Ten commandments and a bicycle.
One day, the vicar of a small rural parish is approached by Andrew, one of his parishioners.
He says. "Vicar, I was wondering if you could do me a favor. My bike's been stolen, so I was wondering if you could say something about the Ten Commandments in the sermon on Sunday. Maybe the thief will feel guilty and I'll get it back.".
The vicar agrees, and the following sunday's sermon is a blistering fire and brimstone job about God's commandments and the fate of those who don't follow them. When the vicar reaches the seventh commandment, he sees Andrew rush out of the church.
The following week, the vicar decides to pay Andrew a visit. He asks him if he got his bike back. "Oh yes, vicar. It turns out it wasn't stolen after all."
"And, I have to ask, why did you leave church last sunday?"
"Well, vicar... when you got to the seventh commandment, I suddenly remembered where I left it.".
The customer is always right, but this is a public house, and you are a guest.