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They prescribe that for pain....

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  • #1

    They prescribe that for pain....

    This one is short and sweet and yet amazingly funny. I'm surprised that i didn't have to mute my phone for this one.

    Me: <opening spiel>

    FC: (funny customer) How are you today Chanlin.

    Me: I'm doing well, and yourself?

    FC: Oh, i've had better days. I'd be alright it if weren't for my damn wisdom tooth giving me so much pain. I swear I'm tellin you I took 2 viagra today and it still hurts like hell...

    Me: Viagra? For pain?

    FC: Yeah, so anyway the reason I'm calling is.....


    Either this guy was pulling my leg, or so out of it he completely missed what he said. I'm going with the former only because he was completely lucid for the rest of the call.
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  • #2
    I dunno... back when my mom cut off the tip of her finger, she sounded pretty lucid for someone high as a kite on Hydrocodine. Not surprizingly, she doesn't remember much.
    Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

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    • #3
      Quoth mae View Post
      a group of "red hat" ladies came in and were having a grand old time until my sister commented to their waitress jovially, "We got quite a brothel going on over there, huh?"

      The waitress laughed and explained what a brothel is. She was incredibly embarrassed, but no one still to this day has any idea what word she was actually TRYING to use in that instance!
      Hahaha! Knowing the "red hat" ladies, I imagine they would probably think that was quite funny. Or incredibly offensive. REally depends on the group. (gee, wonder what organization Joi works for.... )
      "Eventually, everything that you have said becomes everything you will ever say." Eireann

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      • #4
        Two vicodin is what I'd think the customer meant to say lol. Although I haven't a clue why people like those things -- they do nothing for me.

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        • #5
          Quoth JLRodgers View Post
          Two vicodin is what I'd think the customer meant to say lol. Although I haven't a clue why people like those things -- they do nothing for me.
          Some people (me included) have a very high natural tolerance to opiates. Some people (like my sister) are really sensitive to them.

          One person could take a 10mg Vicodin (the highest mg possible) and be completely out of it. Another could take it and not notice a damn thing. You just have to talk to your doctor about it and decide what to do from there.
          <Insert clever signature here>

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          • #6
            Quoth Lingering Grin View Post
            Some people (me included) have a very high natural tolerance to opiates. Some people (like my sister) are really sensitive to them.

            One person could take a 10mg Vicodin (the highest mg possible) and be completely out of it. Another could take it and not notice a damn thing. You just have to talk to your doctor about it and decide what to do from there.
            Yeah... they give me the 5/500 (500mg acetaminophen / 5mg hydrocodone) two tablets and I'm still wondering when it'll take effect. At least I'm not the only one

            Sadly my doctors prescribe it for pain even knowing it doesn't work. To think -- they used to go with codeine, now that (it's the "going thing") They really need to up it to the next level or two with me.



            I'm still laughing about the "Viagra" for pain though.... keep on picturing the doctor laughing saying "it might still hurt, but he probably doesn't care!" lol.

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            • #7
              I've only ever taken opiates once, that was morphine when I had appendicitis, and was waiting (In agony) for my surgery. I don't know how much they shot me up with then... all I know was that I still FELT the pain... but it didn't bother me in the slightest, which was the WEIRDEST damn feeling I have ever experienced.

              During my recovery, whatever dosage of morphine they were giving me didn't do crap, so I asked them to stop giving it to me (Partly because I didn't want any chance of ending up LIKING it). I had to fight with them over it because they insisted I needed it to help me get up and move around. It didn't help that no one told me you should AVOID acidic stuff like apple juice after having surgery, as the anesthetic shuts down your digestive tract, and it takes a bit to start up again. (Anyone who's ever done this knows the result)
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              • #8
                Quoth Polenicus View Post
                I've only ever taken opiates once, that was morphine when I had appendicitis, and was waiting (In agony) for my surgery. I don't know how much they shot me up with then... all I know was that I still FELT the pain... but it didn't bother me in the slightest, which was the WEIRDEST damn feeling I have ever experienced.

                During my recovery, whatever dosage of morphine they were giving me didn't do crap, so I asked them to stop giving it to me (Partly because I didn't want any chance of ending up LIKING it). I had to fight with them over it because they insisted I needed it to help me get up and move around. It didn't help that no one told me you should AVOID acidic stuff like apple juice after having surgery, as the anesthetic shuts down your digestive tract, and it takes a bit to start up again. (Anyone who's ever done this knows the result)

                .. umm Apple Juice isn't that acidic (unless, none of the apple juice I've ever had)... also some acidic stuff (like grapefruit juice), actually INCREASES the affects on opiates... it is possible you just had an adverse reaction. Some people do get VERY bad digestive side effect from opiates... (again, me included )
                <Insert clever signature here>

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                • #9
                  A family friend of mine works for Pfizer and has actually told me about using Viagra for pain. It increases bloodflow which can help with some things. She (yes, she) has taken it for things like a sprained ankle, and claims it works. I don't think any doctor would prescribe it outside its sanctioned use, though, so he probably did mean Vicodin.

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                  • #10
                    Quoth JLRodgers View Post
                    Two vicodin is what I'd think the customer meant to say lol. Although I haven't a clue why people like those things -- they do nothing for me.
                    Vicodin by themselves just deaden pain (pretty much the only thing that barely works for me). Yes, I've actually had opiates type pain killers. Don't do much for me, unless the dosages is enough to get me sleeping.

                    What people like is popping a vicodin and drinking alcohol. That mix is what sends people to la-la-la I'm high.....
                    I've lost my mind ages ago. If you find it, please hide it.

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                    • #11
                      Quoth LostMyMind View Post
                      Vicodin by themselves just deaden pain (pretty much the only thing that barely works for me). Yes, I've actually had opiates type pain killers. Don't do much for me, unless the dosages is enough to get me sleeping.

                      What people like is popping a vicodin and drinking alcohol. That mix is what sends people to la-la-la I'm high.....


                      Actually, it tends to make a lot of people really sick (Like projectile vomiting type of sick). It's also incredibly dangerous and stupid due to the ridiculous amount of Tylenol that is contained in Vicodin. Alcohol + Tylenol = Liver Poison.
                      <Insert clever signature here>

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                      • #12
                        I dont get the red hat refernece,but LOL to the customer, heheee....
                        Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Polenicus View Post
                          I've only ever taken opiates once, that was morphine when I had appendicitis,
                          They did that to me once. they asked right after surgery "you in pain?" I said yes, they injected it. went to sleep for four hours. Repeat 2x (with me saying yes, but not being able to add "something else" before). They asked again and I said "no" -- they were shocked, then I added "something else" then gave me -- regular strength Tylenol! Then I was in pain and couldn't sleep as I'd been asleep/knocked out for like 30 out of the prior 48 hours.

                          Quoth SnarkyPie View Post
                          A family friend of mine works for Pfizer and has actually told me about using Viagra for pain. It increases bloodflow which can help with some things.
                          That's just bizarre. Of course there's a number of meds that have more than one purpose. I'm on some that are normally considered "heart" based meds (beta blockers). It's not -- it's for headaches (I have no heart problems and low blood pressure normally); someone else I know is on it for having vascular problems in their legs/feet.

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                          • #14
                            If it were Viagra, then whatever is hurting should be good and hard right about now.

                            All kidding aside, the person probably meant Vicodin, which will make you high as a Georgia pine. Give me one for my neck and I'm happy for 8 hours.

                            Of course, I may have to pried off the ceiling but at least I won't be hurting.
                            Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                            • #15
                              They gave me hydrocodones after my gallbladder surgery (the morphine I got in the hospital made me really sick *bleh*). I slept. A LOT. The doctor told me some people go to work the day after they had that surgery. I told him at my followup I wanted to meet some of those people, because Mom had to drag me out of bed to eat. It took a couple of days before I felt up to just running errands, and I didn't go back to my apartment until almost a week afterwards.

                              And the pain pills didn't do jack for those lovely 'air pains'. (When you have laproscopic surgery, the doctor fills your body cavity with CO2 to give them more room to work. So they don't accidentally zap your liver or something.) Well, all that air doesn't escape. It just hangs out until it dissipates, which can take about a week. But the air tries to get out. With me, it was my right shoulder. Air, from the inside, was trying to escape through my shoulder, mostly when I would lay down, get up, move suddenly. That's a pain I don't ever want to feel again.
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