that not one customer darkened the door the 4 hours I was actually there. I split at lunch and never went back.

                            It's like another poster said "It's not like it's going on my resume."

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                            • #29
                              My personal "best" is a wonderful 9 months. I probably should have quit after the first two months though, when I saw the job going downhill quickly. Ended up not giving a full two weeks notice and being cursed out by the GM in the lobby by the concession, during the evening rush.

                              As for observed "bests", most people manage to work at least one entire shift before quitting, or not showing up for their next, since we're only counting people who have worked past training. I have seen some fairly spectacular idiocy in getting people turfed. Like the one who "had a friend bring her $100 that he owed her, and that's what that wad of cash in her pocket was." The fact her till was $100 short? Coincidence.
                              Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

                              http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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                              • #30
                                I've got four actually, from my last job. It was a combined company, did business advice, tax help, insurance, accounting, and incredibly bad building work - which I was hired for allegedly.
                                I worked there for two months before deciding that it was better to be unemployed than working with people who regularly broke the health and safety laws on building sites, then expected me to take responsibility for their idiocy and cheapness. I wasn't doing what my job title said, wasn't willing to deal with the travel and parking costs involved and definitely didn't want the two or three hours of unpaid overtime each evening that they expected. I ended up handing all my files/phone numbers etc over to my supervisor's desk as he spent my last week there out on site or visiting relatives rather than working. On the bright side, I did get quite a good stock of stories from the job as well as some experience in how to make a swift exit.
                                Three other people also quit whilst I was there, all rather swiftly. One girl quit the day after I started, having only been there for a week, the woman hired to replace her quit at lunchtime on her first day and the man hired to replace her lasted for nearly a fortnight.

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