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Two illegals get called in from the same lot. Myself and Randy go in for them. I get mine first and start to head out. I notice a Jeep Cherokee pull out and follow me, but I don’t think much of it. I get about 10 spaces down the row until I run into where Randy is loading his car. Due to the narrowness of the aisle, his truck and the car it’s hooked to has it blocked so you can’t even drive a motorcycle through the gap between the front of his truck and cars on the other side, so naturally, I stop.
HONK! Goes the Jeep.
“Yup, horn works” I think
HONK! HONK!
“Yup, still works” I think
HOOOOOONK!
Oh great, someone who thinks the horn actually is useful for something other than just passing yearly safety inspections. Well, I’ll just let him honk his brains out, he probably doesn’t get out of the house much and his mind may just be starved for sensory stimulation.
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNK!
Persistent little bugger isn’t he? At this point, I see him cut a sharp left and pull out around me only to have to slam on the brakes immediately to avoid running into the broadside of Randy’s truck. Randy is clearly outside said truck attaching dollies to the car he’s backed into, his doors are open, you could chuck a cantaloupe straight through the cab of his truck and out the other side, there’s clearly no one in it.
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNK!
Oh yeah, like that’ll work, just like the first 4 times you tried it before, hornmonger. Well, let’s at least try some diplomacy, I mean, it probably won’t work, but hey, protocol says you owe a gentlemanly warning before you let anything fly, be it fists or Tomahawk cruise missiles. I walk over to the car and motion for him to roll the window down.
Me - You know, honking doesn’t make him go any faster
Horn Guy - F off! I want out!
Me - I know, and we’ll be done in about 2 minutes, so no need for the horn
Horn Guy - You f-ers have me blocked! Get the f moving!
Me - Uh, sir, there are two exits, you can just go around to the back one if you don’t want to wait here.
Horn Guy - F you! Get back in your truck and move!
Well, obviously there’s no point in discussing it further so I go back to the truck and just casually lean an elbow on the door and get started on some paperwork, since I can’t move either until Randy’s done.
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOO………..
Yes, the idiot proceeded to LAY on the horn, for 10 seconds, then 15, then 20, soon it’s been a FULL MINUTE he’s had the horn on his Jeep mashed. Now people are leaning out windows and yelling at him to knock it off, he won’t be deterred. He keeps holding it down for another minute. People are threatening to start throwing things and or calling the cops. Horn Man apparently feels that since he’s now put what little of his manhood he has on the line, it would be remiss to stop, so he keeps on going.
Now, the commotion has finally attracted the attention of the person who owned the car that’s being towed, and he comes running out. Too bad he was too slow for Randy who is just popping the last dolly axle up and leaving as the frantic owner made it to the bottom of the fire escape and almost face plants in the snow as Randy disappears out into the street with his car with angry Horn Guy in hot pursuit.
Too bad because if he’d been 10 seconds faster, we would’ve had to do a drop right there, in front of horn man, further blocking him in. And he’d have no one to blame but himself.
My advice buddy? Switch to decaf
HONK! Goes the Jeep.
“Yup, horn works” I think
HONK! HONK!
“Yup, still works” I think
HOOOOOONK!
Oh great, someone who thinks the horn actually is useful for something other than just passing yearly safety inspections. Well, I’ll just let him honk his brains out, he probably doesn’t get out of the house much and his mind may just be starved for sensory stimulation.
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNK!
Persistent little bugger isn’t he? At this point, I see him cut a sharp left and pull out around me only to have to slam on the brakes immediately to avoid running into the broadside of Randy’s truck. Randy is clearly outside said truck attaching dollies to the car he’s backed into, his doors are open, you could chuck a cantaloupe straight through the cab of his truck and out the other side, there’s clearly no one in it.
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNK!
Oh yeah, like that’ll work, just like the first 4 times you tried it before, hornmonger. Well, let’s at least try some diplomacy, I mean, it probably won’t work, but hey, protocol says you owe a gentlemanly warning before you let anything fly, be it fists or Tomahawk cruise missiles. I walk over to the car and motion for him to roll the window down.
Me - You know, honking doesn’t make him go any faster
Horn Guy - F off! I want out!
Me - I know, and we’ll be done in about 2 minutes, so no need for the horn
Horn Guy - You f-ers have me blocked! Get the f moving!
Me - Uh, sir, there are two exits, you can just go around to the back one if you don’t want to wait here.
Horn Guy - F you! Get back in your truck and move!
Well, obviously there’s no point in discussing it further so I go back to the truck and just casually lean an elbow on the door and get started on some paperwork, since I can’t move either until Randy’s done.
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOO………..
Yes, the idiot proceeded to LAY on the horn, for 10 seconds, then 15, then 20, soon it’s been a FULL MINUTE he’s had the horn on his Jeep mashed. Now people are leaning out windows and yelling at him to knock it off, he won’t be deterred. He keeps holding it down for another minute. People are threatening to start throwing things and or calling the cops. Horn Man apparently feels that since he’s now put what little of his manhood he has on the line, it would be remiss to stop, so he keeps on going.
Now, the commotion has finally attracted the attention of the person who owned the car that’s being towed, and he comes running out. Too bad he was too slow for Randy who is just popping the last dolly axle up and leaving as the frantic owner made it to the bottom of the fire escape and almost face plants in the snow as Randy disappears out into the street with his car with angry Horn Guy in hot pursuit.
Too bad because if he’d been 10 seconds faster, we would’ve had to do a drop right there, in front of horn man, further blocking him in. And he’d have no one to blame but himself.
My advice buddy? Switch to decaf
That was great.
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