Why I hate Greyhound... Or: Why I'm glad I joined the military.

[Phantomgrift]

Bear with me as this is my first official post outside of the meet'n greet thread, so hear goes.

The last job I worked at prior to joining the Navy was for a Greyhound Bus Line... In and of itself, that wasn't bad. The random idiots I encountered on a daily basis though? Yikes!

On Sexism
Some facts to consider: I am six foot, four and a half inches tall, weighing close to 280 pounds. At the time my shift supervisor was a little elf of a girl, blonde-haired and barely reaching my elbow in height. It's night shift at our station and we are the only two people behind the ticket counter. Enter the lone customer for the evening sauntering up to our desk.
As this took place in 2002, I'm a little fuzzy, but the general scenario played out as follows...

M: My cynical self.
SC: A dapper looking black chap who reeks of "Important Yuppie".
TS: My tiny supervisor.

M: Evenin' welcome to Greyhound.
SC: Good evening (Pointedly eyeing my nametag) Jay (Let it also be known I despise being called "Jay"), I've got X problem involving me trying to con you into a lower ticket fare! Can you help me?
TS: Actually sir, if you'd like, I ca-
SC: (Aruptly cutting her off mid-sentance.) Excuse me little lady, this gentleman and I were talking. (Ignoring her and returning to me) Now then, can you help me?
M: I apologize sir. The only people who are authorized to carry out that transaction are my manager and the shift supervisor.
SC: Well that's okay, just get your manager and he'll sort it out.
M: He had the morning shift and has left for the day.
SC: Oh... No problem, if you're not the supervisor, I'll just talk to him instead.... Where is he?
M: (Putting on my best *Cat-Got-The-Canary* grin while dramatically pointing to my co-worker.) Heh, that'd be HER!
SC: ...

The *Foot-in-Mouth* look on his face was absolutely priceless!
Thankfully he ate humble pie and acted fairly reasonably after that.

On The Most Common Complaint EVER

Day-in, day-out, no matter what, I would invaribly be asked one of the following questions concerning our lobby:

"Do you have change for the soda machine?"
Or
"The machine just ate my money... Can I get a refund?"

My reply was always:
"Sorry, the local transit owns this parking garage and we just rent the space from them. They take care of the vending machines and I have nothing to do with it."

That's when the fun would begin. I have seen outwardly-calm looking people explode into a spittle-spewing RAGE at the apparent audacity of my reply.
"Where's your manager!", "I'm getting my lawyer, I'm going to sue...", "I'll have your job..." and so'forth and so'on.

At which point I would politely inform them they were making a scene and if they did not leave my terminal I was calling the cops. Most usually did.

The irony though? For the few that accepted my reply and just looked bummed that they had lost 1.75$US, I'd point out that the machine was kinda wonky and if they lightly thumped it, their soda would usually drop through.
Pitch a fit though and I'd wave "bu-bye!" as they left before going over to retrieve their now fallen soda for myself.

............
I'll go ahead and conclude for the moment, see what kind of reaction I get. Then I can sally forth and share more wonderful tales of complete idiots!

[Trayol]

First of all
Secondly well played in both stories. It was good that the first guy learned to not speak. And I know to always thump the vending machine.

[Ghengis51]

I have the same issue with vending machines, my job doesn't own them, just rents the space. I feel like such a heel telling someone that they need to call Coke to request a check for $1.25 to be mailed to them. Thumping doesn't work on the pieces of dog poo in our building.

[Broomjockey]

Same deal with vending machines here. We've got one on each floor, and since our guests are short term stays, any time there's a problem with the machine, we hear about it a couple of times, and have to tell people to come back in the morning (It's always the night shift this happens on), because at least the full-time staff have access to a float given to us by Coke.

As for your first story, I love it when people get their attitude thrown back like that. "I was talking to THIS person. Leave me alone!" "That was the only person that can help you, sir." "Oh."

[Samaliel]

The nice thing about vending machines around here, is that there is a number you can call if you have any kind of trouble with it. The not so nice thing is that you'll end up spending more money on your phone call whatever it was that got eaten up by the machine in the first place.

[Phantomgrift]

Indeed.
One lady got pissed, demanding my manager while telling me she was going to come back the next day.
I'm thankful for the leeway I was allowed in handling people at times. It allowed me to point out that by her own admission, she was going to pay nearly three dollars bus fare to go home, contact an expensive lawyer and then pay three more dollars bus fare to return and contest a 1.75 in quarters?
Never saw her again.
And thank you all for the warm reception.

[friendofjimmyk]

welcome!

I like the first story - I just love those instances where the SCs are rude to someone and then find out that they are the only person available to assist them.

[AdminAssistant]

Welcome! We're a fun and friendly (if somewhat insane) group.

Anchors Aweigh, Fair winds and Following seas, and all that jazz.

[depechemodefan]

Pitch a fit though and I'd wave "bu-bye!" as they left before going over to retrieve their now fallen soda for myself.

awesome

also

[hopie144]

That's when the fun would begin. I have seen outwardly-calm looking people explode into a spittle-spewing RAGE at the apparent audacity of my reply.
"Where's your manager!", "I'm getting my lawyer, I'm going to sue...", "I'll have your job..." and so'forth and so'on.!

When I've been told...on numerous occasions, by the way, "I'll have your job," I've always wanted to tell that person, "Would you like me to fax or email you an application?"

That would be SO worth it to just hear their response.

Or tell him/her, "Well I only make $10 an hour, are you sure you want my job?"

[Evil Queen]

HAHAHA! My job owns ONE vending machien and the candy machine. The other two Vending Machines (on the second and third floors) are owned by Coke.

But I still deal with a lot of change mongers.

oh, and welcome!

[tropicsgoddess]

First off, to CS.com! Secondly, way to show those SC's...especially Mr.Sexist Yuppie.

[PepperElf]

you're lucky that thumping the machine works...

where i work, if they catch us hitting a machine they'd go ape-poo on us for destroying company property.

they also claim that's why over half of the machines don't work and have smashed-in change-return buttons (meaning you're S.O.L. if the machine's out of soda). yep, it's all employee damage and nothing to do with the fact that they don't want to spend any money fixing them...

[Phantomgrift]

Yeah, our machines were questionable at best, overpriced at the worst!

Hopefully it's not against board policy to keep my tales of tried-patience here instead of making a new thread every time I'm update.
I figured I'd update further stories...
Honestly, working that Greyhound exposed me to the dregs of humanity.
I still have some problems in the military, but it's less personal customer service and more problems of a red-tape nature- Those are tales for a different time.

For now!


Wait... Pay Money For Something!?

These were routine and usually small incidents. Invaribly someone would decide that the price listed on my computer was obviously not the price listed in their head or better yet, completely free.

M: Yours truly
MVG: Misplaced Valley Girl

MVG slams through the double doors and all but skips up to the ticket counter in her enthusiasm to belt the following in as breathless a rush as you can imagine:
"Hi, I'm trying to get to California and I had a ticket but lost it and now I need a new one and you're cute- Can I have one for free!?" *Insert tooth-exposing smile so wide you could light up a runway here*

M: *Blink* "Um... Thank you, I think. I'll be glad to help you, but I can't give you a ticket unless you pay for it."

---------------------------------

This Greyhound was located in Washington State and though not as bad as Seattle, still had it's fair share of homeless which could lead to some rather unusual and/or entertaining encounters:

M: Obviously
RLH: Rather Lost Homeless/Hobo chap

RLH: *Hands me a 200$ bus pass*
"I..I..I... I want a...a...a... Refund on this T...T...Ticket."
M: *Picks up ticket to inspect... Notices name on ticket printout*
"I'm sorry sir, I can't give you a refund on this ticket- It's not yours."
RLH: "Ye...ye...yes it is! I...I...I bought it yes...yesterday and you'll g...g...give it to me or I...I'll get your m...m...manager"
M: *Shaking my head with a gentle smile*
"No, this is not your ticket... This is the ticket I sold to a gentleman a couple of hours ago who reported his ticket stolen and you ain't him!"

-------------------------------

This also tied in with the local churches who would work with the company to give people in the area tickets for use to wherever they were going. The key note on these tickets though, was they were completely non-refundable or transferable in order to prevent the recipient from trying to cash it in for beer money.

QSC: Questionable Sucky Customer
AC: Amused Cop

The station, thankfully, was completely dead when he walked in and the following took place.

QSC: I want a refund on this ticket. I don't need it anymore.
M: .... Hmmm... Sorry, we cant give refunds on this ticket. The only thing I could do is change it for a different date or time.
QSC: No, you don't understand! I don't need it anymore... You can just give me the money.
M: I apologize sir, but even if I could refund this ticket, the money would just go back to the credit account of Church X.
QSC: Nonono, we don't need to give them anything. It's my ticket, it's my money!
M: Again... I'm sorry, but I can't do that. The computer wont allow me to.
QSC: (The switch is thrown and he goes from mild to nuts... But in an angry nerd fashion... Telling me about his woes, troubles and how I'm against him in part of this vast conspiracy of evil, etc. etc.)
M: Please calm down or I'll have to ask you to leave the terminal.
QSC: NO!
M: "Well, it's either that or I call the cops and have them escort you out"
QSC: "Well you go ahead and call your cops! They'll listen to me and know how you're oppressing me by not giving me my money! You'll call them, but you'll be sorry!"
M: "Uh huh..." (Proceed to dial the station as it was only a couple blocks down the road and we're on good terms with them due to the weirdness that is Greyhound.) "Good afternoon... I've got a fellow here who refuses to leave the station without police escort... Is someone available to come on over?"

I get an affirmative and no more than five minutes later, one of the local police officers I actually know saunters into lobby and up to the counter. No sooner does he get out a "Hi" then the QSC self-rightously starts in:
"Good! Now-"
AM: "You, shut up!" (Turning to me with a polite smile.) "You, now then... Tell me what's going on."

I had to fight to prevent from laughing at the outright indignation and kicked-puppy look that fell over QSC's face. Our local area cops were fairly used to the interesting "aspects" of some of the cities residents and responded accordingly.
In summary, QSC deflated and ended up keeping his ticket to head for parts un-known. Those kinds of calls to the cops were always more entertaining than say, the ones needed when fights broke out in front of the terminal.

Anyhoo, that should do it for now.

[Rapscallion]

Hopefully it's not against board policy to keep my tales of tried-patience here instead of making a new thread every time I'm update.
I figured I'd update further stories...

Not against board policy, though a poster gets better responses with separate threads.

Rapscallion