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First story-sharing post, some collected tales from the midway. I can't speak for every carnival game in the world, but the games at my location are not rigged. Chance games are pure luck, and skill games actually require a bit of skill to win (and if I like the customer enough, I might share a tip or two to help them out).
Duck Pond Background
The duck pond is our one-and-only winner every time game. For some reason, despite the guaranteed toy, it attracts suck like there's no tomorrow. (I have many collected stories about the pond).
The pond has three levels of prizes: small, medium, and large. Chances are that you'll probably get a small, since the majority of the ducks are marked for smalls. I won't disclose the odds, but suffice to say, there are ducks for mediums and larges in the pond (and no, I can't tell by watching them float by which ones they are anymore than you can). You pay, you pick out ONE duck, and you get a prize according to what's on the bottom of the duck. You're guaranteed to always get at least a small (and you can trade up for the bigger ones too).
Now, one of the rules we have is that nobody is allowed to tip/look at the bottoms of the ducks (it's cheating!). Doesn't matter if you intend to play or not. You play, you may only pick up one duck. Otherwise, keep your hands off. This is all clearly marked on our rules board too.
[/end background]
So, with that out of the way, here are a few stories of suck, midway style.
Get your hands off of my ducks!
MS: middle school boys
Me:
My thoughts in italics.
Group of middle school-aged boys come up to the duck pond. One hands me money, plays, gets his toy.
A family with a little kid comes up, and as I'm helping them, the MS boys are on the side starting to tip the ducks.
Me: Don't tip the ducks.
MS: -blank stare-
While the little kid is playing, the MS boys are tipping the ducks. One of them finds the duck for the large.
Me: Do not touch the ducks. That's cheating.
I take the duck and put it into the back of the pond. Little kid picks, and I turn my back to get the kid's prize. MS boys shove more money at me, and the one who is playing now is watching one of the ducks carefully.
.
MS2: -picks a specific duck just a little too quickly- Look, I got a large.
Me: -skeptical- Uh-huh. I think you guys cheated.
MS2: Not before I paid.
Me: I think you should pick a different one.
MS2: No. I paid, now you have to give me the prize.
Me: Why you snobby little... Fine*.
* - I was a bit stuck there, as I hadn't physically seen them cheat (even though I know they did), so if I didn't give it to them, and they complained, I could get in trouble... mostly because of the manager who was on duty that day. If it had been anyone else, I wouldn't have cared and would have refused it.
The MS boys give me more money. Three of them cluster up near the end, quickly tipping every duck that comes around to the front. I -should- chase them away from the pond to stop them, but now I have an opportunity to have a little fun with this. I position myself so that I can clearly see the colors on the ducks as they tip them. I see them tip a duck for the large.
Without saying anything, and before the boys can say anything to their friend who's playing, I pick the duck up and shuffle it into the back of the pond, moving a few other ducks around it too, so that it isn't easy to track where I put it. You would think they'd knock it off there, but they keep persisting. I see them tip a duck for the medium prize next.
MS2: -very quickly- Hey, hey! Pick this one, this one right here!
Me: Do. Not. Touch. My. Ducks. -grabs the duck in question as the kid playing is also reaching for it, and tosses it out of the game-
Boys wound up with a small, and didn't come back.
Wonder where the kid learned it from
Kid1: old enough to know better
Kid2: just a supporting role in this story, not related to SM or kid1
SM: sucky mom
Me
SM comes up and pays for her kid to play. I have another, younger kid already standing there to play (kid2), who is with a different family. So there's a kid on either side of me, and I'm watching for them to pick. Kid1 picks a duck, it's a small. I call it, and point out the size prize she gets. Kid2 still hasn't picked, so I'm waiting on her now. Out of the corner of my eye, I see kid1 putting the duck she picked back in the water, and tipping a few ducks. She picks up another one, and steps back, holding it. Kid2 finally picks, gets a small, gets her prize, and that family leaves. I turn back around to kid1 (I can kind of see SM out of my peripheral vision while talking to kid1)
Kid1: Look, I got a medium.
Me: Uh-huh... -smiling- and didn't you pick out a small first?
Kid1: Well, I... uh... I... Ye.... yes.... -crocodile tears-
Me: -smiles- I'm sorry, but that's how the game works. You already picked a small, so that's what you win.
During the conversation, I see SM pick up a duck. Note that there are now other customers waiting to play too (means she really isn't getting away with anything, because I don't want to deal with the inevitable "but you let her do it!")
SM hands me money for herself to play, and immediately presents me with the duck she's been holding. It's marked for a large.
Me: Sorry, but it doesn't count unless you pay first before you pick it out of the water.
SM: You're shitting me! That's not fair. I only picked one! I didn't look at any others.
Me: Nope, sorry. Doesn't count.
SM: Fine!
She threw the duck back into the pond and tried to grab it out again... she missed and grabbed a small.
(Ok, I will admit that maybe I could have been nice and told her that before I took the money... but to be fair, I would have given her money back and let her walk away with nothing if she had asked, or at least said that she didn't want to play anymore.
Then again, I have adults do this ALL THE TIME.
I'm not going to make this shot
We have two basketball games - a short-shot (that I'm pretty good at), and one with full-height hoops... I think the distance we require players to stand is a three-point shot (or at least, a customer once told me that's what it was). The trick to both is to "swish" the ball in - if you hit the backboard, odds are highly likely that the ball will bounce off and you won't make it in. These both also have the long hoop-to-ground nets on them. I like to leave a couple of balls in the nets after the shots are made, so that it's visible that it is possible to make it.
This one isn't so much suck as it is silly... at the full-size basketball game:
BB: Basketball guy
Me
BB: Can I get a free shot?
Me: No, sorry man. Can't do it.
BB: Awww, come on. Just one shot. I don't want a prize or nothing.
Me: Nope. We're not allowed to give free shots.
BB: Alright then, let's see you make a shot.
Me: I suck at basketball.
BB: Aww, come on.
Me: I'm not going to make it in anyway.
BB: Because the hoops are too small?
Me: No. The balls fit just fine. I suck at basketball.
BB: Come on. Prove it then.
Me: -humors him, throws ball, doesn't even get close to one of the hoops... wound up throwing it inbetween two of them-
BB: See, I knew it. It's impossible to make.
Me: No, it's not. I'm just not good at basketball. Anyway, -motions to nets- other players have made the shot in. The balls are still in the nets.
BB: Yeah right. You just put them in from the bottom of the net*.
* - Even if I had, there's no way I would have been able to get the balls as far up into the net as they were from the ground... but, you know... whatever.
I also get asked at this game at least 20 times a day when I'm there "is that a regulation hoop?" - I have no idea. I don't play basketball. The ball fits through it just fine, so what does it matter?
Who shouldn't have let the kid play?
Ahh, the water gun race. I love it (most of the time). Being a race, we require 2 players to start a game. The only time I can run a "just us" race for a family is if there is -nobody- else around waiting to play. I cannot turn customers away if they want to jump in, and if I do a private game for one family, then I have to do it for every family that was watching, or we get into a big mess of "You let them do it!!!" (It's not just a personal thing on my part... it's a rule from management that I have to follow).
On the not-turning-people-away thing, this means I can't even stop an adult from joining in a race against a group of kids. 'Tis times like that I wish the game was rigged, but whatever.
Anyway, onto the story:
LK: little kid
AM: angry mom
Me
Early in the morning, still slow. LK and AM are standing across the midway watching me. LK runs over (alone) to ask me about the game. There's noone else around to play at the moment.
LK: How do you play?
Me: -explains game, tells her I need 2 people and how much it costs-
LK runs back to AM and comes back, alone, with money. I was expecting her to come back with AM and have the two of them play... because that's what most parents do.
Me: Ok, but you have to wait from someone to play against. I need two people.
LK: Why?
Me: It's a race.
LK: Ohhhhh
LK runs back to AM again, comes back and goes to hand me the money for just herself again.
Me: You still need to wait for another player. I need two people, or we can't have a race.
During this, a random adult comes up to play. LK sees this and hands me her money. I make sure she really wants to play and that she knows she's racing against the other person. She does. So now I've got a race between the LK, and the adult. AM is still across the midway, a fair distance away, just watching.
I run the race, and the adult wins (of course... it's rare that a little kid wins against adults. It happens from time to time, when the kid is a sharp-shooter, but most of them have trouble aiming for the target on their own, or they start watching their thing go up, and not paying attention to their aim). Adult gets their prize and leaves. LK had run back to AM, and now AM is stomping up to me.
AM: Why did you let her play against an adult?!
Me: I need two play-
AM: That's not what I asked! Why did you let her play against adults?
Me: She couldn't play alo-
AM: That's not fair! She wasn't going to win against adults! You shouldn't of let her play!
Me: -thought but not said- No, YOU shouldn't have let your kid play
Me: -blunt- I needed two players.
AM stomps off.
Duck Pond Background
The duck pond is our one-and-only winner every time game. For some reason, despite the guaranteed toy, it attracts suck like there's no tomorrow. (I have many collected stories about the pond).
The pond has three levels of prizes: small, medium, and large. Chances are that you'll probably get a small, since the majority of the ducks are marked for smalls. I won't disclose the odds, but suffice to say, there are ducks for mediums and larges in the pond (and no, I can't tell by watching them float by which ones they are anymore than you can). You pay, you pick out ONE duck, and you get a prize according to what's on the bottom of the duck. You're guaranteed to always get at least a small (and you can trade up for the bigger ones too).
Now, one of the rules we have is that nobody is allowed to tip/look at the bottoms of the ducks (it's cheating!). Doesn't matter if you intend to play or not. You play, you may only pick up one duck. Otherwise, keep your hands off. This is all clearly marked on our rules board too.
[/end background]
So, with that out of the way, here are a few stories of suck, midway style.
Get your hands off of my ducks!
MS: middle school boys
Me:
My thoughts in italics.
Group of middle school-aged boys come up to the duck pond. One hands me money, plays, gets his toy.
A family with a little kid comes up, and as I'm helping them, the MS boys are on the side starting to tip the ducks.
Me: Don't tip the ducks.
MS: -blank stare-
While the little kid is playing, the MS boys are tipping the ducks. One of them finds the duck for the large.
Me: Do not touch the ducks. That's cheating.
I take the duck and put it into the back of the pond. Little kid picks, and I turn my back to get the kid's prize. MS boys shove more money at me, and the one who is playing now is watching one of the ducks carefully.
.
MS2: -picks a specific duck just a little too quickly- Look, I got a large.
Me: -skeptical- Uh-huh. I think you guys cheated.
MS2: Not before I paid.
Me: I think you should pick a different one.
MS2: No. I paid, now you have to give me the prize.
Me: Why you snobby little... Fine*.
* - I was a bit stuck there, as I hadn't physically seen them cheat (even though I know they did), so if I didn't give it to them, and they complained, I could get in trouble... mostly because of the manager who was on duty that day. If it had been anyone else, I wouldn't have cared and would have refused it.
The MS boys give me more money. Three of them cluster up near the end, quickly tipping every duck that comes around to the front. I -should- chase them away from the pond to stop them, but now I have an opportunity to have a little fun with this. I position myself so that I can clearly see the colors on the ducks as they tip them. I see them tip a duck for the large.
Without saying anything, and before the boys can say anything to their friend who's playing, I pick the duck up and shuffle it into the back of the pond, moving a few other ducks around it too, so that it isn't easy to track where I put it. You would think they'd knock it off there, but they keep persisting. I see them tip a duck for the medium prize next.
MS2: -very quickly- Hey, hey! Pick this one, this one right here!
Me: Do. Not. Touch. My. Ducks. -grabs the duck in question as the kid playing is also reaching for it, and tosses it out of the game-
Boys wound up with a small, and didn't come back.
Wonder where the kid learned it from
Kid1: old enough to know better
Kid2: just a supporting role in this story, not related to SM or kid1
SM: sucky mom
Me
SM comes up and pays for her kid to play. I have another, younger kid already standing there to play (kid2), who is with a different family. So there's a kid on either side of me, and I'm watching for them to pick. Kid1 picks a duck, it's a small. I call it, and point out the size prize she gets. Kid2 still hasn't picked, so I'm waiting on her now. Out of the corner of my eye, I see kid1 putting the duck she picked back in the water, and tipping a few ducks. She picks up another one, and steps back, holding it. Kid2 finally picks, gets a small, gets her prize, and that family leaves. I turn back around to kid1 (I can kind of see SM out of my peripheral vision while talking to kid1)
Kid1: Look, I got a medium.
Me: Uh-huh... -smiling- and didn't you pick out a small first?
Kid1: Well, I... uh... I... Ye.... yes.... -crocodile tears-
Me: -smiles- I'm sorry, but that's how the game works. You already picked a small, so that's what you win.
During the conversation, I see SM pick up a duck. Note that there are now other customers waiting to play too (means she really isn't getting away with anything, because I don't want to deal with the inevitable "but you let her do it!")
SM hands me money for herself to play, and immediately presents me with the duck she's been holding. It's marked for a large.
Me: Sorry, but it doesn't count unless you pay first before you pick it out of the water.
SM: You're shitting me! That's not fair. I only picked one! I didn't look at any others.
Me: Nope, sorry. Doesn't count.
SM: Fine!
She threw the duck back into the pond and tried to grab it out again... she missed and grabbed a small.
(Ok, I will admit that maybe I could have been nice and told her that before I took the money... but to be fair, I would have given her money back and let her walk away with nothing if she had asked, or at least said that she didn't want to play anymore.
Then again, I have adults do this ALL THE TIME.
I'm not going to make this shot
We have two basketball games - a short-shot (that I'm pretty good at), and one with full-height hoops... I think the distance we require players to stand is a three-point shot (or at least, a customer once told me that's what it was). The trick to both is to "swish" the ball in - if you hit the backboard, odds are highly likely that the ball will bounce off and you won't make it in. These both also have the long hoop-to-ground nets on them. I like to leave a couple of balls in the nets after the shots are made, so that it's visible that it is possible to make it.
This one isn't so much suck as it is silly... at the full-size basketball game:
BB: Basketball guy
Me
BB: Can I get a free shot?
Me: No, sorry man. Can't do it.
BB: Awww, come on. Just one shot. I don't want a prize or nothing.
Me: Nope. We're not allowed to give free shots.
BB: Alright then, let's see you make a shot.
Me: I suck at basketball.
BB: Aww, come on.
Me: I'm not going to make it in anyway.
BB: Because the hoops are too small?
Me: No. The balls fit just fine. I suck at basketball.
BB: Come on. Prove it then.
Me: -humors him, throws ball, doesn't even get close to one of the hoops... wound up throwing it inbetween two of them-
BB: See, I knew it. It's impossible to make.
Me: No, it's not. I'm just not good at basketball. Anyway, -motions to nets- other players have made the shot in. The balls are still in the nets.
BB: Yeah right. You just put them in from the bottom of the net*.
* - Even if I had, there's no way I would have been able to get the balls as far up into the net as they were from the ground... but, you know... whatever.
I also get asked at this game at least 20 times a day when I'm there "is that a regulation hoop?" - I have no idea. I don't play basketball. The ball fits through it just fine, so what does it matter?
Who shouldn't have let the kid play?
Ahh, the water gun race. I love it (most of the time). Being a race, we require 2 players to start a game. The only time I can run a "just us" race for a family is if there is -nobody- else around waiting to play. I cannot turn customers away if they want to jump in, and if I do a private game for one family, then I have to do it for every family that was watching, or we get into a big mess of "You let them do it!!!" (It's not just a personal thing on my part... it's a rule from management that I have to follow).
On the not-turning-people-away thing, this means I can't even stop an adult from joining in a race against a group of kids. 'Tis times like that I wish the game was rigged, but whatever.
Anyway, onto the story:
LK: little kid
AM: angry mom
Me
Early in the morning, still slow. LK and AM are standing across the midway watching me. LK runs over (alone) to ask me about the game. There's noone else around to play at the moment.
LK: How do you play?
Me: -explains game, tells her I need 2 people and how much it costs-
LK runs back to AM and comes back, alone, with money. I was expecting her to come back with AM and have the two of them play... because that's what most parents do.
Me: Ok, but you have to wait from someone to play against. I need two people.
LK: Why?
Me: It's a race.
LK: Ohhhhh
LK runs back to AM again, comes back and goes to hand me the money for just herself again.
Me: You still need to wait for another player. I need two people, or we can't have a race.
During this, a random adult comes up to play. LK sees this and hands me her money. I make sure she really wants to play and that she knows she's racing against the other person. She does. So now I've got a race between the LK, and the adult. AM is still across the midway, a fair distance away, just watching.
I run the race, and the adult wins (of course... it's rare that a little kid wins against adults. It happens from time to time, when the kid is a sharp-shooter, but most of them have trouble aiming for the target on their own, or they start watching their thing go up, and not paying attention to their aim). Adult gets their prize and leaves. LK had run back to AM, and now AM is stomping up to me.
AM: Why did you let her play against an adult?!
Me: I need two play-
AM: That's not what I asked! Why did you let her play against adults?
Me: She couldn't play alo-
AM: That's not fair! She wasn't going to win against adults! You shouldn't of let her play!
Me: -thought but not said- No, YOU shouldn't have let your kid play
Me: -blunt- I needed two players.
AM stomps off.
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