Tweet
Because I'm finding myself and my boyfriend separated for a month over winter break and I can already tell it's going to the hardest month I've had all year, and I'm shocked by how hard I'm taking this. I've been in a long-distance relationship before, but I guess the difference is that it was an online relationship and we didn't have any physical contact to miss. My boyfriend and I have been basically living together for 3 months - we're college freshmen, so admittedly we're like stupid kids in a candy store when it comes to doing insane things that you could never do in your parents' house. Like living with your significant other.
I'm used to falling asleep in his arms every night and waking up together, and it's physically impossible for me to get to sleep without him next to me, short of exhausting myself til sleep is inevitable.
I miss his compliments and his hugs and his smile. I miss the way he puts my arms up around his neck, puts his arms around my waist and lifts me off my feet for no real reason - and the way that usually turns into spontaneous slow dancing to no music. I miss his hands and how they make mine feel so small. I miss sleeping in his arms or up against his back.
I miss all the mundane things we do together. I miss watching stupid Youtube videos with him and renting movies on the weekends. I miss staying up late just talking in the dark on weeknights and being tired the next morning in class. I miss waking up on Sunday mornings and watching cartoons instead of getting out of bed. I even miss the nights he keeps me awake playing COD or Pokemon.
I've been sleeping in the shirt that I wore the last night we slept together because it smells like him, but it's starting to smell more like boy stank and less like boy smell so I washed it today and now it smells like boring laundry.
I decided to make a winter break calendar so I had a tangible layout of the days to look at and say "hey, that's not so many, I can do this." But once I had the days blocked out, I looked at it and thought "that's so many, I can't do this".
I don't just have to get through Christmas. I have to get through Christmas and New Year's and the first half of January.
All this is made worse by the fact that I didn't get my job back over break, so I'm stuck in my parents' house all month; and all my friends are out-of-state so I don't have anyone to hang out with and distract myself. I don't have a car and I live roughly an hour walk out of town so I literally have nothing to do and I'm sure this is not helping my situation at all.
I text him and talk to him whenever I can. Visiting him is impossible because he's over 10 hours away and I can't do that right now. So I guess that's all I can do. This is going to be such a long month.
Anyone else feel like venting? There have got to be others feeling lonely right now.
I'm used to falling asleep in his arms every night and waking up together, and it's physically impossible for me to get to sleep without him next to me, short of exhausting myself til sleep is inevitable.
I miss his compliments and his hugs and his smile. I miss the way he puts my arms up around his neck, puts his arms around my waist and lifts me off my feet for no real reason - and the way that usually turns into spontaneous slow dancing to no music. I miss his hands and how they make mine feel so small. I miss sleeping in his arms or up against his back.
I miss all the mundane things we do together. I miss watching stupid Youtube videos with him and renting movies on the weekends. I miss staying up late just talking in the dark on weeknights and being tired the next morning in class. I miss waking up on Sunday mornings and watching cartoons instead of getting out of bed. I even miss the nights he keeps me awake playing COD or Pokemon.
I've been sleeping in the shirt that I wore the last night we slept together because it smells like him, but it's starting to smell more like boy stank and less like boy smell so I washed it today and now it smells like boring laundry.
I decided to make a winter break calendar so I had a tangible layout of the days to look at and say "hey, that's not so many, I can do this." But once I had the days blocked out, I looked at it and thought "that's so many, I can't do this".
I don't just have to get through Christmas. I have to get through Christmas and New Year's and the first half of January.
All this is made worse by the fact that I didn't get my job back over break, so I'm stuck in my parents' house all month; and all my friends are out-of-state so I don't have anyone to hang out with and distract myself. I don't have a car and I live roughly an hour walk out of town so I literally have nothing to do and I'm sure this is not helping my situation at all.
I text him and talk to him whenever I can. Visiting him is impossible because he's over 10 hours away and I can't do that right now. So I guess that's all I can do. This is going to be such a long month.
Anyone else feel like venting? There have got to be others feeling lonely right now.
Comment