Things We Learn at Work

[Ghel]

-If it's software that you have to have (due to regulations, etc.), it will have more bugs than a roach motel.

-That goes double for government-issued software. (Yes! The Treasury Department issues software to banks to calculate the payout on bonds. We've had more trouble with that software than any other in my 10 years here.)

-If someone sends me an email that should have gone to someone else, and I forward that email to the right person, that person will invariably hit reply, not noticing that they're sending their reply to me instead of the person who originally sent it.

[wagegoth]

- Many people consider deadlines as suggestions, even in law.
- Trying to work out an issue with a psycho coworker will always come back on you.
- The day you decide to show off your new shoes is the day you will have to move inventory/boxes of documents/furniture; something will fall on your foot.
- Corollary: if the new shoes are still stiff, you will have to run a long errand on foot.
- The day you decide to treat yourself to lunch out, one or all of the following will happen: your coworker friend gets busy and can't go; the restaurant you were looking forward to will be closed for the day/remodel/forever; your supervisor will suddenly dump a rush job on you; you'll get to the restaurant and find out you forgot to bring cash; if it's a hot day, the restaurant AC will be broken.
- The day you forget to bring a jacket is the day the weather will suddenly break ten degrees cooler than normal.

-see my sig

[ShadowBall]

Ooo, fun! I don't have a job yet, but these are some fun things I learned when I was still at the call center:

- No matter how well you think you're doing, the boss will always find something to bitch at you about.
- It is perfectly fine to omit important details about the products in order to convince people to buy. Like how they just need to cancel during the trial period in order to not get charged, but we leave out the part where the bill you use to cancel doesn't arrive until after the trial is over.
- Calling your company a bunch of scammers will result in being lectured for quite a while by the boss and will include viewing of the company's BBB page as well as an accompanying explanation as to why their F rating is not a bad thing.
- Complaining about possible workplace harassment by the branch manager to headquarters can get you fired.

And from my freelancing:

- Some people think a dollar an hour is a reasonable rate for freelancing.
- 99 percent of clients run for the hills when I mention a contract and a partial up-front payment.
- The editors will gladly cut an article down significantly without asking or telling you, but will reject the whole thing because you don't put a movie title in quotes.
- People don't like when you say up-front that if they are not willing to pay you more, the quality of your work will match the pay they are offering.
- Using words that are too smart will result in the editor telling you to dumb it down for the general masses.