Twenty-two wrongs don't make a right

[Dadeo]

One of our clients is an association that provides ongoing training for their members to keep their accreditation up to date. They don't have a huge budget so we created a template system for them. All they have to do is give us four things: a powerpoint presentation, a video of them presenting, a cue list, and a set of questions for a quiz at the end. Not that hard, really.

In two years and twenty courses they have never, not once, given us the content the way we need it. I can't count how many times we have sent them specs for the video, formats for the questions and example cue lists.

Today we got two more courses and true to form, they have screwed up everything. The video is unusable (actually it's the audio, they compressed the ever-lovin' shit out of it - sounds like the Cylons from the 80s Battlestar Galactica) The questions are the wrong type and the cue list has gaps in it. The powerpoint is the only salvageable part of it.

In most cases I would just roll with it and let accounting know that there will be overages but they do this every time. And every time we charge overages. And every time they complain. And every time I explain that the price was for us to do the job using elements compliant to the specs provided and because they have, yet again, not provided us with the proper elements we had to spend X hours fixing them.

I know clients are not always reliable and sometimes they mess up but... EVERY TIME!?

What kills me is that their whole profession is predicated on GETTING THINGS RIGHT. There could be serious consequences if they screw things up on the job.

[emax4]

Cylons in a Power Point presentation!?!? That's friggin' awesome!

"PLRRRZE TURN TVRR PRAGE FRVTY FRRR URRV YRRR HURRNDBRRVK" (please turn to page fifty four of your handbook)

[barainga]

- sounds like the Cylons from the 80s Battlestar Galactica)

and so it begins...

[wolfie]

In most cases I would just roll with it and let accounting know that there will be overages but they do this every time. And every time we charge overages. And every time they complain. And every time I explain that the price was for us to do the job using elements compliant to the specs provided and because they have, yet again, not provided us with the proper elements we had to spend X hours fixing them.

I know clients are not always reliable and sometimes they mess up but... EVERY TIME!?

What kills me is that their whole profession is predicated on GETTING THINGS RIGHT. There could be serious consequences if they screw things up on the job.

I'd be tempted to, when the inevitable complaints about the overages come in, remind them that there's an easy way to avoid overages, and that next time your company WILL use it. Cue the next set of out-of-spec material. Instead of spending hours fixing it (and running up an overage they'll complain about), send them a brief note along the lines of "Component A is unusable because it fails to comply with elements X, Y, and Z of the specifications we sent you. We are unable to proceed until you supply us with a replacement which is compliant with the specifications." They send out-of-spec material, and it's known that they'll complain about the cost if your company fixes it? Their project (if it's time-critical, and the reason for the delay is the customer's poor planning, it's not an emergency on your part) is delayed until they send you usable material. Naturally, all promised delivery times need to be of the form "X days after we receive a FULL SET of components meeting the specifications we gave you".

Also, love your title "Twenty-two wrongs don't make a right" - but do twenty-two rimfires make a right-twist rifling?

[Gizmo]

I'd be tempted to, when the inevitable complaints about the overages come in, remind them that there's an easy way to avoid overages, and that next time your company WILL use it. Cue the next set of out-of-spec material. Instead of spending hours fixing it (and running up an overage they'll complain about), send them a brief note along the lines of "Component A is unusable because it fails to comply with elements X, Y, and Z of the specifications we sent you. We are unable to proceed until you supply us with a replacement which is compliant with the specifications." They send out-of-spec material, and it's known that they'll complain about the cost if your company fixes it? Their project (if it's time-critical, and the reason for the delay is the customer's poor planning, it's not an emergency on your part) is delayed until they send you usable material. Naturally, all promised delivery times need to be of the form "X days after we receive a FULL SET of components meeting the specifications we gave you".

Also, love your title "Twenty-two wrongs don't make a right" - but do twenty-two rimfires make a right-twist rifling?

This. Not holding clients to this standard causes problems. I have dealt with a few clients who would cry bloody murder when the company I was working for was the tiniest out of line or late. They would also charge us huge fees for this. At the same time they wouldn't even commit to using their own systems consistently to notify us of issues or will give us shoddy information and late notifications. When we called their notice to our T&C's and their own standards then they would shrug and refuse to fix it or repay the charges they deducted from us.

This was the result of getting away with it for so long that they knew they could and that someone higher than me within my organisation would get scared of upsetting the client and cave.

[Dadeo]

We are unable to proceed until you supply us with a replacement which is compliant with the specifications.

That's exactly what we do. And sometimes we ride that Merry-Go-Round for days.

Which brings me to the (arguably) best part. They replaced the video with an even worse version.

The only part we can "fix" is the cue point list. Usually it's just formatted improperly but it's time consuming to redo.

[Dark Psion]

All this has happened before and will happen again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again.

[Seshat]

"There must be some way out of here."

[Kereminde]

"There must be some way out of here."

It's called "refusal of service" and I really wish more businesses would feel easier about pulling the trigger on it with problem consumers :P (No, not customers, that would presume they actually paid.)

[dalesys]

"There must be some way out of here."

...said the joker to the thief...
...None of them along the line
Know what any of it is worth...

Bob, Jimi, etc.

[Dadeo]

When the receptionist is otherwise occupied it falls to Junior Graphic Artist to answer the phone.
The phone rings and I can only hear our side of the conversation but it goes like this:

TheCompany, how can I help you?
Sure, can I tell him who's calling?
Your name.
Can I tell him your name?
Can I tell him who's calling?

I can see JGA is getting frustrated but is trying to stay cool

I turn to CWJ "I bet you lunch that that's TwentyTwoWrongs"
CWJ: I call bullshit on you. Your on.

Can I tell him who's calling?
Can I tell him your name?
No... Your. Name.
Yes. YOUR name.
Thank you, I'll get him for you.
(After sending the call to AccountGuy) Holy Shit! What the hell is that guy's deal?

Me: Who was it?
JGA: Somebody named TwentyTwoWrongs
CWJ: Shit! How the hell did you know?
Me: Lucky guess, I figured whoever had that much trouble with such a simple request as their own name HAD to be the same guy. Where are we going for lunch?

[Dadeo]

UPDATE

So we just got six more courses in and they've come up with a NEW way to completely disregard the specs. I even managed to get a ways into the job - applying fixes to the fuck-ups I knew were there before I got to a "WT ever-loving F have they done now?" moment, then another, and another, and another. Two courses are - and I use the term in its broadest sense - usable but the others...

I have never, EVER had a client screw their shit up so badly as this one.

[PepperElf]

twenty two times and they still can't get it right?


I've got 99 22 problems but reading a list of instructions ain't one.

[Dadeo]

twenty two times and they still can't get it right?

This batch brings it to 28