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  • #16
    LOL The big red button for screaming and hitting really hard and the remote control for those discreet moments when you don't want people knowing you're using it. Geez, I could have done with one of these when I worked in a call centre! The thing is we need to protect your fragile hearing when person on the other end is screaming in agony...
    Idiot-proofing myself since 1997

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    • #17
      Well, obviously when you hit the button, it would also activate a sound suppressor to cut the volume on any noises that go over a certain decibel level.

      ^-.-^
      Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

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      • #18
        Quoth Andara Bledin View Post
        Well, obviously when you hit the button, it would also activate a sound suppressor to cut the volume on any noises that go over a certain decibel level.

        ^-.-^
        You know, I actually thought of that after I last logged off. D'oh!
        Idiot-proofing myself since 1997

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        • #19
          Quoth blas87 View Post
          How about tear gas for Black Friday?!
          Wouldn't even slow them down. Heck, some of them would use the cover to steal from other people's carts. What they need is flying noise activated sledgehammers of doom. That way, when people are screaming about something, the FNASHOD would come over, start beating on whatever was in the area, knocking the screamers unconscious, or breaking the merchandise they were fighting over, thus making sure no one gets it as reward for their prickishness.
          Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

          http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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          • #20
            Quoth blas87 View Post
            How about tear gas for Black Friday?!

            If the store gets too out of control, if women are beating each other and wrestling over *insert newest musthave toy here*, if customers are practically looting and rioting....
            I'd suggest this

            What it does is it gives you a burning sensation when you're within its radius. Awesome concept and more effective IMO. They showed this on Future Weapons a while back.
            The Grand Galactic Inquisitor hears all and sees all.

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            • #21
              Quoth ArenaBoy View Post
              I'd suggest this

              What it does is it gives you a burning sensation when you're within its radius. Awesome concept and more effective IMO. They showed this on Future Weapons a while back.
              I heard that was banned under international law, for being "cruel and unusual punishment". There's an exception for SCs though.

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              • #22
                Edible Hat: Checked Google and signs point to no. Granted when used wrong it could be a torture device but the company that produces these are obviously not going to sell them to a country with a questionable human rights record.
                The Grand Galactic Inquisitor hears all and sees all.

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                • #23
                  Moonlight - I really hope you get your idiot stick as you clearly need it, but :

                  Quoth Moonlight View Post
                  People a foot and a half taller than me asking me to reach things down. Yes, I know the shelf is high but they can reach it perfectly well and I'm only 5'2".
                  I do that I regularly ask the man in one of the shops near I work to lift down stuff for me even though I'm taller.

                  I ask because I struggle to reach and worry I may damage something. He finds it harder to reach but he's comfortable just climbing on things. I think it makes sense to ask if you can't reach easily - and if the person you're asking can't reach either (a) they may be able to get a member of staff who can reach, (b) they may have access to a ladder or step, and if all else fails they will be responsible if something does get damaged.

                  I don't think I deserve to be hit with an idiot stick. At least for that. The other sucky customers you described do though.

                  Victoria J

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                  • #24
                    Quoth Victoria J View Post
                    Moonlight - I really hope you get your idiot stick as you clearly need it, but :



                    I do that I regularly ask the man in one of the shops near I work to lift down stuff for me even though I'm taller.

                    I ask because I struggle to reach and worry I may damage something. He finds it harder to reach but he's comfortable just climbing on things. I think it makes sense to ask if you can't reach easily - and if the person you're asking can't reach either (a) they may be able to get a member of staff who can reach, (b) they may have access to a ladder or step, and if all else fails they will be responsible if something does get damaged.

                    I don't think I deserve to be hit with an idiot stick. At least for that. The other sucky customers you described do though.

                    Victoria J
                    No no Victoria, I certainly wouldn't hit you with an idiot stick! You're nice and polite about it. It's the ones that are complete idiots about it that I object to. And it's only crappy handbags on our high shelf so they can't do loads of damage! Hold on, no, they probably can. *sigh*
                    Idiot-proofing myself since 1997

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                    • #25
                      I'm glad I won't be being hit with an idiot stick (for that - there are plenty of other reasons for people to hit me with an idiot stick unfortunately). If surveyed I will definitely tell Santa you've been good.

                      I do tend to be extremely paranoid about damaging things in shops - being very disaster prone. (My best ever was at my place of work where I tried to open a door I was sure was unlocked...and ended up ripping the entire handle and locked lock bodily of the door. I don't know my own strength, or destructive power, but my manager couldn't believe it either and decided to assume it was broken before I got there).

                      Victoria J

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                      • #26
                        Quoth Moonlight View Post
                        People a foot and a half taller than me asking me to reach things down. Yes, I know the shelf is high but they can reach it perfectly well and I'm only 5'2".
                        Oh, I know that situation all too well.

                        And then I have to go all over the store to find something to stand on, while the customer stands there all impatient-like.
                        Unseen but seeing
                        oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
                        There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
                        3rd shift needs love, too
                        RIP, mo bhrionglóid

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