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No Rooms Means No Rooms!

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  • No Rooms Means No Rooms!

    I work the midnight shift at one of the smaller hotels in town, as a front desk clerk, and got the following call the other night:

    Me: Hello, Hotel, Tshawne speaking
    SC (Stupid Customer): Hi, do you have any rooms for tonight?
    Me: I'm sorry, we're totally full.
    SC: No cancelations?
    Me: No, sorry.

    OMG, what part of we're full didn't you understand? If we had a cancelation, then we would have a room, wouldn't we?
    God must really like stupid people; he made so many!

  • #2
    Yeah, I never could get why "no" became "maybe".
    Time! Time! Time is what turns kittens into cats.

    Don't teach me a lesson; all I learn is that you are an asshole.

    I wish porn had subtitles.

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    • #3
      Quoth depechemodefan View Post
      Yeah, I never could get why "no" became "maybe".
      remember in SC land "no" just means you aren't willing to try hard enough
      If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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      • #4
        I think some people think hotels are like theatres and they have a few rooms on reserve like house tickets or something - or at least that is what I think when I'm trying to be kind. Usually, I'm just trying hard not to laugh in their faces.

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        • #5
          If you're new to working in a hotel, trust me, you're going to get that A LOT. After a while, you can start to tell people that you actually DO have room, but you wanted to make sure the person you spoke with wasn't a Zombie first. (Did this several times in NC and NM, it was great.)
          Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

          Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

          Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

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          • #6
            Don't you know that your supposed to get out your tools and quickly build an extra room for them?

            Oh yeah don't forget to furnish it after you build it either or they really will be mad then.

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            • #7
              My favorites are the ones who tell you to throw someone out of their room, and give them that room. Since they're such wonderful people, we want to keep them around.

              On that note, I hate when we walk people to other hotels...for those who don't travel often, hotels ALWAYS oversell, since it's a guarantee that some of the reservations won't show up. But, if MOST of them show up, people get walked to other hotels in the area. This is a good thing, actually, since you get a night or two comped...but people flip out as if it were the end of the world.

              People, we are giving you a free hotel room for at least 1 night. You can stand to take a free taxi (since the hotel's paying for it) to your temporary hotel...
              "That's too bad. Hospitals aren't fun to fight through."
              "What IS fun to fight through?"
              "Gardens. Electronics shops. Antique stores, but only if they're classy."

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              • #8
                My stepmom, A, works at the motel her parents own, and I hear lots of fun stories from her. Our town is very touristy in the summer, so it gets very busy. One lady called recently and wanted to stay in a certain room for a week or so. That room was going to be booked later on in said week, and A told her that and offered another room. The lady said, "Can't you move them?"
                "Let our mercy as deep as the Feitas and our authority as powerful as the Sun be revealed to the entire world."

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                • #9
                  Quoth KhirasHY View Post
                  *snip*hotels ALWAYS oversell*snip*
                  not entirely true... if they are like the hotel I do the night audit for we never oversell, even knowing that some people won't show because then we can charge the other hotels around us out the butt when they have to walk a guest (you want a room tonight... oh so sad, it looks like if you want a room the rate will be (insert number higher than rack)... oh don't like that rate, maybe you shouldn't have overbooked )
                  If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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                  • #10
                    You mean you can't use some chairs and spare bedding to make a tent in the lobby?

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                    • #11
                      One of the other front desk clerks actually had a man ask, after being told there were no rooms, if he could sleep in the basement. Sure, if you don't mind being constantly woken up by housekeeping, since that's whwere the laundry room is, lol!
                      God must really like stupid people; he made so many!

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                      • #12
                        When I worked at a hotel, a few times we actually let some people just park their car in the lot and sleep there. When tourist season hits around here, it hits hard. Every hotel from Greenville-Spartanburg, SC to Knoxville, TN was completely full.
                        Drive it like it's a county car.

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                        • #13
                          Quoth hauntedheadnc View Post
                          When I worked at a hotel, a few times we actually let some people just park their car in the lot and sleep there. When tourist season hits around here, it hits hard. Every hotel from Greenville-Spartanburg, SC to Knoxville, TN was completely full.
                          I hear that! When I worked at The Carolina in NC, I would always have people asking if they can just park and sleep in their vehicles! Several even paid me for it! I was all because it was a small hotel and there was nowhere in the computer system to input their money!
                          Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

                          Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

                          Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth Evil Queen View Post
                            because it was a small hotel and there was nowhere in the computer system to input their money!
                            Fines-Misc

                            An excellent catch-all that can handle stupidity tax and SC tax.
                            The Rich keep getting richer because they keep doing what it was that made them rich. Ditto the Poor.
                            "Hy kan tell dey is schmot qvestions, dey is makink my head hurt."
                            Hoc spatio locantur.

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                            • #15
                              Quoth Evil Queen View Post
                              I hear that! When I worked at The Carolina in NC, I would always have people asking if they can just park and sleep in their vehicles! Several even paid me for it! I was all because it was a small hotel and there was nowhere in the computer system to input their money!
                              oh yeah, where I work is similar... we can only post charges to rooms... we have no way of accepting a payment without it first being billed to a room.
                              If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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