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So, I'm new to the boards, but I didn't bother heading out over to the newbie section, just because I wanted to share this story while it's fresh in my head. Just to give you a vague idea of who I am, I am a 18 year old male who works for Target doing various things. I have long hair, kind of on the husky side, and my straight.
And 100% comfortable with my sexuality, as you will see.
So, last night I was working late night in the jewelry station, bored out of my mind waiting for my chance to get out of there. Of course, I was still nice enough to greet our 'guests' as they walked in. After a few hours, I'm on auto-mode greeting whomever I lock eyes with. I had the fortunate experience of locking eyes with a guy in a group of males, had to be high school jocks or something like that.
M: "Hello, how are you doing tonight? Can I help you find anything?" (My usual opening line.)
Apparently, they took it as me helping them with the jewelry station, and most of them laughed and ignored me. The tallest one, on the other hand, steered away from the pack to give me a hard time. Thankfully my boredom went away for the full five seconds that they kept me entertained.
G: "Yesss, (An obviously fake lisp.) I'd like to see your lovely plastics you have on display here. (Addressing the cheapo rings that aren't even in the case.)
M: "Why, certainly. (I already have feminine mannerisms to begin with, proclaims my wife, so I can play the gay role quite well.) Lesse, let's try on this big piece of bling we have here."
G: "That's not bling honey, that's PLASTIC."
A few seconds later, and after a few good laughs from myself, as the guy is obviously getting flustered.. He brings up that his birth stone is the.. purple one. [Amethyst, I correct him.]
M: "Well, we have this gorgeous amethyst and gold piece here.."
G: "Don't you think it looks a little dirty?"
M: "Well, if you ask me, it matches your personality."
Guys Friend: (Leaning over so he can whisper, mind you.) "Things are getting raunchy in the jewelry box!"
It was after this they slammed down the ring and the guy walked away, red in the face, muttering about not being gay. I laughed, and the girl working in the register across from me leaned over and asked what I did. I was too amused to talk.
Alas, I won, and I didn't feel like playing anymore. Sadly they returned later that evening with the soul purpose of pestering me. I sent them packing once more. I'm assuming the guy was trying to turn me on.. Or something, by constantly poking his finger into one of the ring holes on the display.
I arched my brow, and asked if he had a passion for inanimate objects, and that if so there was a Lover's Package just down the street.
Again, they retreated.. red in the face once more.
And 100% comfortable with my sexuality, as you will see.
So, last night I was working late night in the jewelry station, bored out of my mind waiting for my chance to get out of there. Of course, I was still nice enough to greet our 'guests' as they walked in. After a few hours, I'm on auto-mode greeting whomever I lock eyes with. I had the fortunate experience of locking eyes with a guy in a group of males, had to be high school jocks or something like that.
M: "Hello, how are you doing tonight? Can I help you find anything?" (My usual opening line.)
Apparently, they took it as me helping them with the jewelry station, and most of them laughed and ignored me. The tallest one, on the other hand, steered away from the pack to give me a hard time. Thankfully my boredom went away for the full five seconds that they kept me entertained.
G: "Yesss, (An obviously fake lisp.) I'd like to see your lovely plastics you have on display here. (Addressing the cheapo rings that aren't even in the case.)
M: "Why, certainly. (I already have feminine mannerisms to begin with, proclaims my wife, so I can play the gay role quite well.) Lesse, let's try on this big piece of bling we have here."
G: "That's not bling honey, that's PLASTIC."
A few seconds later, and after a few good laughs from myself, as the guy is obviously getting flustered.. He brings up that his birth stone is the.. purple one. [Amethyst, I correct him.]
M: "Well, we have this gorgeous amethyst and gold piece here.."
G: "Don't you think it looks a little dirty?"
M: "Well, if you ask me, it matches your personality."
Guys Friend: (Leaning over so he can whisper, mind you.) "Things are getting raunchy in the jewelry box!"
It was after this they slammed down the ring and the guy walked away, red in the face, muttering about not being gay. I laughed, and the girl working in the register across from me leaned over and asked what I did. I was too amused to talk.
Alas, I won, and I didn't feel like playing anymore. Sadly they returned later that evening with the soul purpose of pestering me. I sent them packing once more. I'm assuming the guy was trying to turn me on.. Or something, by constantly poking his finger into one of the ring holes on the display.
I arched my brow, and asked if he had a passion for inanimate objects, and that if so there was a Lover's Package just down the street.
Again, they retreated.. red in the face once more.
You are made of Win. 
This is my 200th post. Go me. ^_^
I AM the evil bastard!
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