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Don't Judge A Book by it's Cover

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  • #16
    Quoth Captain Trips View Post
    waitaminit....

    The car he wanted towed was blocking the hunting trail? Trail, not road? As in something you WALK on?

    Why the frell couldn't he just WALK AROUND THE FRIGGIN' CAR?
    My guess is that he COULD walk around it, but he's a Speshul Snowflake (and lazy to boot). He wanted to DRIVE to the point where the trail became impassable to vehicles before he started walking, and he couldn't drive around the other vehicle.

    I wonder, was the parked car deliberately left there by someone from the DCNR in order to keep people from driving through the way the caller wanted to do?

    I'd LOVE to see the speshul snowflake drive down the trail, only to either get stuck, or have someone from the DCNR drop a "dangerously weakened" tree across the trail (or park a car on it) so he can't get OUT. Remember that the DNCR has the final say on whether someone (i.e. the tow truck driver) is ALLOWED to drive on the trail to retrieve the idiot's car (and I'm sure Argabarga and his co-workers wouldn't risk getting stuck by driving where vehicles aren't supposed to go). How much per hour does it cost to "wet lease" (i.e. including pilot) a chopper with enough capacity to hoist a car out of such a situation?
    Any fool can piss on the floor. It takes a talented SC to shit on the ceiling.

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    • #17
      Funny, I recall some years ago some dummy had decided to drive his big 4x4 truck across a dry lake bed. Only to find out "Dry" was a subjective term. True, they'd (the DCNR) drained the lake to fix the dam and do some dredging, and, while the water was gone, that left behind mud.

      LOTS of mud.

      Mud that would be, mud-like, for a long time. Lake beds don't dry out to the point they become substitutes for solid roads overnight, being the bottom of the lake means the ground gets a tad bit waterlogged and it'll be a while before that all leeches out.

      Not as far as dummy was concerned, his truck has 4x4, it can handle some mud! He got about 100 yards from "shore" and then got completely mired in the soup.

      He waded back to dry(er) land, and watched as his truck slowly went in up to it's rooftops in the muck, only his light bar with his off-road lamps was showing.

      He called us for a tow, and didn't tell us what he'd done, until we got there, we assumed he'd just broke down in the parking lot by the boat launch. We got on scene and told him not only could we not get him out of there, but now the DCNR would have to be notified, as he was most assuredly now tresspassing on their property.

      The DCNR arrived, went out to look at the truck, and noticed it was burping rainbows up through the mud. Like most hilbilly trucks, this one had a propensity to leak oil all over the place... and now that it was submerged, all that loose oil was beading to the surface, since oil and water don't mix.

      They wrote him citations for tresspassing, illegal dumping (his polluting the lake) AND had to call in a crane service that could reach the truck from a reasonable distance without the crane going under as well, only when it was unstuck and dropped someplace drier, did we get to tow it, to impound, until he paid the thousand-some dollars they fined him. They were a bit generous in that they declined to cite him for not having a boating license or full compliment of PFD's on board.
      - They say nothing good happens at 2AM, they're right, I happen at 2AM.

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      • #18
        Some cookbook covers can be pretty racy. This one comes to mind. It doesn't hurt that I love berries.

        Quoth the lawsmeister View Post
        Unless its Nigella's latest book
        Sadly, none of her book covers come even close to that description. I checked,

        Though if you do find that image, please, by all means, do let me know, okay?

        "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
        Still A Customer."

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        • #19
          Quoth Jester View Post

          Sadly, none of her book covers come even close to that description. I checked,

          Though if you do find that image, please, by all means, do let me know, okay?
          Sorry Jester, no book cover.
          But, I give you: Nigella Talks Dirty - (slightly NSFW)
          Be Nicer To Retail Workers 2K18, also known as: stop being an incredibly shitty human to people just doing their job.

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          • #20
            Quoth Kheldarson View Post
            ....I'm so tempted to self-publish a cookbook with that type of cover now. Just to contradict this statement
            You're too late. Giada has that motif pinned already.

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