'Your doors are locked'

[GingerBiscuit]

A bit of background: On thursdays, it is late night opening where I live. Shops are allowed to open longer than the hours they normally do, up to nine or ten in the evening, iif they want to open that long. Where I work currently is not one. We close at 5:30, like we do every day, and 4:30 on sundays.
I open at 9, according to our till clocks, and close at 5:30 according to our till clocks. If your watch says different, tough luck.

As always, my thoughs in italics (minor swearing from here)

IM: Idiot Man
Me: Most beautiful goth girl in the world.

it is 5:32, according to our till clocks. I have closed the tills. The till trays are sat on the counter waiting for me to take them downstairs. The door is locked. Our opening hours are posted on the doors. I am sorting out the full closing procedure, and am nearly finished.

*CRASHclunk*
wtf?
IM: (Looking through door.) Are your doors locked?
Me: No, they're just jammed. Sorry, we're closed.
IM:... Your doors are locked! *shakes for emphasis*
Me: NO SHIT SHERLOCK! Yeah, WE'RE CLOSED!

Did you not understand my very clear 'We're closed' to start with? Did you think I didn't KNOW the doors were locked and they had been locked by magical door-locking pixies? Even if I'm not the one who locked the door, presumably I work there, as I'm stood doing things with our tills, so I know that they're locked, and I know WE'RE CLOSED.

We don't manufacture that

A very cyclical discussion, here. SHe wasn't sucky in and of herself, just a little confused and hoping I could help, which I really couldn't.

OL: Old Lady
Me: Brilliant in every way.

OL: Do you sell essential oils?
Me: Yes, we do. They're right here.
OL: I was given a foot spa for my birthday, do you know which would be suitable?
Me: Well, certain fragrances are especially good for the feet. Tea-tree is soothing for blisters and such... *essential oil spiel*
OL: Yes, but will they be OK for my foot-spa?
Me: Oh, you need to know if they'll damage it?
OL: Yes.
Me: I'm afraid I don't know- we don't manufacture foot-spa's, so I know nothing about them at all.
OL: My last one came with some essential oils but this one didn't. DO you think these oils will be alright?
ME: I really don't know. I wouldn't like to say in case the oilyness damages it.
You're better off asking the manufacturer if it needs special oils or products for it.
OL: It's a scholl one.
Me: I don't know anything about any footspas at all. Sorry.

It went round and round like this for about 20 minutes. I felt a bit sorry for her. I figured it would probably be alright, but didn't want to say that in case it was one of the ones that needs alcohol-extracted plant oils so that they dissipate and don't gum up the machanisms or something. I know nothing, aned cannot help you. Please call someone who can.

[gunsage]

What would've also been funny is after the man ran into the door and you told him you were closed...

GB: "Hang on...okay, they're open now." *Didn't really do anything*
SC: "Okay, I-" *BAM...thunk*
GB: "Did I mention we were closed?"

[GingerBiscuit]

My finace (eeeeeh!) suggested 'No, sir, they will open- just bang your forehead against the wooden bits really hard six or seven times!'

[hinakiba777]

Hahah. I love the fact the guy ran into the door.

On a similar topic. I once ran into the door at a boutique. I called in.
Me- Adorable girl
SBG- Snotty Boutique Guy
NBP- Nice Boutique Person

Me- *runs into door* Excuse me are you closed?
SBG- No
Me- Am I opening the door wrong?
SBG- No
Me- Is there something i can do to get in?
SBG- Yeah
Me- *getting annoyed* Will you tell me?
SBG- Naw
NBP Walks and starts talking quietly to SBG. Finally she rolls her eyes and walks to the door. THere is a loud buzzing noise and the door opens itself
NBP= Sorry about that. He's a bit of a jerk.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

You know, I started laughing at this thread before I even opened it.

Because all I needed to have the entire scenario play out in my head was to read the subject line. I read that line, and knew the whole story before I even read it.

Things sure don't change much place to place. Do they.

[marasbaras]

I was up late one night working on some code at a client's office. Specifically, it was 2:15am ... bars close at 2:00am. So, what comes stumbling by? The guy who wants breakfast.

He pounds on the windows.

Drunk: "Hey, I want food, open up!"
Me: "Sorry, restaurant is next door. And, they're closed."
Drunk: "I just want some breakfast, open up!"

ad nauseum

He ends up begging for some coffee creamer.

I end up calling security who had to forcibly stuff him into a cab.

I hate drunks.

[blas]

Unfortunately, I never got to experience a customer run into the door at the gas station.

While I saw countless people tug tug, stare at me all confused, stare at the door, tug harder and harder, I never saw anyone run into it.

Some came close. Some expected the store to be 24/7, so they NEARLY ran into the door, but caught themselves.

[edible_hat]

You know, I started laughing at this thread before I even opened it.

Because all I needed to have the entire scenario play out in my head was to read the subject line. I read that line, and knew the whole story before I even read it.

Things sure don't change much place to place. Do they.

One place I used to work at had the door in a slightly different part of the front wall from all the other sites in the chain. At least once a day we'd get people banging on the wall where the door is at the other sites, demanding to be let in. And one time I witnessed somebody walk right into that wall (which needless to say didn't open like he was expecting it to).

[BiscuitMunroe]

One place I used to work at had the door in a slightly different part of the front wall from all the other sites in the chain. At least once a day we'd get people banging on the wall where the door is at the other sites, demanding to be let in. And one time I witnessed somebody walk right into that wall (which needless to say didn't open like he was expecting it to).

Oh, my, god! that's just rediculous.

[DesignFox]

<snip> And one time I witnessed somebody walk right into that wall (which needless to say didn't open like he was expecting it to).

That's hysterical. I think I would have to duck behind a counter because I would laugh if I saw that.

People are so damn clueless...

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

I get to see people walk into doors frequently. For some reason people around here struggle with the concepts of "Entrance Only" and "Exit Only."

The past few days, the automatic exit doors haven't been working, forcing people to use the push-bar doors in between the automatic doors. We've put up signs saying "Use middle doors only", but as we all know many people do not read signs and as a result we've had a few people flatten their foreheads against the non-functioning automatic doors.

I get visions of that woman on the Ford commercial--"Door open!" BLAT

[martin]

When I worked at a convenience store people would occasionally run into the doors. We had two doors up front that were both usually open during the day. In the evening or when it got busy we would lock one of the doors to control traffic.

One night there about of 15-20 people decide they all need beer, cigarettes, and chips at the same time, so I quickly run over and lock down the one door, then get back on the register to get through the newly forming line. I look up to see a kid trying to do a beer run with an 18 pack. He runs across the store at full speed from the cooler and WHAM!!! right into the door. 18 pack splits open, beers go everywhere, kid falls down and then crawls/stumbles out of the door to his friends waiting car and they take off. Everyone else in the store is laughing like crazy and helping to pick up cans.

The other thing that happened several times was a car would pull up right in front of the doors about an hour before we closed. Usually it was a couple and they would just sit there chatting away. Eventually at midnight I'd go over and lock the door, the person would see me locking up and run up and start having a fit that they needed to buy something and could I just do them a favor. Sorry dummy, you could have come in any time during the last hour, no sale for you. It was either some dumb people, or more likely some liquor control agents hoping for an after hours beer sale.

[Broomjockey]

Yeaaaah. These stories bring back memories *giggles like a maniac for a while*

I think my fav. though is the people not paying attention to where they were walking, talking to a friend usually. And the way the doors were set up were:
*big pane of glass**double set of doors**small pane of glass* *double double sets of doors**small pane of glass**double set of doors**big pane of glass*

And the number of people who would walk head first into the small panes was ridiculous. And it made a nice, satisfying *THUNK* sound too.