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  • The Remoteless Wonder

    I get a call from one of the rooms. This gentleman wants to know how to change the station on his tv. I let him know that the satellite boxes are attached to the right side of the dresser in the back - and to aim the remote in that direction.

    Come to find out he has no clue how to operate a tv remote. The interaction starts out nice enough but soon spins into utter chaos. I am trying to explain the buttons and he is incapable of looking at his remote and following along. I tell him there is a guide button and a channel select button. He is mad and tells me "you mean the most important button on the remote is tiny?" Every time I try and offer up directions he tells me that he is the one asking questions and why can't I just answer his questions.

    I ask him if I could come to the room and help him - nope. I once again try to explain the concept of changing channels and he is talking down to me and just being rude. I let him know that I can't help him if he won't listen so the call is over.

    He storms the lobby now and wants to know why I hung up. So now I play nice nice and show him on the lobby tv what to do - and he starts again with the questions.

    All in all it took me over 20 minutes to show him how to simply change a channel.

  • #2
    Mom

    Sounds like my mom. At night you just had to point in the general direction of the TV to control it. But when full sunlight was streaming into the room (about 4 hours each day) you needed to point the control directly at the bottom left-hand side of the TV to control it from across the room.

    I lost count the number of time my mom claimed the remote was not working even when she pointed it at the TV, only to come up to find the control she claimed was not working to be pointed 45 degrees away from the TV. You could tell her this to her face and she would still claim she was pointing it okay.

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    • #3
      Where are you? I need to tell the rest home that my Dad has decarcerated himself again.
      I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
      Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
      Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

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      • #4
        Huh. When I was a kid, my parents had an even simpler way to change the channel. They told me or my brother to get up and change the dial "...while you're up."


        ...I wasn't up. I was snuggled into a pillow with my dear friends Mr PiBB and Mme Ruffles.
        Last edited by EricKei; 05-20-2019, 12:19 AM.
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        • #5
          Quoth earl colby pottinger View Post
          I lost count the number of time my mom claimed the remote was not working even when she pointed it at the TV, only to come up to find the control she claimed was not working to be pointed 45 degrees away from the TV. You could tell her this to her face and she would still claim she was pointing it okay.
          Semantic battle. For the 20ish hours the remote is pointed, enough, at the tv to work. What it isn't is pointed at the sensor.

          I can point my rmote directly away, and slightly below, the sensor and have it work in all conditions
          ludo ergo sum

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          • #6
            However

            Quoth rvdammit View Post
            Semantic battle. For the 20ish hours the remote is pointed, enough, at the tv to work. What it isn't is pointed at the sensor.

            I can point my rmote directly away, and slightly below, the sensor and have it work in all conditions
            Even that was partly my mom's fault. Before we moved in my mom had the house remodeled. She wanted windows (there was originally only a small one), she got WINDOWS! It was just short of a sun-room, when I said the sunlight streamed in, I mean it really streamed in. The poor infrared red beam of the remote really had a major problem being seen by the TV.

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            • #7
              There are times my remote works better if I point it back over my shoulder to bounce the signal off the wall than if I point it forward at the device.
              "Crazy may always be open for business, but on the full moon, it has buy one get one free specials." - WishfulSpirit

              "Sometimes customers remind me of zombies, but I'm pretty sure that zombies are smarter." - MelindaJoy77

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              • #8
                Quoth Seanette View Post
                There are times my remote works better if I point it back over my shoulder to bounce the signal off the wall than if I point it forward at the device.
                Are the batteries slightly loose in the compartment? If they are then padding the compartment slightly might help.
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                • #9
                  Hmm, may have to check that.
                  "Crazy may always be open for business, but on the full moon, it has buy one get one free specials." - WishfulSpirit

                  "Sometimes customers remind me of zombies, but I'm pretty sure that zombies are smarter." - MelindaJoy77

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                  • #10
                    See shit like this is why I got my technotarded mom a remote where she can hold just one button down and speak what she wants into it. That way I don’t have to hear her yelling for me across the house when I just got comfortable “How do I get channel -blank-?” “How do I change the channel?” “What does this button do?” Its great because you don’t have to be precise in how you word things either. I can say “guide” “channels” or “change the channel” “play -blank- channel”. I have even set voice commands into it so when the technotards (looking at you mom) say something like “gimmie flippy channel screen” it will bring up the guide since apparently one syllable words are to hard to remember for one who grew up on a typewriter.
                    Don’t worry about what I’m up to. Worry about why you are worried about what I’m up to.

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                    • #11
                      I think my dad came to visit you, lol.

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                      • #12
                        Ha Ha Ha

                        Quoth AkaiKitsune View Post
                        See shit like this is why I got my technotarded mom a remote where she can hold just one button down and speak what she wants into it. That way I don’t have to hear her yelling for me across the house when I just got comfortable “How do I get channel -blank-?” “How do I change the channel?” “What does this button do?” Its great because you don’t have to be precise in how you word things either. I can say “guide” “channels” or “change the channel” “play -blank- channel”. I have even set voice commands into it so when the technotards (looking at you mom) say something like “gimmie flippy channel screen” it will bring up the guide since apparently one syllable words are to hard to remember for one who grew up on a typewriter.
                        You think voice command will always solve the problem? DREAM ON.

                        We had on OnStar with voice command in the car. It would work 95% of the time for me all the time. I just asked for a function, and it would work.

                        Then my mom would try. And it would fail almost every time. The moment she started to talk to the machine she would stress out and her voice tone would go up and down in just one sentence. She would stutter and repeat words, in other words saying a simple sentence became torture to listen to, and what is worse she would insist she was doing nothing different even as you hear how much she was messing up her words.

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                        • #13
                          This used to be a huge problem for guests, I had a laminated "how to watch TV" set of instructions. The smarter and more advanced degrees the guest had, the lower likelihood they could figure out the remotes (plural). I tried a universal remote, didn't help. Never solved the problem.

                          Nowadays I give them the passcode to the house wifi and they watch their stuff on their phone or laptop. Problem solved.
                          Some days, it's just not worth chewing through the restraints...
                          TASTE THE LIME JELLO OF DEFEAT! -Gravekeeper

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                          • #14
                            I'm so glad I'm not technoretarded. I am the IT person in my house. I've even got it setup now so I can beam my phone to a number of Bluetooth devices in the house and the car.
                            https://www.youtube.com/user/HedgeTV
                            Great YouTube channel check it out!

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                            • #15
                              I bet this is the sort of remote the guy in the OP is used to:

                              AKA a *real* "clicker"
                              Goofy music!
                              Old tech junk!

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