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Had this gem a few days ago, just got around to posting it here. Customer is having troubles with his premium channels (HBO and Starz, yay Starz!) Tiling, freezing, blank screen. This has been going on (recorded by call-log notes) for about six days. Oh yea, and he's 44 days past due and is going to be soft disconnected at 10AM the next morning...
SC: Credit Guy
Me: Your SNR reading hero!
Me: Thank you for calling Awesome Cable Company. My name is Jack, how may I help you?
SC: Yea, I'm calling to request credit for my premium channels. I've been having issues with them for a week now. I pay over $200 a month, and I haven't been able to watch my pay channels for a week now.
Me: Yes sir, I do see you've reported this issue last Friday. I also see that we need to schedule a tech to get the low signal issue cleared up and get this fixed. When its fixed, then we can credit you.
SC: But you won't send a tech because I'm a little past due (the amount, including subscriptions, VOD, and PPV items was close to $380.00.) I need to get a credit for this issue.
Me: Again, sir, we will credit this once we get it fixed, and as the previous reps have told you, you need to bring your account current, then we'll roll a tech and get it credited. Do you want to make a payment so I can roll a tech today?
SC: But I pay all this money and my services won't work, and you won't give me a credit!
Me: Again, sir, we will credit it when it's fixed. We don't want to short you any of your credit. But we won't roll a truck until you account is current, and that's when we can credit you.
SC: Here I am, paying all this money, and you won't credit me.
Me (done with this guy): Sir, you haven't paid us in over two and a half months. You haven't given us any money for us to credit. You asking for a credit right now is like going into Target and demanding a refund on something you haven't bought. Now, do you want to make a payment now?
SC: I'll have to call back later.
SC: Credit Guy
Me: Your SNR reading hero!
Me: Thank you for calling Awesome Cable Company. My name is Jack, how may I help you?
SC: Yea, I'm calling to request credit for my premium channels. I've been having issues with them for a week now. I pay over $200 a month, and I haven't been able to watch my pay channels for a week now.
Me: Yes sir, I do see you've reported this issue last Friday. I also see that we need to schedule a tech to get the low signal issue cleared up and get this fixed. When its fixed, then we can credit you.
SC: But you won't send a tech because I'm a little past due (the amount, including subscriptions, VOD, and PPV items was close to $380.00.) I need to get a credit for this issue.
Me: Again, sir, we will credit this once we get it fixed, and as the previous reps have told you, you need to bring your account current, then we'll roll a tech and get it credited. Do you want to make a payment so I can roll a tech today?
SC: But I pay all this money and my services won't work, and you won't give me a credit!
Me: Again, sir, we will credit it when it's fixed. We don't want to short you any of your credit. But we won't roll a truck until you account is current, and that's when we can credit you.
SC: Here I am, paying all this money, and you won't credit me.
Me (done with this guy): Sir, you haven't paid us in over two and a half months. You haven't given us any money for us to credit. You asking for a credit right now is like going into Target and demanding a refund on something you haven't bought. Now, do you want to make a payment now?
SC: I'll have to call back later.
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