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" i'm seriously upset that I can't try out my new bong when I get home, the police are coming by to serve me a subpena"
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Last edited by Mr. Security; 11-23-2014, 07:45 AM. -
" 'WTF' doesn't even begin to cover this one.""I am quite confident that I do exist."
"Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The DoctorComment
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"I'm going to need some alcohol for this."This site proves Corey Taylor right. Man really is a "four letter word."
I'm now using my Deviant Art page to post my humor.Comment
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I need this one on a sign at my deskQuoth catcul View Post
When you start at zero, everything's progress.Comment
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"Are you a woman?" "Not anymore......"
"here let me move your pants"I am the commander commando!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Comment
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"Does it every bother you that you had four girls?"
"No, because if I'd had a boy, he would have been a fa**ot. He would have worn pink, frilly dresses and pigtails.""I look at the stars. It's a clear night and the Milky Way seems so near. That's where I'll be going soon. "We are all star stuff." I suddenly remember Delenn's line from Joe's script. Not a bad prospect. I am not afraid. In the meantime, let me close my eyes and sense the beauty around me. And take that breath under the dark sky full of stars. Breathe in. Breathe out. That's all."
-Mira FurlanComment
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"I'll stay right on top of EricKei!""For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
"The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
"Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
"There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
"Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
"Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
"Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - meComment
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"You really should stop hitting your wife's tits with yeast and biscuits and stuff."Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.Comment
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Blame the Guatemalans, it's always the GuatemalansComment
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We do not use the poke and pray method to determine which wires are livePain and suffering are inevitable...misery is optional.Comment
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"Ply her with Jaegermeister, and then tell her you want a 69 in Boston!"Is it Asshole Day or what? - MoonCat
It's ALWAYS Asshole Day. - Jay2KWingerComment
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"I'm going to lunch. But first I have to find out the color of my sexual aura. This is very important and I can't go on break before I find this out."
(Apparently, it was 'Beast with Two Backs Minty Green')Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.Comment
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"I'm sorry, I'm assaulting you with soup.""I am quite confident that I do exist."
"Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The DoctorComment
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