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  • I hate you!

    you..you bulb! You oniony bulb!
    Onions are my newest, most hated veggie. It used to be peas. But peas and I are bffs now...
    Today at my work as an entry level cook, the boss made me peel, mince, and slice these nasties a lot. I'm seriously considering to buy a machine that does it instead. And some how sneak it in. They'd probably think I'm crazy.
    But I had forgotten how hard it is to cut these mofos. It's their juice! Their crazy onion juice! It makes my knife slippery and my hand as well, so I can't cut or grip the onion properly. And then the juice squirts on my skin and makes me smell all oniony. Like them! And of course it mixes with the air and irritates my eyes! And my eyes are super sensitive already! Ughhhhh!
    Boss wasn't happy with my onion skills and she sure showed it. But Idc, I'm too busy showering.
    Sooo... What's your most hated veggie. If it's not onion, why not? And any tips on torturing theses crazy bulbs will help.
    Can't reason with the unreasonable.
    The only thing worse than not getting hired is getting hired.

  • #2
    Favourite veggie is beef. You are what you eat and beefs eat veggies.
    ludo ergo sum

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    • #3
      Make sure you're using a sharp knife. It helps cut down on the tears. If you can refrigerate your onions that helps a lot, but you might not be able to. If your eyes start stinging too badly, go stick your head in the freezer, it will instantly soothe oniony eyes. You could also try wearing swim goggles. They look funny but they work.
      "I try to be curious about everything, even things that don't interest me." -Alex Trebek

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      • #4
        Sharp knives and ice cold onions. I used to dump the bag of onions into a clean dish tub and then dump ice over them, pulling each onion out as I was getting ready to cut it. I also found that chewing strong mint gum helped for some reason.

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        • #5
          Yeah, very cold onions (throw them in the freezer for a few mins if needed) means less gas/fewer tears and makes them a bit easier to handle.
          "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
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          • #6
            This:

            http://freehomedecorhdimages.tk/kitchen-magician/

            You'd have to go to Etsy or eBay to find one but they work great. We had one when they first came out in the 70's and used it constantly. I recently found one on eBay. Love that thing!
            When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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            • #7
              Not a fan of avocados and their....ushiness. I know they're healthy and all but yuck.

              And can we talk about flavors? Green peppers are my enemy.
              A lion however, will only devour your corpse, whereas an SC is not sated until they have destroyed your soul. (Quote per infinitemonkies)

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              • #8
                Speaking of foods I don't like preparing, I would have to say squash. Some kinds are very hard to cut, and I find them hard to peel (though not all need to be peeled). Then I have the worst time scooping out the seeds and stringy membrane. I've used an ice cream scoop and other spoons, but there's always more strings! Finally, what happens if I forget to wear gloves?! Oh right, it dries my hands out, the skin is tight and uncomfortable, and then it flakes off. I've had this happen with various kinds of squash.

                So that's why I don't like cooking with squash. I do like eating it, though.
                Replace anger management with stupidity management.

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                • #9
                  My life hack when chopping onions? Sprinkle a little bit of salt over it. Just a little bit. The salt particles will bind themselves with the acidic "steam" the onion emanates. It may not totally eradicate the tears, but it'll help a lot.
                  A theory states that if anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for, it will be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

                  Another theory states that this has already happened.

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                  • #10
                    Quoth bainsidhe View Post

                    And can we talk about flavors? Green peppers are my enemy.
                    I don't mind green peppers, but tomatoes are basically mushy green peppers to me, and they dominate whatever they're in or on.

                    I like many foods made with tomatoes (but not tomato soup, yuck), but not really tomatoes themselves.
                    Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                    "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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                    • #11
                      Quoth bainsidhe View Post
                      And can we talk about flavors? Green peppers are my enemy.
                      Olives, for me. They're the one food I absolutely can't stand. I can usually cheat myself into eating them if they're, say, in a salad or on a pizza, where there are plenty of other flavors to drown them out. But if I'm pregnant? Forget it. I'll be able to pick up the slightest hint of olive if the flavor hasn't been thoroughly cooked out.

                      There are other flavors I don't really like either, but olives are the biggest deal-breaker.
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                      • #12
                        Jicima....it's like a potato that went wrong...blechhh

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                        • #13
                          Mushrooms. While I adore the flavour, the feel of them squeaking against my teeth as I bite into them can and has made me throw up.
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                          • #14
                            Quoth notalwaysright View Post
                            Speaking of foods I don't like preparing, I would have to say squash.... Then I have the worst time scooping out the seeds and stringy membrane. I've used an ice cream scoop and other spoons, but there's always more strings!
                            Next Halloween, you might want to pick up one of these:



                            I've got something similar and it's been quite useful for cleaning out squash.

                            For cutting up onions, I use something similar to this: http://www.simplygoodstuff.com/chef_express.html Once the lid is on, the fumes don't irritate the eyes.
                            Last edited by XCashier; 02-17-2016, 06:29 PM.
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                            • #15
                              Cut the top and base off the onion. Score along the side shallowly - just deeply enough to cut the outer skins (the dry papery ones), and rip them off starting at the shallow cut. Dump that onion in a tub with water and ice.

                              Repeat until done, or until tub is full enough.

                              Cut prepared onions as desired.

                              If using particularly strong onions, or if particularly sensitive to them, you may need to use the swim goggles-and-gloves ideas.



                              I can't stand the taste of olives, either. And picking them off/out of something doesn't work, I can still taste them.
                              Choko. I CANNOT stand it. It's .. yurk.
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                              2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
                              3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
                              4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.

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