Putting the hard in hardware

[TNT]

Two calls from the very same day...

Caller: Whenever I turn my computer on, the monitor shuts off after about two minutes. I know it's not the monitor, so it must be the internet.
Me: How do you know it's not the monitor?
Caller: It's less than a year old.

----

Caller: My internet don't work.
Me: What's happening with it?
Caller: Every time I click on Internet Explorer, I get some strange web pages.
Me: Okay. Tell me exactly what you see.
Caller: I'm clicking on Internet Explorer. Now the whole page goes black. Now there's some writing on it... it says "Dell" in blue letters and there's some other writing... Now the page says "Microsoft Windows XP." There a squiggly line under it with a green thing that moves across. Now it takes me to a page that looks like what I see when I sit down at the computer. Okay, so I click on Internet Explorer... the page goes black again..."
Me: Sorry, but I don't think you're seeing web pages. I think your computer's rebooting.
Caller: ????
Me: Every time you click on something, your computer shuts itself off and then turns itself back on.
Caller: So it's a problem on your end?

[jb17kx]

Oh. My. God.

[BravoOrig]

Hey, in their defense, it worked yesterday, and their computer worked fine before they got the internet, right?

[TNT]

Hey, in their defense, it worked yesterday, and their computer worked fine before they got the internet, right?

We have an extra twist... most of our customers had service when we were still Small Cable. "My computer worked fine before Big Cable took over. It doesn't take a genius to think there might be some connection there."

Yes. Yes it does. The company was sold a year ago. Your computer started having problems today. It probably takes something way beyond genius to connect those two events.

[BravoOrig]

"No sir, it doesn't take a genius, it takes something far below that, it takes YOU!"

In most of the states I talk to, we've been around for atleast a few years. We actually sold all but one town in South Dakota that we serviced, which wasn't much. It was fun telling those customers to call another cable company on the day it switched.

[Dips]

O/T

The thread title reminds me of the store my oldest younger brother worked at...

"The Softwaire Centre: Where we put the "i" in software."

I don't know if that is the world's stupidest slogan, but it's got to be close. They are no longer in business, btw.

"My computer worked fine before Big Cable took over. It doesn't take a genius to think there might be some connection there."

Customers just love to make connections, bless their hearts. But how do they know that it was something your company did and not, for example, the fact that they decided to wear blue pants that morning?

After all, it was working BEFORE they put on the blue pants and now it isn't. Same logic.

[technical.angel]

"The Softwaire Centre: Where we put the "i" in software."

I don't know if that is the world's stupidest slogan, but it's got to be close. They are no longer in business, btw

Is it sad I find that totally hilarious and way cool? I just get a giggle from it!!

[Dips]

Is it sad I find that totally hilarious and way cool?

Not sad at all. Giggling is good, not sad.

[ShortTemperHatesStupidity]

Caller: Whenever I turn my computer on, the monitor shuts off after about two minutes. I know it's not the monitor, so it must be the internet.
Me: How do you know it's not the monitor?
Caller: It's less than a year old.

This might just be the blonde in me, but I don't understand this one... If the monitor is less than a year old, it most likely wouldn't be a problem with it...

[Banrion]

This might just be the blonde in me, but I don't understand this one... If the monitor is less than a year old, it most likely wouldn't be a problem with it...

There are however about a trillion and one things that can make a monitor go wonky before you even consider the internet. In fact, I am not sure it is possible for anything off the internet to cause your monitor to hard power off. It is much more likely to be a loose connection from the monitor power supply to the outlet, or a problem with the video drivers.

[trunks2k]

In fact, I am not sure it is possible for anything off the internet to cause your monitor to hard power off.

What you never heard about the user.system.hardware.monitor.fuckup(completely); PHP command?

[Spiffy McMoron]

Caller: So it's a problem on your end?

Er, kind of. You see, I have to listen to this, and it's caused me to want to punch the telephone. That would be a problem if I broke it.

[ShortTemperHatesStupidity]

There are however about a trillion and one things that can make a monitor go wonky before you even consider the internet. In fact, I am not sure it is possible for anything off the internet to cause your monitor to hard power off. It is much more likely to be a loose connection from the monitor power supply to the outlet, or a problem with the video drivers.

Ahhh... ok... I didn't connect the dots: internet+monitor issues=duh

[Shironu-Akaineko]

Me my monitor turns yellow at random times.
It's less than a year old.
It also seems to be a cable problem but I'm broke and can't get another one.

[Gurndigarn]

Me my monitor turns yellow at random times.
It's less than a year old.
It also seems to be a cable problem but I'm broke and can't get another one.

If you have a friend with a monitor, try plugging the cable into the known good one. That way, you can at least be sure that's where the issue is.

Although, nearly solid yellow? That's odd (assuming you're using a CRT-style monitor), since the thing puts out red, blue, and green, so it's usually going to go to one of those colors. If it's just shading everything yellow, though, you may be losing one of the colors... green, if I recall correctly... which could be either wiring or monitor.