Considering quitting counseling

[JoitheArtist]

As some of you may remember, I've been going to counseling for about a year now. And I'm thinking of telling my counselor that I want to end our sessions. There's several reasons for it:

1: Financial. Even at their drastically-reduced-because-I-have-a-crappy-paycheck rate of $60 per weekly session, that $240 a month. I really could use that to finish repairing my car and get back on track with paying off my student loans.

2. Counselor is too close to my own age. I have never gotten along easily with my own peer group, as experience has taught me that a high percentage of them are immature morons (present company excepted, naturally! )I think my counselor is no more than 5 years older than me, and it makes it harder for me to take her seriously.

3. Counselor is not a good match for me. I mean, I like her alright. But she's not someone I can really open up to, and in all honesty, it's far to easy for me to deflect her questions. Sure, it's more comfortable that way, but we never really make any progress either. She seems to think that the cure for my depression is complimenting me effusively on everything I do, which simply annoys me. No, my artwork is not spectacular, it is merely mediocre and somewhat interesting. I was trained as an artist--I know the value of my own work, thank you. Paying me compliments that I know i don't deserve only makes me distrust everything else you say. Sigh.

I really would like to learn how to deal with my life better, maybe deal with some old issues that need to be put to rest, but I'm constantly broke, and not doing any better emotionally with the counselor than without one.

So...any advice?

[The Gatekeeper]

Print out this post.
Give it to your councillor.
Ask for a referral to someone else.
If she's truly professional she'll understand.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I agree. A true professional should be able to recognize when the relationship is not working. And if she argues with you or takes it personally, it's all the more evidence that she's not the right fit. Sometimes this sort of thing takes some trial and error before you find the right person (kinda like dating...).

If the money really is an issue, can you cut back to every other week, or once a month?

[Jester]

I agree that you should seek to change counselors, and/or cut back the sessions to conserve money, but bagging them altogether is not, in my opinion, a good idea.

[JoitheArtist]

I should point out that this counselor is not my only option for talking things out. I've been part of a sort of group counseling thing at my church for over three years now, and I'm frequently able to talk to them much more openly than to my counselor. So it's not that I'd be going without outside advice, etc.

[Jester]

Outside advice is not the same thing as professional advice. I know you can recognize that.

[Evan]

Counselors should understand that they are not a good match for all patients, and she should have no problem transferring you to someone else.

That being said, have you checked to see if there are any free or subsidized services in your area you could go to instead?

[ArcticChicken]

I've been part of a sort of group counseling thing at my church for over three years now

There's a reason you started counseling even after being part of the group for two years.

Just because your current counselor isn't the right fit doesn't mean that all counselors are the wrong fit. If I were in your position, I'd try to find a new counselor before I'd seriously think about quitting.

[trailerparkmedic]

I would suggest cutting back your sessions to every other week if you're looking to save money. If your counselor isn't a good fit, then look for another. My first counselor didn't work well with me at all, but the second one I went to was awesome and she helped me with a lot of problems.