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  • Hammertime

    Title will make sense in a moment folks.

    This tale is something that was told to be during my training class here. It had slipped my mind until recently, for reason unknown. This incident is the cause of a change in our policy in handling stubborn customers, that policy being don't quote policy unless it is from the pages of the published catalog. The story goes as follows.

    A customer calls in to return a large plastic kennel, you know, the ones you usually see dogs in when they are going to a plane ride. I'm talking a big one. Now, because of their size and the fact the only way they can break down is by nesting the top in the bottom, they are awkward to ship. Hence, it costs ALOT of money. I'm talking upwards of $100+ for the larger sizes. Shipping alone, not the $100+ cost of the item. And our advertised return policy is within 30 days, any reason, but call us for return authprozation. This is because we have to tell the customer if they are paying for shipping it back to us or not. For most cases the customer has to pay for the shipping of the item back, but we have no restocking fee, which usually makes people happy. When the item arrives damaged, we pay for shipping back, or replace the item free of charge.

    So the conversation went along the usual lines until this point.

    SC: Guesses anyone?
    CW: Coworker.

    CW: Your return number is 123456, and you would be responsible for shipping this back to us.
    SC: What do you mean I would be responsible for shipping this back, it cost me nearly $120 to get it shipped to me. You mean I have to pay that again!?
    CW: I do apologize miss, but that is the policy. The customer is responsible for shipping items back for returns unless the item arrived damaged.
    SC: *Rusty gears turn* Can you hold on a moment?
    CW: Ofcourse miss.

    At this point the cust puts the phone down, and my CW can here her walk away, and then come back shortly afterward. Then this happens.

    SC: *WHAM WHAM WHAM* Alright, it looks like the kennel arrived broken. Pick this up.
    CW: Did... Did you just hit that with a hammer?
    SC: No. It came this way. Now pick this up.
    CW: I'm sorry miss, but I know I just heard you hit that with a hammer. We can't pick that up and we won't take that back at all now.
    SC: I want your manager!

    Well, from here it goes to manager. Manager talks to CW, CW explains what happened. Manager tells SC she is not getting anything. SC goes... well... SC on the manager. In the end, in training it is stressed to NEVER quote policy to the customer unless it is coming from the catalog itself.

    Points to the SC for thinking creatively though.

  • #2


    Many points for ingenuity.
    Unseen but seeing
    oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
    There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
    3rd shift needs love, too
    RIP, mo bhrionglóid

    Comment


    • #3
      Quoth BeckySunshine View Post

      Many points for ingenuity.
      But zero points for brains for hitting it within earshot of the phone!
      A PSA, if I may, as well as another.

      Comment


      • #4
        If I were the SC, I'd have at least hit "mute" or unplugged the handset first!
        I was not hired to respond to those voices.

        Comment


        • #5
          You know, this would REALLY piss me off if that happened to me (that is, if a customer "broke" something in order to circumvent a fee). This is just the PERFECT illustration of classic SC: they assume that the employee is stupid and won't be able to see through their scam, when in fact it is the SC who is stupid for thinking that 1) they are being original and 2) that anyone would fall for such an old trick.

          Gah.
          "We guard the souls in heaven; we don't horse-trade them!" Samandrial in Supernatural

          RIP Plaidman.

          Comment


          • #6
            I'm just surprised they could figure out the function of a hammer so quickly, hence points for creativity.

            Comment


            • #7
              Quoth Xieg View Post
              I'm just surprised they could figure out the function of a hammer so quickly, hence points for creativity.
              It has no moving parts, nor does it require batteries, hence the speed of discovery of use, just be glad he didn't try and clean his teeth with it!
              A PSA, if I may, as well as another.

              Comment


              • #8
                Quoth crazylegs View Post
                It has no moving parts, nor does it require batteries, hence the speed of discovery of use, just be glad he didn't try and clean his teeth with it!
                That might hurt.

                Same goes for trying to wash her hair with one . . .

                Just when you think humanity can't sink any lower, someone went and grabbed a shovel and started digging again.
                Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

                Comment


                • #9
                  Wow!!!

                  Please tell me, in the grand tradition of Sucky Managers, that your boss didn't give in and do it just to shut her up.
                  "So, if you wanna put places like that outta business, just stop being so rock-chewingly stupid." ~ Raudf, 9/19/13

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    ok, now even if they didn't do that within earshot of the phone... don't they realize that hammers leave a very distinctive pattern when you hit something with it... and i don't think that anyone would believe that employees are randomly hitting merchandise with hammers before shipping it.
                    If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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                    • #11
                      Quoth smileyeagle1021 View Post
                      ok, now even if they didn't do that within earshot of the phone... don't they realize that hammers leave a very distinctive pattern when you hit something with it... and i don't think that anyone would believe that employees are randomly hitting merchandise with hammers before shipping it.
                      Ah, but an SC believe it!
                      "So, if you wanna put places like that outta business, just stop being so rock-chewingly stupid." ~ Raudf, 9/19/13

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth Xieg View Post
                        SC: What do you mean I would be responsible for shipping this back, it cost me nearly $120 to get it shipped to me. You mean I have to pay that again!?
                        This is something that customers never understand. I didn't either....until I got an explanation at VSC. S&H is a contract with blah company to ship the item from them to the customer. When the customer receives it, the contract is completed. That's why you have to pay to ship it back (unless it's defective, naturally)!

                        I guess that the problem lies in the fact that it makes sense....and we all know what that means!
                        It's floating wicker propelled by fire!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Quoth crazylegs View Post
                          But zero points for brains for hitting it within earshot of the phone!
                          Well, true, but I thought that would go without saying.
                          Unseen but seeing
                          oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
                          There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
                          3rd shift needs love, too
                          RIP, mo bhrionglóid

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth Peppergirl View Post
                            Please tell me, in the grand tradition of Sucky Managers, that your boss didn't give in and do it just to shut her up.
                            Cust was told, in short, to go suck an egg.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Quoth Xieg View Post
                              Cust was told, in short, to go suck an egg.
                              Pwned!

                              I don't have an anger problem! I have an idiot problem!-Hank Hill

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