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  • Scatter Coupons and other grocery store games

    It's been awhile since I posted, though I continue to lurk. It just got kinda depressing after the initial commiserating angry thrill. But moving past that stage, I have a few pet peeves and stories to share.
    * *
    The rewards card is not the best place to take a moral stand. I don't care if you don't think it's worth it, or if you think it's some corp conspiracy, or if Competitor's card is better. I will not try to persuade you with the shiny purple promise of a brand new card, only to laugh from my secret evil island laboratory lair as you receive little to nothing. (Because all cashiers are really Evil Overlords with private islands and legions of terror). Let me break it down into parts that reveal far more than I ever really cared to know myself.

    Quarters: Much like the elementary school year, the rewards card rewards are broken into quarters. At the end of every quarter, you may wait eagerly by the mailbox for the wondrous packet of treats you've so diligently earned.

    Rebates: For every hundred bucks you spend, you get a dollar back in rebates. I don't know who made it or why, and even though it sounds sucky, it's better than nothing. Since I spend half my money there anyway, I for one will be happy to receive the rebates.

    Gas: Another hundred bucks dealy, only this time you get ten cents off every gallon. And I don't care what Competitor is doing, I use to work for them, and let me tell you, the only reason you might get a better deal from them in the gas rewards regard is that they jack up their prices and pay their employees shit.

    Random Coupons of Happiness: 20-30% off shoes, 2-3 bucks off beauty products, apparel coupons, flower coupons, dairy, school supplies, etc. It was interesting to see the various shoe coupons, because different people had different percentage rates. The more you spend, the higher the rate?

    Corporate Conspiracy to Know What You're Buying, How Often and the Most Effective Way to Slip Subliminal Messages Through the Packaging - ... wait. Wrong list. Cancel that. But you will all be my slaves one day.
    * *

    Write your check while I'm ringing up your groceries. The end price has no mystical influence on the date, your name, what you're buying or where you're buying it from. All of that information is ready and waiting by the time you've entered my line. That way, when I'm done, all you have to do is fill in the price, and we're on our way.

    This is really a minor thing. Some people just hang out, and aren't even price watching or doing anything that could significantly impair their ability to make the transaction faster. They just stand there. Wth.
    **

    Let's play Scatter Coupons!! It almost sounds fun. Except for the part where I pick up every single one of them, even the ones you've stuffed into shoes and package crevices, and place them on the counter in a growing pile, because COUPONS ARE DONE AT THE END. Unless there isn't a barcode, in which case, you should just hand me the whole pile and let me riffle through them. That should be the standard and I don't know why it isn't.

    Thing is, people will throw their coupons everywhere, and then demand in a panicked Sky-is-Falling voice if I saw them, or do I have them, or what happened to their coupons???? And then I point out the pile on the counter in front of them. Yes, yes I did find the coupons you jammed in the bundle of children's socks. Good thinking, socks are a much more secure and cozy place than the sweaty clutching stumps you're calling fingers.
    **

    Wait, wait, you have bags! These are the people who put up all their groceries first, their whole cartload of groceries, and then five or six plastic bags into my checking, their emergency environment protection reactors kick in, and they flail about in a clumsy attempt to shove their cloth bags at me. I will not repack your items. I don't care. Give me your bags at the beginning and save us all this needless suffering.

    Honestly, I kind of like packing the cloth bags. It's like Grocery Tetris. How can we get everything to fit into one bag? A minor distraction from my normal brain-numbing interactions. Maybe it's just a nerdy cashier thing...
    * *

    Your transaction is done. Please step over here and pay now. These are the girls who will talk to each other about how bitchy their friends are, about the miscellaneous celebrity drama on the tabloids, about every random thing on earth that only they find important... and ignore the cashier. I generally find no problem in this, it pains me enough to have to overhear these conversations, let alone be a part of them. Unfortunately, these girls have often not mastered the complicated multitasking abilities necessary for yapping away about nonsense *and* paying for whatever critical item that has brought them out of their sororities.
    * *

    Just in general, the grocery store is not where anyone should be trying to prove their worth or status. Get your items and gtfo.

    So that's what's happening in groceryland. Just the same kinda nonsense as ever. Work friends really help the day go by plus they help keep my sanity intact. After three months, I'm pretty well settled and everything besides my customers is well. Huzzah.
    Last edited by Jory; 11-02-2008, 06:45 PM.

  • #2
    Quoth Jory View Post
    **

    Wait, wait, you have bags! These are the people who put up all their groceries first, their whole cartload of groceries, and then five or six plastic bags into my checking, their emergency environment protection reactors kick in, and they flail about in a clumsy attempt to shove their cloth bags at me. I will not repack your items. I don't care. Give me your bags at the beginning and save us all this needless suffering.

    Honestly, I kind of like packing the cloth bags. It's like Grocery Tetris. How can we get everything to fit into one bag? A minor distraction from my normal brain-numbing interactions. Maybe it's just a nerdy cashier thing...
    * *

    .

    I feel your pain. I have this too, however I do call it Grocery Tetris myself
    The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

    Now queen of USSR-Land...

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    • #3
      Quoth fireheart17 View Post
      I feel your pain. I have this too, however I do call it Grocery Tetris myself
      I call it tetris too!!!!

      Comment


      • #4
        lol, green bags=let's play supermarket tetris
        The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

        Now queen of USSR-Land...

        Comment


        • #5
          Let's play Scatter Coupons!!
          It's like 52-Pickup and Hide-and-Seek all in one!

          Bags. Can I rant for a moment? Thank you. I went to the same supermarket twice in the last 2 days. Yesterday I picked up 2 containers of milk (a 1/2 gallon of skim and a quart of whole) and 2 loaves of bread; all that for my parents. I also got a frozen dinner and a couple random small items for myself. I put my items on the belt and put my cloth bag on top of them, so the cashier could pick it up first. He completely ignored it. He then proceeded to put the two milk containers in one plastic bag, one bread in another plastic bag, then the frozen dinner on top of the bread, and the other bread on top of the milk. Who the hell taught you to bag groceries? I wasn't in the mood to repack everything into my cloth bag, but I did make sure to swap the bread and the frozen dinner before I left. (The other two items were in the bread bag, which was fine because they were small.) Tonight I stopped on the way home to get myself milk and a few other things. There were 2 lanes open when I went to check out (dinner-time-ish on a Sunday so it wasn't busy). I saw the same cashier from last night on the one lane so I went to the other. That guy bagged everything OK - produce together in one bag, milk in another, and boxed items in a third - but then he was left with two small microwaveable bowls of ravioli, which would go fine in with the boxed items. No, he put those in a separate bag all by themselves. Come on, people. That "five items per bag" sign you've got on your bag carousel is meant to be a minimum, not a maximum.

          OK, I'm done. Thanks for listening.
          I don't go in for ancient wisdom
          I don't believe just 'cause ideas are tenacious
          It means that they're worthy - Tim Minchin, "White Wine in the Sun"

          Comment


          • #6
            Ahahaha, I'm so glad I'm not the only one. Grocery tetris = win

            Bookstore:

            On the first dude, it is pretty Nothing ever goes on bread ever. Soft things can go next to bread, but not on. (unless like, marshmallows or something) But with the second dude, it's kinda a judgment call. There've been tons of times when I've put lone little items by themselves, cuz it seemed the quickest, least likely bitchery-inducing solution. Peepz are finicky about their bags o_O it's unreal. Like lose-lose situation no matter what, and it's all guess work. Especially with the green bags, cuz now everyone's cautions are like out the window. People want everything shoved into one bag, meat, cleaning supplies, produce, you name it. Shove it all in. Then there are the peepz who want everything separate, like tradition calls for. But I guess it's all solved with askin. I'll ask my customers what their deal is, if I can put this there, or should things be separate.

            But I cannot even count the times where I've picked up cloth bags, set them aside, and started bagging with plastic. Such a duh, wtf am I doing, moment. Embarrassing, to say the least. XD

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: The Art of Bagging

              The first major challenge of bagging comes from not knowing how the customer would like things bagged. The two extremes are: first, those who are in a hurry or for whatever reasons could care less if every item was tossed into the bag almost at random, and second, those who would prefer everything to be bagged perfectly according to their standards. Then you must factor in the apparent physical strength of the customer (a real issue if most of the shoppers are women and many of the women are older,) be prepared for 'wildcards': e.g. "I want them in six double-bags but I don't want the bags heavy," ready for customer I to squish fourteen pounds of groceries into a burlap sack while asking you to recycle the receipt followed by customer II who wants their four liters of hot soup in individual mini tied off plastic bags inside a paper bag inside a plastic bag while customer III has buried the cloth bags they brought under 113 items, and so forth.
              All that of course assumes you take a certain amount of pride in bagging and want to do a good job. There really is an art to bagging -- plus at my store we have literally 8 different sizes of paper bags and 2 sizes of plastic bags. Another challenge is assessing the best way to protect squishable/crushable items like eggs and most produce from big/heavy items like gallon containers and glass jugs or jars, particularly when the customer requests everything in one bag.
              Last edited by Applerod; 11-03-2008, 11:15 AM.

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              • #8
                Quoth Jory View Post
                But you will all be my slaves one day.


                As long as we get 5 paid days off every week, sign me up.

                Comment


                • #9
                  I like the "grocery tetris" term too! I used to practice something called "grocery Tardis" though, whereby I half-fill a trolley with goods, then take it out to my bicycle and proceed to fit most, if not all of it into the panniers. Without unacceptably squashing anything.

                  Unfortunately the bike with those lovely big panniers got nicked. :-( Also, I now live so close to several decent supermarkets that using the bike for them is overkill. A slight shame as the mandatory weekly mile-and-back was good for exercise. But I still get to fit lots of stuff in my backpack, and then only use the plastic bags for the overflow.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Quoth Jory View Post
                    Wait, wait, you have bags! These are the people who put up all their groceries first, their whole cartload of groceries, and then five or six plastic bags into my checking, their emergency environment protection reactors kick in, and they flail about in a clumsy attempt to shove their cloth bags at me. I will not repack your items. I don't care. Give me your bags at the beginning and save us all this needless suffering.
                    I hate that! Do not bury your bags under your groceries. If it happens, it happens, but don't expect your cashier to rebag everything because you forgot.

                    Along the same lines, now that customers are bringing in their own bags more , the bags are getting more and more nasty. I have to bag in had some seriously toxic bags. Its just gross that we are expected to touch them let alone bag in them.

                    yuck
                    WELCOME

                    Be Nice or I'll Make the Sun Go Away.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Applerod: It makes me happy to see another person who appreciates the complications of bagging to the same extent. All of that, though, I guess is what makes grocery tetris so fun.

                      Batmoody: The worst I've seen so far is bags covered in fur. Which would be fine, were I not allergic to cats. Eeeckkkk... it's limited contact, though, and my allergies are not killer, but it still gives me pause. If people have really disgusting bags, I just can't fathom how they would want their groceries in there...

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth Jory View Post
                        Random Coupons of Happiness: 20-30% off shoes, 2-3 bucks off beauty products, apparel coupons, flower coupons, dairy, school supplies, etc. It was interesting to see the various shoe coupons, because different people had different percentage rates. The more you spend, the higher the rate?
                        That's how the rewards program I'm in seems to work. But they also throw in stuff to tempt us into buying things we never get - like a coupon for a free cupcake.

                        Please help me with the bag issue - because I don't want to be irritating:
                        I have 4 bags I shop with - one wine bag, one huge bag for boxes of cereal and light stuff and two knit bags that are the same size as the plastic ones and I designed to fit on the bag hanger thingys should the cashier wish to do it that way. I put them up first before the groceries. Am I doing this right? Please correct me if I'm not.

                        oh, and I don't do the bag thing for the enviroment in general - I do it for the turtles.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Speaking of bagging, is it horribly sucky of me that sometimes I want to bag it myself? I don't own a car, so I walk the ten blocks to the grocery store. If it can't fit in my backpack and single fabric tote bag, I can't get it home. Sometimes, when I have a lot of stuff, I've just handed the cashier my card at the beginning and said to the bagger, "Do I mind if I just put it in here myself?" I mean, I'm gonna just go to the nearest bench and repack it in my bag anyway, then I have to find your plastic bag recycling bin before heading on my merry way. Is that rude? I'd use the self-checks so as not to bother a bagger, but this store doesn't have them. I've had "sure go ahead" reactions, but I've also had a couple baggers glare at me.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Quoth Jory View Post
                            Grocery Tetris.
                            I love Grocery Tetris. One customer I had told me I should get a job with the Airforce packing planes, due to my 1337 Tetris Skilz.

                            Quoth auntiem View Post
                            Am I doing this right? Please correct me if I'm not.
                            That's absolutely right. The problem is when people put them up after their groceries, and then expect us to repack.

                            Quoth Tikaysha View Post
                            Speaking of bagging, is it horribly sucky of me that sometimes I want to bag it myself?
                            Nope. I guess the ones who glare at you might think you're maligning their bagging skills, so if you care you might say something along the lines of "I'm terribly particular about how my things are packed, and it's easier if I do it myself."
                            The High Priest is an Illusion!

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                            • #15
                              Agreeing with ArcticChicken on this one. I get customers who want to bag it themselves and I'm happy to let them do this as I can screw up the occasional order. It's also correct ettiquette to stick your bags down well before going any further or hand them to the checkout person when they ask for them.
                              The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

                              Now queen of USSR-Land...

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