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Yea, well, not everyone can travel by bubble!

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  • Yea, well, not everyone can travel by bubble!

    Hi all!
    Long time lurker... you know the drill. I'll keep the intro simple: I live in a little-big city on the east coast & handle ticketing for a really awesome stage-play theater. Despite minor customer suckage, I actually love my job.

    My first story is from previous employment, where I handled ticketing for a large company of arts organizations. The call was for our "Broadway" series - touring companies would come in to do the big ticket musicals... like "Wicked."

    SC: Lady NotSoBright on a cell phone
    ME: Fabulously over-qualified CSR

    Me: (Opening spiel) How may I-
    SC: -You sold my husband the wrong tickets for Wicked and you need to fix this now!
    Me: (And so it begins) Okay... Let me look up your information so I can find out how to help.
    SC: My name is ____, and you people are horrible for screwing this up!
    Me...) Zip code?
    SC: I can't believe you would do this! He went to the main website and everything! Zip is ___. Incompetant*grumble* ignorant*mutter*

    blah blah blah...

    I eventually pull up an online order, as in done on the Internet, with no interaction from anyone in the call center. It was placed about two months before and tickets were mailed that day. Again, no human interaction til today...

    Me: Okay, so I see an online order for today's matinee performance-
    SC: I'm at the theater and they won't accept my tickets. What is wrong with your company?
    Me: Ma'am, the order is definitely for today. What do your tickets say?
    SC: (grumble,grumble) Tickets say (our company, theater, ALL SALES ARE FINAL, Wicked the Muscial at 2 pm.
    Me: ...Okay...
    SC: And we're at the Gershwin now and they won't take them!

    The Gershwin is in New York.

    She's calling me ten minutes before the show starts.

    In Philadelphia.



    Me: Uhm, okay...

    SC: I sent my husband online to buy tickets for New York and he screwed up. You have to fix this now.

    Me: Uhm, well, Ma'am, we're not part of the same company. If he purchased tickets for our theater then the tickets are for our performances. I'm afraid there's nothing we can do...

    SC: ... WHAT?!? @#$%^&*! This needs to be @#$%^&* fixed NOW! How @#$%^& imcompentant can your people be!! @#$%^!!!!!eleventy!!!one!!!!

    I pulled up the website while she ranted. Of course, you chose which city you wanted, and you would go to the local theater's ticketing site. And the location information is everywhere. Every page. Every ticket. EVERYWHERE.

    Me: *burning willpower to not laugh* Um, Ma'am, your husband couldn't have bought the tickets without being reminded several times that they were for the Philadelphia performance. The order was placed (several months before) and the tickets went out that day. How long ago did you receive your tickets?

    SCcue whining) But we're Heeeeere! This was supposed to be our girl's day out & he took care of everything! Can't you call the Gershwin and make them take these???

    Me: I'm afraid not - They're non-transferable & non-refundable(as you just read ya twit!). *trying to sound meek* How many weeks ago did they arrive?

    SCover friends cursing in the background) What? I, um, a few weeks ago, I guess... but I didn't check them-why would I check them?!?

    Me: (cue *Aww Shucks* voice) Gosh, well, I mean, we could have tried to do something had you contacted us a few weeks ago, but as you know all sales are final, and once the performance is over there's really nothing we can do...

    SC: (Explaining to her friends) Ok. The people here have allowed us standing room seats until intermission so we can sort this out. We have to go. But I'm warning you, I will dispute this on my credit card the moment I get out of here.

    Me: Okay, well I'm sorry I can't help you. (Yeah right!) Enjoy the show!

    Did I mention the order was for box seats? At $150 a pop? And the company is really tough on post-performance whining, even to card companies...
    I never did get to find out if they ever got their money back, but Gods, if I could have been a fly on the wall when she got home that night...

  • #2
    Y-you mean the customers are expected to read? Ah! The horror!

    Checking tickets is for peasants. For box seats you should've not only checked the purchase immediately after the transaction and made all corrections, but delivered them to her on the finest silk pillow. Shame on you!

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    • #3
      AND four white wild stallions....never forget them.

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      • #4
        On the bright side, they chose a good play. I saw it a few months ago on Broadway. And the tickets were actually for the same state that we were in at the time.
        "All I've ever learned from love was how to shoot somebody who out-drew ya"

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        • #5
          Quoth Crescent Cat View Post
          Checking tickets is for peasants.
          I've some lottery customers who think that. Look, I try to do it how you tell me to, but I'm only human, plus I'm pretty new at this. If you check your tickets I can fix it and get you the ones you wanted, but once you walk away? That's on you.

          I also have trouble not saying "Look, instead of spending the $60 on lottery give it to me instead, and if I get struck by lightning, I'll give you everything I own."
          The High Priest is an Illusion!

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          • #6
            I have the same issues with people who book on our online travel tool.

            There are at least 7 screens asking you to confirm, and reconfirm and reconfirm your flight times/dates/cities/names, etc.

            Yet it's always the COMPUTER or 'YOU GUYS' who picked the wrong flights, or managed to spell their OWN DAMNED NAMES wrong.

            Funny, that.
            "So, if you wanna put places like that outta business, just stop being so rock-chewingly stupid." ~ Raudf, 9/19/13

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            • #7
              As a sidenote...

              Second fave call from that show:


              Them: "Yeah, I need tickets for Wicked (pronounced WikT, as in having a wick)"

              Me: "Uhm, do you mean Wick-Ed?"

              Them: "Yeah. Gimme the best seats ya got."

              (Fast forward to end of transaction)

              Me: "Okay your all set!"

              Them: "Great! Now, what's this show about?"

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              • #8
                A for effort and absolute F in litercy.

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                • #9
                  I'm jealous. Wicked is coming to town in January and I really want to take the hubby for our anniversary and the little sis cuz she wants to see it really badly. But alas, can't afford even crappy seats.
                  I am no longer of capable of the emotion you humans call “compassion”. Though I can feign it in exchange for an hourly wage. (Gravekeeper)

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                  • #10
                    One of my companies sites had (in the same font/color):
                    You must click continue and select a location for this to be posted


                    About 1/3 of the people posting said "how was I supposed to know???" despite it being posted twice on the page... once at the top, and once right by the button that said "continue" right under their post.

                    I had to make it larger, and the button larger so they'd "see" it.

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                    • #11
                      Before I went to grocery store land, I worked in ticketing. As a ticketing sys admin, which meant I was also responsible for tickets purchased online. I cannot even count the number of times some SC called to complain about their online order, that they did! That they made the mistakes in. Wrong date, wrong venue, wrong name, wrong address, I have heard it all.

                      My personal favorite was the guy who insisted we charged the wrong credit card! OMG, you entered it yourself. We didn't do a thing. But he still wanted the tickets free for his "inconvenience." Wow. Just wow.

                      Oh and I love Wicked. I'm all about Defying Gravity.
                      The key to customer service is accepting the following:
                      Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.

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                      • #12
                        When I was the stage manager, I would have a 5 minute lock down on the doors. We had sold out shows for our community christmas production.

                        I had two ushers on each door, and BIG FREAKING SIGNS stating that if you had missed the start of the show, you MUST wait until and Usher lets you in or intermission.

                        One night we had a party of FIFTEEN arrive 20 minutes into the first act and the ushers had come come and collect both myself and the director (lucky the stage door was only a few steps from the entrance they were at) to convince them that they were A. NOT getting their money back and B were going to shut the fuck up and wait. I was so stressed/pissed I do believe I said something like

                        "Just because your group is to LAZY and self important, to consider the actors and audience does NOT mean you are going to RUIN this performance that people have killed themselves over for three months. Your tickets state doors close 10 minutes before curtain, we started the play 5 minutes late waiting for you! Now sit down and SHUT up or I will have you removed."

                        they did, Im very scary when I furious!
                        the diretor basically told them the same thing after I went back to my cue box, she even made them wait until intermission.
                        I vowed never to be a stage manager again, I swear I lost 5 years of my life doing that show!
                        I wasnt put on this earth to make you feel like a man ~ Mary Bertone

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                        • #13
                          Quoth jedimaster91 View Post
                          I'm jealous. Wicked is coming to town in January and I really want to take the hubby for our anniversary and the little sis cuz she wants to see it really badly. But alas, can't afford even crappy seats.
                          Check the theater's "Rush" policies. Many theaters will have discounted deals for leftover seats - for example, one theater would sell half-price tickets two hours before showtime.

                          I think the touring company had a "lottery," where you could sign up for $30 tickets depending on how many they had... Ask the theater(not necesarily the ticketing broker) and see if you can't schedule a weekday out(weekends are usually the toughest...)

                          Quoth Kiwi View Post
                          I vowed never to be a stage manager again, I swear I lost 5 years of my life doing that show!

                          I've been a stage manager. I know your pain.
                          Last edited by Broomjockey; 11-13-2008, 09:34 PM. Reason: multi-quote

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                          • #14
                            Quoth Aethian View Post
                            A for effort and absolute F in litercy.
                            Only an F? I think you're being overly generous. I'd have given them a *Q* for literacy
                            Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. --Enzo Ferrari

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