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  #141  
Old 10-16-2010, 01:46 AM
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MoonCat MoonCat is offline
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Half the world is starving to death, while the other half sits on a pile of cash making bullets.

(paraphrased but that's almost exact) -Patricia A. McKillip, from Stepping From The Shadows
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When you start at zero, everything's progress.

  #142  
Old 10-18-2010, 02:53 PM
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Lace Neil Singer Lace Neil Singer is offline
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Blackadder: Oh, incidentally, Baldrick - actors are very superstitious. On no account mention the word *Macbeth* this evening, alright?
Baldrick: Why not?
Blackadder: It brings them bad luck and it makes them very unhappy.
Baldrick: Oh, so you won't be mentioning it either?
Blackadder: No... well, not very often.


Melchett: You used to have a rabbit. Beautiful little thing. Do you remember?
George: Flossy.
Melchett: That's right. Flossy. Do you remember what happened to Flossy?
George: You shot him.
Melchett: That's right. It was the kindest thing to do after he'd been run over by that car.
...George: By YOUR car, sir.
Melchett: Yes, by my car. But even that was an act of mercy when you remember that that dog had been set on him.
George: YOUR dog, sir.


Percy: Do not despair! For I have some small savings
carefully harvested from my weekly allowance, set aside against my
frail old age. By lucky hap, it is just over a thousand, methinks, and
for years has been hidden beyond the wit of any thief, in an old sock...
Percy & Blackadder: ...under the squeaky floorboard...
...Percy, Blackadder & Baldrick: ...behind the kitchen dresser.
Percy: [smiles uneasily] You've seen it, then.
Blackadder: Seen it, pinched it, spent it! And the same goes
for the two farthings Baldrick thinks he’s got hidden inside that
mouldy potato.
Baldrick: Oh, bloody hell!
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  #143  
Old 10-19-2010, 08:00 PM
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MoonCat MoonCat is offline
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My favorite Blackadder quote was in the WWI episode where he was going to be executed. Another soldier commented on how calm he seemed.

Soldier: I've got to admire your balls!
Blackadder (after a pause): Perhaps later.
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  #144  
Old 10-27-2010, 01:19 AM
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BookstoreEscapee BookstoreEscapee is offline
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"Well, I must go. I hope we shall meet again. I will give you some free advice, though."
"Will it cost me anything?"
"What? I just said it was free!" said Miss Tick.
"Yes, but my father said that free advice often turns out to be expensive," said Tiffany.
Miss Tick sniffed. "You could say this advice is priceless," she said. "Are you listening?"
"Yes," said Tiffany.
"Good. Now... if you trust in yourself..."
"Yes?"
"...and believe in your dreams..."
"Yes?"
"...and follow your star..." Miss Tick went on.
"Yes?"
"...you'll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learninig things and weren't so lazy. Good-bye."


from The Wee Free Men, Terry Pratchett
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I don't go in for ancient wisdom
I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

  #145  
Old 12-18-2010, 04:36 AM
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HappyFun Ball HappyFun Ball is offline
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Posts: 408
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"Well, I object to all this sex on the television, I mean, I keep falling off!"
~Monty Python

"ARGH. Doorbell, am in bra and panties with wet hair. Suddenly hate the guest, have had to slave for 2 days and now they'll all swarm in demanding food like cuckoos. Feel like opening the doors and yelling "Oh, go fuck yourselves!""
~Bridget Jones


"Life is like a box of chocolates- It's dark, sticky and most of it sucks anyways."

"Some people are like Slinkys, they don't really have a purpose but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs."

"I collect church collapses , recreationaly. Did you see the recent one in Siciliy? Marvelous! The entire facade fell on sixty-five grandmothers at a special Mass. Was that evil? If so, who did it? If He's up there, He just loves it. Typhoid and swans, it all comes from the same place."

~Hannibal Lecter

"For me, socks are a lot like sex, tons of it about but I never seem to be getting any."

- Hugh Laurie as the Prince Regent in Black Adder the Third.


"Inside me is a thin woman screaming to get out, but chocolate shuts that bitch up!"

"I'm gonna kick your ass!"

-Hank Hill


"Good news everyone!"

-Professor Hubert Farnsworth in Futurama (Most of the time, it was not good news)


"Give a man fire and he's warm for a day, Set a man on fire and he's warm for life."

"Honesty may be the best policy but insanity is an even better defense."


"PMS is a time of the month where Women act like Men do everyday."
~ Robert Heinlein

"He hates these cans! Stay away from the cans!!"
~ Navin Johnson

"Without evil there can be no good, so it must be good to be evil sometimes."
~ Satan

"Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love."
~ Woody Allen

"So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure,
How amazingly unlikely is your birth,
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space,'Cause there's bugger all down here on Earth"
~ Monty Python


"What was it we had for dinner?"
"Well, we had a choice, steak or fish"
"Yes, I remember now, I had lasagna"
~ Airplane!

Last edited by HappyFun Ball; 12-18-2010 at 07:25 AM.

  #146  
Old 12-21-2010, 09:40 PM
Daemonmonkey Daemonmonkey is offline
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I think there is a world market for maybe five computers, - IBM Chairman Thomas J. Watson 1943

This is the most stable operating system ever made - Bill Gates at a symposium presenting new, all-improved Windows 95, seconds before bluescreening ...

  #147  
Old 02-12-2011, 12:47 AM
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Jack T. Chance Jack T. Chance is offline
Knows where his towel is!
 
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Location: The Entitlement Whore Capital of the World™!
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Here's one of my all-time favorite quotes from the pages of Green Lantern...
Quote:
Quoth Sinestro
In blackest day...
In
brightest night...
Beware your fears made into light...
Let those who try to stop what's right...
burn like my power...
SINESTRO'S MIGHT!


--Sinestro's oath
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--StanFlouride

  #148  
Old 02-25-2011, 08:38 PM
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lolad lolad is offline
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Posts: 32
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Today, my friend told me he was going to go put small pieces of plastic in his eyes. I will never merely "put in my contacts" again. MLIA



Doctor: I think you’ll find that I’m universally recognized as a mature and responsible adult.
[shows psychic paper]
Kazran: It’s just a lot of wavy lines.
Doctor: Yeah, it shorted out. Finally, a lie too big.
- The Doctor and Kazran, Doctor Who Christmas Special 2010.





"I wish everyone was a sci-fi geek because then there would be no
violence in the world. There'd be no wars. There'd only be people
e-mailing each other"
- Claudia Christian



It would be like buying Monolopy and just playing with the thimble.
Oh I've done that... No I'm just kidding
- Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes, Jay and Silent Bob Get Old


11 Cheers for Binary!
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It's like trying to get laid by showing a girl your resume.
Look, I was good at Biology and Woodwork.
So I know where stuff is and I'm good with my hands.

- Dan, The Gruen Transfer

  #149  
Old 03-05-2011, 10:45 PM
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Jack T. Chance Jack T. Chance is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: The Entitlement Whore Capital of the World™!
Posts: 251
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Secretary-General Rikki Stormgren: "This is serious."

The Overlord known as Karellen: "My dear Rikki, it's only by not taking the human race seriously that I retain what fragments of my once considerable mental powers I still possess!"

--From Childhood's End, by Arthur C. Clarke
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"Eventually one outgrows the fairy tales of childhood, belief in Santa and the Easter Bunny, and believing that SCs are even capable of imagining themselves in our position."
--StanFlouride

  #150  
Old 03-12-2011, 10:55 PM
Jack T. Chance's Avatar
Jack T. Chance Jack T. Chance is offline
Knows where his towel is!
 
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Location: The Entitlement Whore Capital of the World™!
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Exclamation

Conan: "I have known many gods. He who denies them is as blind as he who trusts them too deeply. I seek not beyond death. It may be the blackness averred by the Nemedian skeptics, or Crom's realm of ice and cloud, or the snowy plains and vaulted halls of the Nordheimer's Valhalla. I know not, nor do I care. Let me live deep while I live; let me know the rich juices of red meat and stinging wine on my palate, the hot embrace of white arms, the mad exultation of battle when the blue blades flame and crimson, and I am content. Let teachers and priests and philosophers brood over questions of reality and illusion. I know this: if life is illusion, then I am no less an illusion, and being thus, the illusion is real to me. I live, I burn with life, I love, I slay, and am content."
-- From"Queen of the Black Coast" by Robert E. Howard
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"Eventually one outgrows the fairy tales of childhood, belief in Santa and the Easter Bunny, and believing that SCs are even capable of imagining themselves in our position."
--StanFlouride
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