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Old 12-01-2006, 10:31 PM
thegiraffe's Avatar
thegiraffe thegiraffe is offline
Job Search Ninja!!!
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Central Florida, US
Posts: 416

Haha - gather up all the songstresses (and song...sters?) and make a chorus!

Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.

Proverbs 22:6

Old 12-01-2006, 11:17 PM
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Brighid45 Brighid45 is offline
needlework fiend
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 267

The Customer Suck Chorus . . . I like it. Now all we need is a little rehearsal, some studio time and a good promoter. We can make billions I tells ya, billions!

Great parodies everyone! Gave me the best laugh of the day. Well done!

Old 12-02-2006, 12:41 AM
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ArenaBoy ArenaBoy is offline
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 1,709

Nice Jester, here's my version of It's the Most Craptacular Time, it's short

It's the most craptacular time of the year,
SCs come in droves and put us in fear
A lady wanting every toy for her boy
Us workers foiling some new ploy
An SC wanting something that is out
She yells at us how dare we doubt
It's the most craptacular time of the year
SCs come in droves and put us in fear!!!!
The Grand Galactic Inquisitor hears all and sees all.

Old 12-02-2006, 04:38 AM
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CrazedClerk CrazedClerk is offline
Call Center Monkey
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 695

(to the tune of "silent night")

Closing shift, Closing shift,
angry guy throws a fit.
Why are we sold out of Playstation 3?
no, we don't have a Nintendo Wii.
You're out of luck, it would seem,
bitter and angry and mean.

Yes we're sold out, completely sold out,
no it won't matter, if you scream and pout.
I can not magically make things appear,
now won't you please get the hell out of here?
No we don't have any more,
stuck in the back of our store.

don't cry and sob, you lazy slob,
annoying me while I'm on the job
oh how I wish that I was off you see,
but because you procastinate, it's here I must be.
alll of the good stuff is gone,
you shouldn't have waited so long.

Last edited by CrazedClerk; 12-02-2006 at 04:47 AM.

Old 12-02-2006, 04:41 AM
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DesignFox DesignFox is offline
Hope nothing's missing...
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 990

Those are all great.

I also like the original How doth thou suck post...

I will not shove “it” up my backside. I do not know what “it” is, but in my many years on this earth I have figured out that that particular port hole is best reserved for emergency exit only. -GK

Old 12-02-2006, 07:26 AM
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powerboy powerboy is offline
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,094

That is a good idea about promoting the CD and DVD of The Customers Suck Chorus. Just imaging the video's of the songs, we came up with. Now if we can get every single one of us to sing the songs, that would be awesome. On the videos we can go to every place where we work, and record the SC's in action.

Old 12-02-2006, 02:23 PM
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Gravekeeper Gravekeeper is offline
Content Slut
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: BC
Posts: 2,481

Whenever I get stuck working graveyard on Christmas eve I....well I start writing all my reports in rhyming verse. Like the entire thing, every incident, report, tech issue, etc. So I see your christmas carol and raise you one caller incident written in verse:

(This was an actual call too, I can't make up this kind of stupidity. I wish I was. >< )

Twas the night before Christmas,
and all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring,
Except that friggan mouse.

What the hell did it want?
I thought as I answered the phone,
It was two in the morning!
Of course I should have known.

I guess he just couldn't wait.
Can I get in the early bird?! He asked.
But he was two hours too late.

What do you mean?!
Can't you make an exception?
No I can't. I said.
To a chilly reception.

You can say I called earlier!
Now why would I do that?
Because you're my friend!
Actually, I think you're a prate.

Oh come on! he wailed.
In his aggravating speech.
But despite his ranting,
Time travel was past my reach.

By his 100th plea,
I thought he was done.
But as I went to hang up,
He began one-hundred and one.

It's not midnight yet!
He made one last try
It's two in the morning!
I halplessly cry.

Not here it isn't!
Well where the heck are you?
Peru he informed me.
Oh this was too good to be true.

You have to live in BC,
to purchase a ticket.
You live in Peru,
So I guess you can stick it.

I missed that part, he admitted.
As I danced in my head.
Well I guess I can't buy one.
Nope, go the hell back to bed!

Old 12-02-2006, 03:27 PM
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Becks Becks is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: adding to the male harem
Posts: 9,798

Funny songs. Too bad I'm not clever enough to think of one of my own, and I can't sing.
Unseen but seeing
oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
3rd shift needs love, too
RIP, mo bhrionglóid

Old 12-02-2006, 05:29 PM
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friendofjimmyk friendofjimmyk is offline
Captain Save-a-Ho
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Nebulan, fifth quadrant
Posts: 2,194

WOW. A Customers Suck CD - to raise money to help with this site - brilliant. I can't sing, but I can throw some videos together. I have visions for such a thing!
"I'm still walking, so I'm sure that I can dance!" from Saint of Circumstance - Grateful Dead

Old 12-02-2006, 07:56 PM
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XCashier XCashier is offline
Insert clever title here
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: At my computer
Posts: 6,992

I posted these last year, before the hack.

Jingle Bell Schlock (To the tune of "Jingle Bell Rock")

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell schlock
All the day long, they're playing those songs
Over and over and over again
'Til they drill them into your brain.

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell schlock
The same twenty tunes by boring old loons
Andy Williams and his schmaltzy flair
Through the Muzak air.

Carpenters time, Kenny G time
It sucks my life away
Almost makes me miss the "smooth jazz"
That the boss-man used to play!

Quitting time, thank the Lord, it's time to haul
Racing to the time clock
Clash and Ramones and Pink Floyd's The Wall
Kill the jingle bell,
Kill the jingle bell,
Kill the jingle bell schlock!

Wal-Mart Wonderland (To the tune of "Winter Wonderland")

SCs scream, are you listenin'?
In the lane, spilled drink glistenin'.
A horrible sight, we're in Hell tonight
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland.

Gone away, is my reason.
Here to stay, Christmas Season.
It grates on my brain, and drives me insane
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland.

In the aisle, we can build an end cap
And we'll make it nice and straight and sound.
And when we have finished with the end cap
The SCs and their kiddies smash it down!

Later on, in the break room
We'll complain and plot their doom,
About the SCs, we'll gripe all we please
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland!
I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
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