Dear Ex-Pain-in-the-Ass

[wordgirl]

For a long time, you were a pain in the ass. My ass, to be specific. You were demanding. Rude. Overbearing. Always trying to get a little bit more out of me, or find some little meaningless thing to argue, and argue, and argue about. Our service is free (and doled out on a limited basis) but you acted as if you were paying a million gold-plated dollars for it each and every time, and I was just sitting at your feet in a bronze bikini waiting for you to tug on my chain so I could spend as much time as it took meeting your myriad demands and endlessly litigating our few and simple rules.

Eventually I learned to tune your bitching out. I stopped taking your phone calls (Caller ID FTW) and would only respond to those parts of your emails that were actual issues, ignoring the lengthy and abusive ranting. I guess the burden of my nonchalance was just too great a burden to bear.

So you composed your magnum opus. To my boss and my boss's boss. In different colors so they could follow the intricacies of how and why I had so cruelly displeased you.

And my boss responded by firing .... you, dear Pain-in-my-Ass. Your persona is no longer grata at my establishment. Your privilege has been revoked. Buh-bye.

Here's the kicker. After I stopped caring, I would have just let you float on. I'd never have blocked you from access to our services, for which you were, certainly, eligible. You would get exactly the same level of service as anyone else. You just wouldn't have gotten the hours and hours you demanded.

But you had to go and try to punish me, huh? How's that working out for you, my EX-Pain-in-the-Ass?

By the way, when my boss says "this decision is final" ... he means it. This knowledge is my parting gift to you.

[Ghel]

Beautiful! I've had several customers I would have loved to do this to!

[Rosco the Iroc]

Ha-zzza!


nanan-na goodby

[Jay 2K Winger]

"Sight in on the target, corporal."
"Adjusting incline by 5 degrees, right by 7 degrees."
"Target locked! Do we have permission to engage?"
"Clearance granted, corporal. Fire when ready."
"Firing!"

BOOM.

PWNZER'd.

[Food Lady]

I have a few regulars at the retail I'd like to say goodbye to.

[Ironclad Alibi]

"Sight in on the target, corporal."
"Adjusting incline by 5 degrees, right by 7 degrees."
"Target locked! Do we have permission to engage?"
"Clearance granted, corporal. Fire when ready."
"Firing!"

BOOM.

PWNZER'd.

I am reminded of this movie scene.

[Pixelated]

You have an excellent boss!

[Marmalady]

That is so sweet I can almost taste it.

Beautiful. Just beautiful.

[wordgirl]

You have an excellent boss!

Pretty much the best I've ever had.

So far, the only response from ExPITA is to fire back that no, I am a mean horrible person and did terrible, terrible things to him. Which he helpfully CC'd to me just to make sure I knew boss was now clued in to my wicked, nasty ol' ways. (Of course, boss has been gleefully forwarding me all correspondence from the get-go).

The sad thing is, ExPITA just doesn't get it. Boss flat-out told him, he's too much trouble. Ex-PITA still doesn't grasp why anyone would say such a thing. And the sadly ironic thing is that his current complaint never would have happened had he not been such an a-hole in the past that I basically cut off communication with him beyond the barest of bare minimums.

Ah well..... or all's well that ends well

[MadMike]

The sad thing is, ExPITA just doesn't get it. Boss flat-out told him, he's too much trouble. Ex-PITA still doesn't grasp why anyone would say such a thing.

Sounds like a few people we've banned from here. Sometimes they'll try to argue that THEY weren't being disrespectful, the moderator they got into it was being disrespectful.

[wordgirl]

Sounds like a few people we've banned from here. Sometimes they'll try to argue that THEY weren't being disrespectful, the moderator they got into it was being disrespectful.

Yep, you know the type.

I was just thinking the other day - actually, as a direct result of exPITA - how much my experience, years ago, as a volunteer mod on two active message boards shaped my work style, and the way I deal with conflict.

It's rare that I identify someone who is undeniably, just more trouble than they are worth and is actively damaging the collective good of the body. But once I do, I make that cut and move on. I may agonize over the wording of a particular "you're fired/banned" letter but that's the last energy they get from me.

In this case (again, ironically) exPITA hadn't tripped that wire. He wasn't damaging the good of the body because I had already dialed his volume way down. Disengaging like that is a skill that I know I acquired during my time in the mod trenches.

[XCashier]

And my boss responded by firing .... you, dear Pain-in-my-Ass. Your persona is no longer grata at my establishment. Your privilege has been revoked. Buh-bye.

Every once in a while, the good guys win. I love these kind of stories.

Your boss rocks!

[wordgirl]

Well, you can't keep a good PITA down.

The latest email missive we've had forwarded is from Boss's Boss's Boss's (stops to count on fingers) Boss.

Who was the recipient of a lengthy screed informing her that xPITA had sent her a giant package via FedEx of "documentation of problems with her staff" and why had she not responded in a timely fashion? Attached were all the documents xPITA apparently included in his dead-tree "dossier" packet, among which were:

*long narratives of (apparently) every interaction between xPITA and myself, liberally larded with falsehoods and fiction (seriously, there was one email exchange which consisted of him asking me if he was due for our service yet and my saying, "no, not until next week." He milked almost 400 words of quivering outrage from that one convo.)
*Copies of the emails themselves, some of which had been doctored to make me and my boss appear far more rude and irrational. Unfortunately for him, in several places he failed to doctor earlier emails in the same chain.
*Three separate manifestos on how our rules were unreasonable (nope), unfair (nope) and inconsistently applied (stee-rike and you're out!). None of them were shorter than 2,000 words.

But fear not! Because nobody - not any of the bosses - actually looked at any of the attachments. B-B-B-Boss's only comment in the message she forwarded to AwesomeBoss and HisBoss was essentially: "I guess you're already dealing with this guy, so here."

If xPita decides to take it further, he's going hit problems. Above our location level (where B-B-B-Boss is in charge) our corporate structure becomes a true labyrinth. Getting to B-B-B-Boss's bosses would require going a few steps up and then several steps sideways. So I'm left to picture xPITA hammering numerous inboxes with his righteous pleas, and never getting close to hitting the email of anyone who might possibly care -- except they won't (care, that is).

[Gerrinson]

And all of this was over a free service? I wish I had that kind of time and energy to spare over things for which I pay good money, let alone receive for free.

[Argabarga]

Ditto, how much has he spent trying to get a free service?

I hope it's a lot.

Please, tell me it's a lot.