Ponderisms...

[BookstoreEscapee]

• I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.
• There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.
• Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
• The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
• Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
  Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?
• Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
• All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
• In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal..
• How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
  Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly thingsand drink whatever comes out?'
• If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
• Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
• If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
• Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

[Samaliel]

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things and drink whatever comes out?'

Even more disturbing: what did they have in mind when they did?

[Fryk]

"Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly thingsand drink whatever comes out?'"

On that note, who was the first person to look at a chicken and say "The next big white thing that come out of that thing's ass, I'm eatin'!"?