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  • U R AT U-NI-VER-SIT-EEE!!!

    This weekend i was part of a large team trying to get 1500 students moved into one student housing site over 2 days, so everybody is rushing, stressed and the place is noisy. Also i don't get paid for this, we weren't even given the same free drinks and lunhes as the "adult" helpers because they were being paid.

    All i needed from people was their name and room number (and letter) i check spellings of pretty much every name and every room letter, P,B,V,D all sound very similiar.

    ME:me
    Girl: quiet 18 year old
    BFH: Bitch From Hell, Mother of girl who decided that she shouldn't have to deal with the likes of me.


    ME: Hi there can i just take your name and room number please?
    Girl: Charlotte bare (pronouced the same as bear, beare, behr, etc)
    ME: can you spell your last name for me please?
    BFH & girl talk over themselves giving me the spelling
    ME: Beare?
    BFH: No we never said two Es lose the extra E! (The extra E i assume to mean the second one, i was wrong but other people during the weekend used the word extra to mean the last letter)
    ME: Sorry, so BEAR?
    BFH: NO! B A R E! U R AT U-NI-VER-SIT-EEE NOW (Actually pronouncing it like that very slowly and deliberatly) U NEED TO LEARN TO SPELL!!!

    At this point the other people around are staring at the outburstand seeing how i was going to respond, i am proud of myself though i just directed any further questions to her daughter.


    Afterwards she became a hot topic of conversation and the top suggestions for my response are as follows

    Lamp her
    U R A BITCH
    Punch her
    Refuse to continue
    I'm dyslexic, i will not stand for you insulting my disability, we have all your contact details for my lawyer
    Smack her

  • #2
    Quoth Legal Eagle View Post
    ME: Sorry, so BEAR?
    BFH: NO! B A R E! U R AT U-NI-VER-SIT-EEE NOW (Actually pronouncing it like that very slowly and deliberatly) U NEED TO LEARN TO SPELL!!!

    <snipity>

    Afterwards she became a hot topic of conversation and the top suggestions for my response are as follows

    Lamp her
    U R A BITCH
    Punch her
    Refuse to continue
    I'm dyslexic, i will not stand for you insulting my disability, we have all your contact details for my lawyer
    Smack her
    1.) While I like option #2, "bitch" has more than four letters in it, and if you let her have it all in one go, she might choke on it seeing how it took her a bloody age to speak-n-spell out "university".
    2.) She's probably not used to the physical stuff, judging by her attitude, and if you looked at her too hard (or anything upwards of that) her remaining four braincells may have temporarily separated, and then you'd be dealing with "You... uh... is... in... uh... use... um... stu... der... bad!" and other such intelligent phrases which can be made of three letter words or less. (Think "the CAT SAT on the MAT. PAT SAT on the CAT. A HAT SAT on PAT..." and so forth.)
    3.) Refusing to continue is pretty easy, but then one of your poor co...help...ers? would have had to deal with her.
    4.) The lawyer threat would never be taken seriously. Clearly this lady has used said threat before and knows deep down just how likely you are to follow through.

    No, I suggest a good old fashioned *JD daydream* until either the lady looks confused, asks what's wrong, or thinks she's won. You then "snap" back to attention and stammer something about a B-E-A-R and hint at blood and guts and BFH and end with a "uh... yeah... no... never mind..." and a JD-esque brain-clearing headshake. Gets 'em every time.
    "I'm not a crazed gunman, dad, I'm an assassin... Well, the difference being one is a job and the other's mental sickness!" -The Sniper

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    • #3
      That poor mother would die if she sent her daughter to the university around here. I've read the college newspaper and I know some of the students. They still can't spell nor proofread nor half of the time form a complete sober sentence.
      You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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      • #4
        Quoth Legal Eagle View Post
        letter)

        BFH: NO! B A R E! U R AT U-NI-VER-SIT-EEE NOW (Actually pronouncing it like that very slowly and deliberatly) U NEED TO LEARN TO SPELL!!!

        Only time someone done that to me, I just said this. I...am...not...stu...pid. If I was you, I would have announced, that I could help the next person
        Under The Moon Paranormal Research
        San Joaquin Valley Paranormal Research

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        • #5
          interesting update.

          After trying to contact this person we find that her name was spelt incorrectly after al.

          The correct spelling: BEARE

          The exact spelling i used the first time around

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          • #6
            Quoth blas87 View Post
            That poor mother would die if she sent her daughter to the university around here. I've read the college newspaper and I know some of the students. They still can't spell nor proofread nor half of the time form a complete sober sentence.
            I know. When I worked at the college newspaper, we'd get papers from some of our sister UW schools. They were birdcage lining compared to our paper.

            Fuck, our school newspaper was better that the newspaper in town here. And that's a Gannett paper.

            (spent 2 years on the staff of said newspaper)

            (won a couple awards at a newspaper convention in the Twin Cities, which I went to more or less to get a cheap trip to the Twin Cities, but if the "press" hat fits....)
            Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

            "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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            • #7
              I like the option of saying, "AND. YOU. ARE. A. GROWN. WOMAN. PLEASE. DO. NOT. ACT. LIKE. A. CHILD."
              Or the age old, "Excuse me?" in a very authritative tone, coupled with a death glare that says, "I mean business, bitch, and I'm not having ANY of your shit!"

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