lovely realizations

[Seshat]

I'm another one whose family is not the genetic family.

You only have to look at people like Kanalah (sorry, dear) to see that sometimes the family you're born into just isn't worth considering as family.


My best friend's mother is family.
My best friend (duh) is family. My husband is family.
We had another bit of family over last night - a young man (well, about my age so not so 'young' anymore) and his 20-month-old daughter. She's our niece, but has no genetic relationship to us.
Several other friends are effectively family.

My niece and nephew are family, mostly because they're innocent of anything their parents and grandparents have done to me. I stay in touch with my blood-family for their sake.

Maybe it's sad. Maybe it isn't.

I prefer not to live life on 'should' but on 'is'. It's very easy to say you 'should' get on well with your blood-family. It's sometimes not possible, and occasionally dangerous, to try to do so.
If you can build a good, solid foundation of friend-family; do it. That's what IS. Blood-family is just 'should'.

Fuck 'should'. It can take a flying leap.


Edit to add: People who have a good relationship with their blood family are very, very fortunate. Don't get me wrong. And I feel blessed to have shared life with my maternal grandmother. She was an amazing person, and in many ways similar to yours - treating everyone from the CEO to the janitor as a person, and baking cookies with her grandchildren and so on.
But while one may try to treat everyone as a person; that doesn't mean they're a person you can get on with for the kind of extended relationship the word 'family' implies.

[Midnight12]

well should implies on my part that i show respect and hold my tongue where as they don't and often ignore me. both of us could do better at contacting each other but i chose to not give two shits about it

hugs to Kanalah and Seshat

i am glad that i reconnected with my two sisters and biological father. the rest can take a flying leap.

sorry this is short - for me at least- both hands are wrapped up to the palms and is tough to type. i fell in the church parking lot when leaving the funeral and after not properly wrapping my hands or pushing myself to try and catch up on commissions i caved and iced both wrists and got new ace bandage wraps...it does not help that i see minor pain/discomfort as punishment or penance...i promise to not remove them all weekend

[Food Lady]

Hugs to you, Midnight. My heart hurts for you.

[Midnight12]

doing much better. still wrapping my wrists at night while i sleep and have my hands away from my body so as not to have discomfort in the morning

taking it slow with crafts so as not to add strain. having fun now. still dealing with the grief but its less knowing that granny is not in pain and that she can rest. saddened by the fact the family fell appart that quickly. however...as cold as it may sound it keeps me sane, its not my problem. their drama isn't affecting me, and i don't have a part to play nor do i want to, i was doing fine as i was with or without them. and granny was doing fine too all things considered.


just happy to be here still and spend time with my daughter as silly as it sounds

[ArcticChicken]

just happy to be here still and spend time with my daughter as silly as it sounds

Nothing silly about that.