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PRESENTING: "ASSET PROTECTION"

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  • PRESENTING: "ASSET PROTECTION"

    I say it like this: ASS-et Protection because I'm petty and childish.


    Soooo, security got renamed. Whenever someone says "AP to ___" I'm thinking "Oh, the Associated Press is here. How odd." NOT, "Security is coming."


    THIS IS A STUPID IDEA. Plus, "AP" does not sound scary like "Security" does.

    I looked asset protection up on google and got Target's corporate website:

    https://corporate.target.com/careers...oss-prevention


    So now we're imitating lowly Target? The scandal!
    Last edited by flyonthewall; 11-02-2015, 01:11 AM.

  • #2
    Oh yes. It's fun when corporate changes things for apparently random reasons. Our managers are actually called Leaders. Because any customer will come up asking for a "Leader" and not be utterly confused if you page for one instead of the manager they asked for. Which we... don't do. MoD or [Name] gets paged for still.

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    • #3
      Quoth flyonthewall View Post
      THIS IS A STUPID IDEA. Plus, "AP" does not sound scary like "Security" does.
      I'm not so sure it's a "stupid idea". But I can be convinced.

      You're right in the "AP" doesn't sound scary like "Security" does. That's probably by design.

      "Security" raises eyebrows (and possibly awareness) for any perps that might be trying to steal stuff. "AP" doesn't, I wouldn't think (until word gets out that AP = Security), and would therefore make it easier to catch anyone trying to commit a thievery.
      Skilled programmers aren't cheap. Cheap programmers aren't skilled.

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      • #4
        Quoth Strathclyde View Post
        Oh yes. It's fun when corporate changes things for apparently random reasons. Our managers are actually called Leaders. Because any customer will come up asking for a "Leader" and not be utterly confused if you page for one instead of the manager they asked for. Which we... don't do. MoD or [Name] gets paged for still.
        Yeah, I don't get calling managers "Leaders".

        It's not like we're going to make alien contact and have the cliche "Take me to your leader" play out in front of us...
        Skilled programmers aren't cheap. Cheap programmers aren't skilled.

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        • #5
          Place I used to work at (call centre) called supervisors Team Leaders, but still called managers managers

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          • #6
            AP is Accounts Payable not Security.
            Figers are vicious I tell ya. They crawl up your leg and steal your belly button lint.

            I'm a case study.

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            • #7
              Here at WallyWorld, they're already called that, but their job goes beyond what you think of when someone says security. Basically their job is to deal with anything that impacts profits, but profit protection/PP doesn't sound good. They're main stuff is theft and safety, but they're involved in more than that.
              Seph
              Taur10
              "You're supposed to be the head of covert intelligence. Right now, I'm not seeing a hell of a lot of intelligence. Covert, overt, or otherwise!"-Lochley, B5, A View from the Gallery

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              • #8
                Some of us call them Ass Protection because it's all about protecting the store's/company's ass (Shithead has tried to blame lapses/problems on peons before).
                "I am quite confident that I do exist."
                "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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                • #9
                  Quoth mjr View Post
                  I'm not so sure it's a "stupid idea". But I can be convinced.

                  You're right in the "AP" doesn't sound scary like "Security" does. That's probably by design.

                  "Security" raises eyebrows (and possibly awareness) for any perps that might be trying to steal stuff. "AP" doesn't, I wouldn't think (until word gets out that AP = Security), and would therefore make it easier to catch anyone trying to commit a thievery.
                  But we already have code words and phrases for such incidents..

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Dreamstalker View Post
                    Some of us call them Ass Protection because it's all about protecting the store's/company's ass.
                    Some of them probably call themselves that too.

                    I know the ones I worked with had that kind of sense of humor. Of course, they were just called by our store number, as in, "S# to Electronics." Managers would also answer to that, in case Loss Prevention wasn't available. Yeah, it was "Loss Prevention." Not "Asset Protection," probably because someone like me was in the marketing talk about that and giggled. You know that giggle, the one that says, "This is soooo sewer, but it'd be rude to actually say that, but I can't help but giggle."
                    If I make no sense, I apologize. I'm constantly interrupted by an actual toddler.

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                    • #11
                      Quoth Javarod View Post
                      Here at WallyWorld, they're already called that, but their job goes beyond what you think of when someone says security. Basically their job is to deal with anything that impacts profits, but profit protection/PP doesn't sound good. They're main stuff is theft and safety, but they're involved in more than that.
                      LP at the swamp is pretty much the same. Besides theft and safety she may get involved in paperwork/receiving if necessary.

                      She also has her own code name, but I haven't heard it used in quite a while. Instead, everyone else and I just call her office number since that's usually where she is.
                      Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                      "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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