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An introduction: I am a police officer for an agency of my state government. I get used for a lot of miscellaneous tasks, only about half of which are conventional policework. Sometimes I'm a glorified security guard, sometimes I'm actually out on patrol in a squad car, sometimes they have me fill in as a receptionist at government buildings, sometimes I'm directing traffic, some days I'm working at the morgue signing corpses in and out, other days I'm guarding VIP's.
However, the task I've come to hate the most is manning the metal detector checkpoint at one certain building.
(Technically I hate working at the morgue even more, but that's something I have to do much more rarely, I end up working the metal detector at least 1 day a week).
Our state government has a handful of public buildings that have full metal detector checkpoints for all non-government employees. Our state DMV headquarters is one of them.
I hate working there. Let me explain why. For 8 hours, I get people who come in, and have a wide variety of sucky reactions.
1. Immediately acting like it's the airport. We don't care about your bottled water, or your nail files, or anything like that. I'm just there to make sure somebody doesn't bring a gun inside (well, LEO's with credentials can). We get plenty of people every day that the moment they see a metal detector immediately start taking off their sneakers, throwing away their bottles of water, and fishing around for their ID, or saying they'll have to go back to their car and drop stuff off because they have nail clippers in their purse. I'm not with the TSA, folks. I don't even bother to count how many times I tell people they don't need to remove their shoes or throw away beverages every day.
2. Paper doesn't set off a metal detector! I can't believe how many times a day I have to say this. It was 4 times yesterday. Somehow people think that the manilla folder they are carrying with the papers they need to file will set off the metal detector. They ask "will this set it off?" more times than you'd think, or they'll be sure to empty out their pockets of all paper and envelopes before going through the detector.
3. This isn't a secret government conspiracy scanner! Also, at least once a day I get somebody who takes out a huge roll of money and puts it in the tray. It's normally at least a little suspicious why somebody is carrying that much cash, but since people are often going to the DMV to pay fees or taxes or such it actually isn't suspicious there. However, the fact that people feel the need to take paper money out of their pockets bewilders me. I asked somebody last week why he did this. He explained to me that it was so that "the government" couldn't scan the money as he went through and know how much he had, which is also why he doesn't keep any money in banks. It's a simple freaking metal detector, it can't scan for money, and even if it could I know it only has a power cord, no data connection (and it's definitely old enough to predate wi-fi).
4. Ignore the metal detector and keep on walking like it's not there. I get at least one of these a day. This person barges in through the front doors, yammering on a cell phone (often holding a purse with lots of clunky metal fittings). Free hint: cell phones will set off a metal detector every time. I try to get the person's attention as they are approaching the detector, the walk straight through, it sounds an alarm, and I am going to the other side of the detector to stop them from going any further.
Without fail, this person will complain to the person on the other end about something making a loud alarm, and when I stop the person from walking any further, they'll tell the person they are talking to that the "security guard" or "rent a cop" or "mall cop" is being hostile/rude to them by stopping them. Never mind I'm wearing the uniform, badge and insignia of a state government agency, carrying a sidearm (and handcuffs and pepper spray), they just think "rent a cop". When I was a rookie, I used to try to set the record straight by politely letting them know I was a sworn LEO of $Agency and my badge number, but this usually lead to formal complaints against me by these people, since they cared more about complaining about me than learning they were wrong.
It takes a lot of willpower and professionalism to deal with that, let me tell you. They are always in a huff when I make them go back through, and go through proper security screening.
5. "But I work for the government!" That buildings policies are clear, if your badge won't let you in the employee entrance (which is only for DMV employees whose ID badges will let them in), you have to go through the public entrance, which involves going through security. A dozen or more times per day we'll get somebody entering the public entrance, flashing a state government ID badge for a different department, and being offended at having to go through security. If you had unrestricted access to the building, your badge would let you in.
6. This isn't an X-ray machine. Every so often I'll get somebody who refuses to go through the metal detector on the grounds that they don't want to be subjected to lots of radiation. I try to explain that a metal detector doesn't emit lots of radiation, but they'll tell me they know X-ray machines are dangerous, so they don't want to walk through an X-ray machine. This isn't that scanner corridor from the old version of Total Recall.
7. "Do I have to go through that?!?"/"What do I do now?!" I'll get this one a few times a day. Somebody will just walk in the front door, and while standing in the doorway just stand there, stunned and silent for a few seconds, staring at the metal detector before asking if it's optional to go through, or just plain not having any idea what to do. When they find out that they have to go through a checkpoint, they'll either turn around and leave without saying a word, or be completely bewildered and have to be walked through how to go through a metal detector ("Yes, Ma'am, keys will set off a metal detector, please put them in this tray."). I'm going to assume at least some of the people who saw the checkpoint and just left immediately were carrying illegal weapons, so it does it's job. Yeah, we virtually never find somebody actually carrying a gun into the DMV, but how many see the metal detector and just turn around?
8. Act like I am singlehandedly the entire DMV. You'd be amazed how often people walk into the front door, right walk up to me, and present me with all their various papers and forms, like I personally am the one who issues driver's licenses, license plates, CDL's, various tax permits ect. You walk in the front door of a massive government building, into a huge lobby, and less than 10 feet from the entrance there is a big metal detector and a uniformed police officer standing next to it, and you assume he's the person you talk to about renewing your car registration, who can look up your records and just hand you licenses and plates and such?
However, the task I've come to hate the most is manning the metal detector checkpoint at one certain building.
(Technically I hate working at the morgue even more, but that's something I have to do much more rarely, I end up working the metal detector at least 1 day a week).
Our state government has a handful of public buildings that have full metal detector checkpoints for all non-government employees. Our state DMV headquarters is one of them.
I hate working there. Let me explain why. For 8 hours, I get people who come in, and have a wide variety of sucky reactions.
1. Immediately acting like it's the airport. We don't care about your bottled water, or your nail files, or anything like that. I'm just there to make sure somebody doesn't bring a gun inside (well, LEO's with credentials can). We get plenty of people every day that the moment they see a metal detector immediately start taking off their sneakers, throwing away their bottles of water, and fishing around for their ID, or saying they'll have to go back to their car and drop stuff off because they have nail clippers in their purse. I'm not with the TSA, folks. I don't even bother to count how many times I tell people they don't need to remove their shoes or throw away beverages every day.
2. Paper doesn't set off a metal detector! I can't believe how many times a day I have to say this. It was 4 times yesterday. Somehow people think that the manilla folder they are carrying with the papers they need to file will set off the metal detector. They ask "will this set it off?" more times than you'd think, or they'll be sure to empty out their pockets of all paper and envelopes before going through the detector.
3. This isn't a secret government conspiracy scanner! Also, at least once a day I get somebody who takes out a huge roll of money and puts it in the tray. It's normally at least a little suspicious why somebody is carrying that much cash, but since people are often going to the DMV to pay fees or taxes or such it actually isn't suspicious there. However, the fact that people feel the need to take paper money out of their pockets bewilders me. I asked somebody last week why he did this. He explained to me that it was so that "the government" couldn't scan the money as he went through and know how much he had, which is also why he doesn't keep any money in banks. It's a simple freaking metal detector, it can't scan for money, and even if it could I know it only has a power cord, no data connection (and it's definitely old enough to predate wi-fi).
4. Ignore the metal detector and keep on walking like it's not there. I get at least one of these a day. This person barges in through the front doors, yammering on a cell phone (often holding a purse with lots of clunky metal fittings). Free hint: cell phones will set off a metal detector every time. I try to get the person's attention as they are approaching the detector, the walk straight through, it sounds an alarm, and I am going to the other side of the detector to stop them from going any further.
Without fail, this person will complain to the person on the other end about something making a loud alarm, and when I stop the person from walking any further, they'll tell the person they are talking to that the "security guard" or "rent a cop" or "mall cop" is being hostile/rude to them by stopping them. Never mind I'm wearing the uniform, badge and insignia of a state government agency, carrying a sidearm (and handcuffs and pepper spray), they just think "rent a cop". When I was a rookie, I used to try to set the record straight by politely letting them know I was a sworn LEO of $Agency and my badge number, but this usually lead to formal complaints against me by these people, since they cared more about complaining about me than learning they were wrong.
It takes a lot of willpower and professionalism to deal with that, let me tell you. They are always in a huff when I make them go back through, and go through proper security screening.
5. "But I work for the government!" That buildings policies are clear, if your badge won't let you in the employee entrance (which is only for DMV employees whose ID badges will let them in), you have to go through the public entrance, which involves going through security. A dozen or more times per day we'll get somebody entering the public entrance, flashing a state government ID badge for a different department, and being offended at having to go through security. If you had unrestricted access to the building, your badge would let you in.
6. This isn't an X-ray machine. Every so often I'll get somebody who refuses to go through the metal detector on the grounds that they don't want to be subjected to lots of radiation. I try to explain that a metal detector doesn't emit lots of radiation, but they'll tell me they know X-ray machines are dangerous, so they don't want to walk through an X-ray machine. This isn't that scanner corridor from the old version of Total Recall.
7. "Do I have to go through that?!?"/"What do I do now?!" I'll get this one a few times a day. Somebody will just walk in the front door, and while standing in the doorway just stand there, stunned and silent for a few seconds, staring at the metal detector before asking if it's optional to go through, or just plain not having any idea what to do. When they find out that they have to go through a checkpoint, they'll either turn around and leave without saying a word, or be completely bewildered and have to be walked through how to go through a metal detector ("Yes, Ma'am, keys will set off a metal detector, please put them in this tray."). I'm going to assume at least some of the people who saw the checkpoint and just left immediately were carrying illegal weapons, so it does it's job. Yeah, we virtually never find somebody actually carrying a gun into the DMV, but how many see the metal detector and just turn around?
8. Act like I am singlehandedly the entire DMV. You'd be amazed how often people walk into the front door, right walk up to me, and present me with all their various papers and forms, like I personally am the one who issues driver's licenses, license plates, CDL's, various tax permits ect. You walk in the front door of a massive government building, into a huge lobby, and less than 10 feet from the entrance there is a big metal detector and a uniformed police officer standing next to it, and you assume he's the person you talk to about renewing your car registration, who can look up your records and just hand you licenses and plates and such?
(I tease of course, you're probably no angel 
)
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