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Chronicles of a Porn store Vol.2(NSFW)

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  • #46
    Quoth Sliceanddice View Post
    put privite parts or personal area is mush more adult!
    "This is the first time I've seen you look ugly, and that makes me happy!"

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    • #47
      Quoth Salted Grump View Post
      No offense to anyone still in their teens, but I've found that most tend to believe in the three 'I's

      Invincible, Infallible, and Infertile.
      add Immortal to that.
      Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end.

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      • #48
        Quoth Dorath View Post
        There's a company that makes Jesus, crucifix, and Buddha dildos.
        I've seen the glow-in-the-dark Jesus one before.

        That was beyond words.
        Unseen but seeing
        oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
        There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
        3rd shift needs love, too
        RIP, mo bhrionglóid

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        • #49
          Quoth Sliceanddice View Post
          put privite parts or personal area is mush more adult!
          Yeeeeeesssssssssss..... and you point is? I think, what we really need, is MORE colourful terms than hoo-ha. I'll start!

          Best one I've heard is "Fluttering love wallet!" Now, someone beat that!
          Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

          http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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          • #50
            Quoth Broomjockey View Post
            Now, someone beat that!
            Please, BroomJockey. You dropped a perfect straight line there. If you're not careful, someone will pick it up and run off with it!

            Rapscallion

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            • #51
              Well, after reading what JM said....

              *Goes into bathroom, takes a peek at huge shower head, feels a cringe in her girly area, and decides "Oh hell No!"*
              You really need to see a neurologist. - Wagegoth

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              • #52
                Way back in the day when the ex was not the ex, he got the idea that an old electric toothbrush (IIRC it was a Sonicare) would be a good idea O_o

                I think I had to be peeled off the ceiling, not in a good way. Followed by the peeling of paint from the walls as I made up quite a few new swear words.
                "I am quite confident that I do exist."
                "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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                • #53
                  Quoth Broomjockey View Post
                  Yeeeeeesssssssssss..... and you point is? I think, what we really need, is MORE colourful terms than hoo-ha. I'll start!

                  Best one I've heard is "Fluttering love wallet!" Now, someone beat that!
                  Frankly, I'd prefer "Miss Kitty" myself., although I once had a co-worker ask me if I preferred hot dogs or tacos.
                  Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                  • #54
                    Quoth Broomjockey View Post
                    Best one I've heard is "Fluttering love wallet!"
                    I'll have to mention that one at work today.

                    Somehow a conversation came up at work about euphenisms in romance novels. I supplied "manroot" AND "bud of her desire", but I think Broomjockey wins.
                    Unseen but seeing
                    oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
                    There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
                    3rd shift needs love, too
                    RIP, mo bhrionglóid

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                    • #55
                      Quoth Dreamstalker View Post
                      Way back in the day when the ex was not the ex, he got the idea that an old electric toothbrush (IIRC it was a Sonicare) would be a good idea O_o
                      Dreamstalker, you have my sympathy

                      Hard plastic, possibly with an added bonus of a pinching mechanism* (depending on age) at a speed of around 30,000 brush head movements per minute? Now thats just plain silly

                      *All sonicare toothbrushes have an arc of movement rather than just left right, think of a bracket shape ( where the bristles are moving up and down the outside of the curve (whilst facing outwards). The older models had a platic plate behind the moving part of the head so you had a gap that got bigger/smaller at a stupidly fast rate and once these things get going they don't stop for anything (even through its all powered by magnets try and hold the head still by hand, its impossible)
                      A PSA, if I may, as well as another.

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                      • #56
                        Yes, I checked her Id as she came in the door :P

                        As for the use of the words hoo ha, I was trying to keep it pg13 :P

                        I have a list of terms left over from a health education class assignment that is around three pages long of metaphors for sex. Some of my favorites were...

                        Putting tab A into slot B
                        Putting the cranny axe in the gut locker (I just assume it's a UK thing)

                        I snuck some wow references in there like
                        "Taking a trip to the deep-run tram"
                        "Sight see'ing in Goldshire"

                        I don't think he got them, then again you wouldn't if you didn't play.
                        Girls do not exist on the intarweb.

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