Major Psychotic Fucking Hatreds

[roxtar]

29: people who cruise in the left (passing) lane
30: people who don't use their turn signals
31: people who take their sweet time getting into a turn/exit lane

[siskaren]

31: people who take their sweet time getting into a turn/exit lane

Bonus points if they have to move over 2 or more lanes.

[Geek King]

People who can't merge onto the highway properly at speed on a long on-ramp. Get in front of me, or get thee behind me, but the two of us cannot occupy the same space at the same time outside of some esoteric theories on parallel dimensions.

[TechieGirl87]

People who stand in front of the game case thinking someone is just going to walk over to them when we're usually busy as hell, then turn around and say "I've been waiting here for blah blah blah... " The case isn't going to open magically by you staring at it

[Lady_Foxfire]

34. People who drop straws and/or lids on the floor and don't pick them up.
35. People who take the last of the coffee and don't tell me so I can make some more (bonus points for putting the empty pot back on the burner, which is extremely bad for the pot).
36. People who set a bunch of stuff down in front of my register, and then go back to get more stuff, so I have to take care of other customers with a big pile of other people's stuff in between us.
37. People who come in and ask for a cigarillo, and when asked what kind they want, just stare and go "uuhhh..." for like 5 minutes.
38. People who ask me how much different cigarettes/cigarillos cost, and after I've given them the prices on every cancer stick on the shelf, don't even buy the cheapest one. (not that I care how much they spend, but if they were just going to buy the one they always get, why did they waste my time?)

[KellyHabersham]

39. People who don't use the "place unwanted items here" baskets and put those items on the cart which I'm shelving.

40. People sitting in the middle of the aisle to browse through books, and being oblivious to other customers or staff members wanting/needing to get by.

[Dracalous]

23. People who ask for a charger for their phone and you ask them "what kind of phone do you have?" and their response is to tell you the name of their phone's service provider. Well that's nice but that doesn't tell me what kind of charger you need. Do you have your phone with you? No? Would you recognize the charger if you saw it? No? Well sucks to be you. I can't help you if you don't throw me some type of line

I got in trouble with that one a few weeks ago. A customer was looking for a charger and asked another associate near me where they were. When asked what brand his phone was, he replied "AT&T". My brain-to-mouth filter wasn't working that day, so I blurted out "AT&T doesn't actually build phones." I heard from that other associate later that the customer had wanted to choke slam me.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Good old George Carlin!

15. People who blame the lowly clerks over prices, selection, laws, etc.

We're also blamed for out of stocks, the weather and various world problems as well.

[Sunshine]

People who ask for snuff or rillos by blapping the plexiglas and saying "that one!!!!!!" Like there arent 57463637485 different kinds.

[Cat Herder]

Quoth Tama: George Carlin. Can you email the brownie? :P

I could... but I'm not Gene Roddenberry and therefore haven't been able to figure out how to send ANY sort of food over like that.

But Tama's your CUSTOMERRR!!! It's YOUR JOB to invent Star-Trek-esque transporter technology just to accommodate Tama!

[Cat Herder]

People who leave their trash on the shelves

Boot to the head.

Ask me if I have a game and when I say 'no', they ask 'are you sure?'

Boot to the head.

People who put a higher priced item on a lower priced peg or people who just put the item wherever the fuck they want to

Boot to the head.

People who ask 'do you work here?' when I'm CLEARLY standing BEHIND the counter, wearing my name tag with the STORE NAME on the lanyard around my neck... AND IN THE MIDDLE OF HELPING SOMEONE OR PUTTING A GAME/LAPTOP AWAY IN A LOCKED CASE THAT ONLY EMPLOYEES HAVE KEYS TO!

Boot to the head.

People who will come up to the register and, while I'm in the middle of a conversation, completely interrupt me without saying 'excuse me'

Boot to the head ...

...und so weiter.

[manybellsdown]

25. People who leave their spit cup full of tobacco juice for me to clean up.

Someone doing that at the wrong time may trigger a homicidal rampage. Just saying.

SC

Oh that is SO GROSS!

[Sunshine]

Ive had worse....ive had people hand me their cup. Bleh.

[TechieGirl87]

People who will blame you when the power goes out city wide that affects the store and therefore you aren't able to ring anyone's purchase up. Uh, yeah, here's the thing about computers....

[Dreamstalker]

People who come through the empty cashier lane behind me and expect me to drop the customer I'm with to tell them where XYZ is. Sorry, the customer in front of me gets my attention.

People who load their shopping on the belt and then go to get 'one more thing'. Bonus rage if I've already started scanning stuff, as then I'm not able to take other customers and just have to stand there looking dumb.

Anyone using the following methods to get my attention: Waving, yelling "Hel-LOOOO!" down the aisle, whistling, clicking fingers, or anything other than "excuse me". If you don't know how to ask for help, don't act offended if you don't get any.

People blaming me when one of the self scans locks up. Nine times out of ten it happened because of something YOU did. The times that it does actually break down....what do you expect me to do? My nametag doesn't say [RegCompany]. The only thing I can do is close it down.

People who walk up to an obviously closed register, start trying to scan/unload their stuff, and yell at me/CW when told the lane is closed.