Wait...whuh?

[Amethyst Hunter]

It appears I have bitten off more than I can chew and gotten more than I bargained for.

When I decided to come back to Florida, it was with the understanding that it would just be for the winter season, which could vary up to about March/April.

I've been talking with my folks lately, and I was getting the impression that they kind of want me to stay down here, mainly because I have Actual Employment. Well, yesterday confirmed it. My dad wants me to think about going back to school for something.

They have some legitimate concerns. Among other things, it'd be expensive to shuttle me back north with all my shit (or even just some shit at a time). Gas alone...even though my car gets great mileage, there's still lodging (even if only for one night) to factor in. A good place (that is, not one that's all nasty-looking and of questionable safety) will run you no less than about 50-100 bucks. It's probably more than that, actually.

Also, my dad has mentioned that he and my mom (though it may be more on his part) are thinking seriously about moving out of our current northern home come next summer. This is a move up from the original projected timeframe of spring-ish 2012.

So...I have a big dilemma on my hands here: what now for me?

Dad has mentioned the possibility of buying a small place down here for me to stay in (he says he's tried contacting the landlady who owns my rental cabin, but has not heard anything about her as far as selling this place). More on this will be looked into when my folks come down to visit sometime next month.

I'm not sure if I want to stay here year-round, much less go to school. I will say that so far, being down here is a little better than it was the first time I did it (in 2006). Schooling...the only advantage I can think of is that it would give me a degree that would make my sorry-ass history look better on the 'ol resume. Problem is, 1) I FAIL at math and there would inevitably be math requirements that nothing short of selling my soul to Satan would make it possible for me to pass, and 2) that costs money that frankly, I'm not sure my family has. (Don't even get me started on the whole buying-a-place thing. My dad's thinking habits...not even Stephen Hawking would be able to explain those, methinks.)

It's nice that my dad would make the offer, but sometimes it's hard to tell with my parents how much storyspinning of theirs is bullshit and what's actually real. (Which I'm sure has contributed to no small amount of my own neuroticism...it's kinda hard to attain a mental equalibrium when one minute things change to This, and then the next they switch over to That.)

Working retail is not what I want to do for however long my life shall be. I love having the money (however meager it may be) but I hate having to do what I do to get it. I am easily bored on a *good* day. I can still do it, it's just that my heart's not in it, you know? But as far as schooling goes, there's just nothing that inspires me enough to want to slog through a year or better of expensive education for a job market that might not be there or have evolved way beyond my skills by the time I did manage to land a degree or certification. (Having ADD which warps my concentration abilities does not help, either.)

And the summers down here...and - hurricane season! Yay! Except not. I just read that they're forecasting at least nine possible hurricanes, about 4 of which might be major storms, for next year's hurricane season (for you non-Floridians, that typically runs from about June to late November). Needless to say, dealing with tornadoes is bad enough (and we get those down here too, just not as vicious as our Midwestern brethren). I'd need a go-to shelter in the event one of those nasties cropped up, because no way would I stick around for a Cat. 3+ storm. I've been down here the same year after Hurricane Charley ripped the Gulf coast a new one. I still have pictures up north of extensive housing damage, including damage done to the plaza where my own workplace sits. Even today, you can still see a few remnants of what that damage did: uprooted trees that were never replaced/hauled away, or a bent pole here or there.

I also miss the Midwest a little bit. Though I'm not fond of the isolated town we're in, I do like the house. I miss my best friend too. And I also want to visit my cat's grave. (I still miss my poor sweet fuzzy kitty. 2010 can fuck off as far as I'm concerned for that reason alone.)

What I do like about being down here is mainly the utter freedom to do as I please and to not have anybody bitching at me for it. I can have the TV on, or not. (My dad has to have it on CONSTANTLY, even on shit shows he doesn't even watch. And what he does watch, leaves a LOT to be desired. Let's just say that I could probably list every single fucking program the History/Military channels have produced on Nazis.) I can buy the foods I like, I can eat what I want when I want (mom hates fish and dad has to eat at certain times, mainly because he's diabetic, which is mainly his fault for ignoring doctors' recommendations and eating a bunch of shit over his lifetime. Dad is also very limiting as to what he'll eat, and not just because he's a picky eater. Meat and potatoes is pretty much it for him). I can decorate any way I want (hellooooo porny fanart ). In short, *I* run this mini-household, and it's my way all the way. Ahhh, dictatorship!

So...I'm not sure what to do here. :/ But I have a feeling that my winter 'vacation' (which, really, isn't anything like a vacation) may last a lot longer than I'd anticipated.

Thoughts?

[Seshat]

While it's nice to allow your parents input into your life, they don't have any right to dictate it.
Oh, sure, they can dictate whether they pay for thing X or not (since their money is theirs); but they can't say 'you must live in Florida because we want to live there later'.

If you want to move out of Florida, then even if you're broke, there are ways. Sell or Freecycle all your stuff except the stuff that will fit comfortably into your car. Move. Buy or Freecycle a minimum of stuff in the new location, and put up with sleeping on a foam mattress on the floor until you can buy a good bed.

Think about what sort of work you would enjoy, and whether formal qualifications are required for it. Even some technical jobs, you can start out as assistant to the whatever. (eg, assistant system administrator).

Then find out where you can do that work. Be aware that even though some positions seem to be location-specific, they may not be. (eg, the obvious place for computer geeks is silicon valley, but geek jobs are everywhere nowadays).

From the list of 'where you can do that work', make a list of places you want to live.

And have fun. Live your own life.

[Jester]

Gas alone...even though my car gets great mileage, there's still lodging (even if only for one night) to factor in. A good place (that is, not one that's all nasty-looking and of questionable safety) will run you no less than about 50-100 bucks. It's probably more than that, actually.

Gas is expensive, yes. But I am going to strongly disagree with you on the lodging. On various road trips, I have stayed at a number of reputable, safe, quality locations and, while not luxurious, they provided me what I needed for my one night's stay. $50-100? My experience was that, if you don't need luxury, most places will run you $50 on the high end. Usually less. Motel 6's number is 1-800-466-8356. Good number to have, for location and rate information. And they are not the only discount chain, either. And of all the Motel 6's I have stayed at, exactly one was of questionable safety....and that was more due to the location than anything specific to the hotel itself.

I just read that they're forecasting at least nine possible hurricanes, about 4 of which might be major storms, for next year's hurricane season (for you non-Floridians, that typically runs from about June to late November).

Stop. Just stop. They always forecast an unrealistic number of storms, and they are very rarely correct I don't need to look far for a perfect example. How about this current year? According to "hurricane experts" Dr. Bill Gray and Dr. Phil Klotzbach of Colorado State University, quoted in the December 20, 2009 St. Petersburg Times: "The 2010 Atlantic season doesn't look good. Anticipate an above-average probability of major hurricane landfall, with 11 to 16 named storms, six to nine hurricanes and as many as five that could become major hurricanes."

While there were a lot of named storms in the Atlantic, if you lived here it was not an issue. A total of two storms made landfall in the U.S., one in Florida, one in Texas. One was a tropical storm (Bonnie in Florida), the other didn't even rank that high, being a tropical depression. Not one single hurricane of any category hit the U.S. in 2010, despite the dire predictions. Very few even threatened the U.S. Living in Key West, we are rather aware of such things, as they affect us not only physically, but economically as well. And while we often think the authorities pull the trigger on evacuations too quickly and too readily, we didn't have much to worry about his year, as there were exactly zero evacuations from the Florida Keys this hurricane season.

Most people I know who actually live here full time put very little stock in the annual predictions of hurricane season, as the vast majority of them are phenomenally wrong. Yes, Florida got beat up in 2004 and 2005. Since then? Nothing to cause you to even pause in your beer-drinking while you watch the Weather Channel.

Let's just say that I could probably list every single fucking program the History/Military channels have produced on Nazis.)

I have probable seen every Nazi program on the History Channel, though I don't really watch the Military Channel.

[Seshat]

Yes - get Jester (and other Floridian's) accounts of realistic expectations on hurricanes and living with them.

Wherever you live on the planet, there's a realistic expectation of disaster. If it's not hurricanes, it's earthquakes. Or fire. Flood. Drought. Tornadoes.

Tornadoes actually throw objects at a higher velocity than hurricanes, so if you want a hurricane shelter, you can get a tornado shelter and you'll be right. (Just be aware that you don't want a basement, you'll be flooded out of it.)

My advice is based on cyclone season in Australia. My understanding is that cyclones, typhoons and hurricanes are the same thing by different names (and spawned from different parts of the world's oceans).

Keep your yard clear of debris. If you have toys or furnishings in the yard, have a space you can store them in when there's a hurricane approaching the coast.

Encourage neighbours to do the same.

Have a space in your home which you'd consider to be tornado-safe. (I say that because you seem to be familiar with tornados.) Be prepared to be in it for a couple of hours - hurricanes have a larger circumference than tornadoes.

DON'T leave the shelter the first time things die down - you may be in the hurricane's eye.

You'll probably use the 'clean the yard' once or twice a year. You may use your 'tornado safe' room once in your lifetime.

Also note, there are building styles which are more cyclone (hurricane) safe than others. If you choose to stay in Florida, you may want to research them.

(check out typhoon and cyclone safe building styles, as well as hurricane safe. The search word differs, the problem is the same.)

[Jester]

Tornadoes actually throw objects at a higher velocity than hurricanes...

Yes, but.

In Florida, hurricanes are the bigger problem. Even when they spawn tornadoes, which they do, they are not the tornadoes of the Midwest, which can be huge monsters. They are much smaller and far less dangerous than those from the Plains. The hurricanes themselves are much more dangerous here. And let me be clear, I am referring only to tornadoes spawned by hurricanes here in Florida....I am in no way downplaying tornadoes in general.

My understanding is that cyclones, typhoons and hurricanes are the same thing by different names (and spawned from different parts of the world's oceans).

You are absolutely correct. The phenomenons themselves are the exact same thing, wherever they are and whatever they are called.

Also note, there are building styles which are more cyclone (hurricane) safe than others.

Just as they build buildings in California that need to be up to earthquake code, they build hurricane-resistant buildings in Florida. That does not mean all buildings here ARE up to that code. There are unscrupulous builders and contractors, many of whom were exposed for their dangerous corner-cutting practices after Hurricane Andrew in 1992, so a little research and intelligent queries are important. And of course mobile homes and trailers are called "Hurricane Fodder" for a reason. Personally, I think that anyone who lives in a trailer in Florida or the Carolinas is certifiable. And this is coming from someone who has never evacuated for a hurricane. It's one thing to ride out a storm. It's another thing entirely to intentionally live in a structure that is just not built for a storm that very well may come along at least once in that structure's lifetime.

[Seshat]

Yes, but. In Florida, hurricanes are the bigger problem.

The only reason I mentioned that tornadoes throw things at a greater velocity is to mention that a tornado-safe shelter is likely to also be hurricane-safe. As in, whether it's a tornado or a hurricane that's throwing that spike at your walls, it won't get through the tornado-safe shelter.

[Jester]

The only reason I mentioned that tornadoes throw things at a greater velocity is to mention that a tornado-safe shelter is likely to also be hurricane-safe. As in, whether it's a tornado or a hurricane that's throwing that spike at your walls, it won't get through the tornado-safe shelter.

Also not necessarily true. As someone else pointed out, many tornado shelters are underground. As there is often flooding associated with hurricanes, this would make many of these tornado shelters insufficient protection against hurricanes.

Beyond that, you are unlikely to find "tornado shelters" in hurricane areas. Those areas will have, not surprisingly, hurricane shelters. Which are designed more specifically for hurricanes, the bane of our existence in the tropics.

Well, that and the French.

[Seshat]

Also not necessarily true. As someone else pointed out, many tornado shelters are underground. As there is often flooding associated with hurricanes, this would make many of these tornado shelters insufficient protection against hurricanes.

That was me.

[42_42_42]

Re: schooling

As far as the math goes, if you explain to the instructor from the beginning and have a tutor from the beginning, it will help alot. Also, you could look into getting tutoring to bring your basic skills up prior to taking the courses. If you have an identified learning disability when it comes to math, there's a good chance you could have modifications to the requirements and/or help from your school, such as free tutoring.

As far as what to study and have a job on the other end, the healthcare industry has a huge variety of jobs, requiring varying skill-sets and amounts of education. I'm not sure what affect the recent legislation will have on the industry job-wise, but I'd say it's most likely a reasonable bet that the demand for healthcare workers is going to increase as the baby boomer generation ages.

[Amethyst Hunter]

As far as the math goes, if you explain to the instructor from the beginning and have a tutor from the beginning, it will help alot.

I had tutors coming out of my ears when I dealt with math in HS/college.

It...did nothing. They could never find a way to explain the crap to me in a way that I could even begin to grasp, and I could never wrap my brain around the concepts they were attempting to explain.

In spite of my ADD, I don't think it's because of any deficiency or disability either. I just plain suck at it. I am so pathetically bad at math it isn't even funny. And I have no desire - none - to ever touch math in any shape way or form in a classroom setting ever again. This is one instance where I am going to be a bad feminist and side with the faulty Barbie that goes "Math is hard!" (For me, it is.)

As this is very likely a major stumbling block in my path to a college degree (it's part of the reason I dropped out of community college back in the late 90s; the other part was a massive depression) on account of nearly every fucking place *requiring* a certain credit amount involving math, and worse, the algebraic level at that, that pretty much kills my chances of school. I refuse to waste money, even if it's other people's money, on something that I know will never work. It'd be like trying to force a fish to be a bird.

My parents are supposed to come visit me by the end of this month. I'm dreading it in a way because I know they - especially my dad - are going to pressure me on this, and whatever answer I give I know they're not going to like. Damned if I do, damned if I don't.

the healthcare industry has a huge variety of jobs, requiring varying skill-sets and amounts of education.

Not a big fan of healthcare on account of my low tolerance for 1) squick-inducing stuff, 2) dealing with people en masse, and 3) blood. (Also healthcare likely requires a certain proficiency in math, so...yeah.)

I hate to say it, but I think I'm skunked as far as life goes.

[Andara Bledin]

Math can be incredibly hard if you don't have an aptitude for it. Even more so if you didn't get proper foundations taught to you when you were young.

I have a friend who would have gone into computer programming but couldn't hack the math requirement, so dropped it to computer graphics, instead.

^-.-^