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Hydrogen oxide will kill someone! Better stick to dihydrogen monoxide. Much safer. Only danger of consumption of it is drowning.
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"I've found that when you want to know the truth about someone, that someone is probably the last person you should ask." - House -
Greenday, hush! Of course I know it's actually dihdrogen monoxide, but that doesn't flow as well linguistically as Hydrogen Oxide Martini. And only a few science nerds have ever corrected me.
Hell, bar geeks might "correct" me by pointing out that a "martini" should be served up, not on the rocks as I always serve the above drink. With a STRAW no less!
"The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is Still A Customer."
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I once answered that question "Oh, I'm not pregnant. Just fat", and stared the person down until they had the good sense to look ashamed and walk away.At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.Comment
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I made that mistake with a friend a couple of years ago, and while she didn't say anything like that to me, I did feel stupid.Quoth badgegirl007 View Post
She had called me to let me know she was going to be at one of the local bars, and asked me to come out and see her and her new boyfriend. I hadn't seen her in over a year, and when I got there, her belly was a bit bigger and rounder than it had been the last time I saw her. I told her, "I was going to ask what you've been up to, but I can already see the answer!"
She told me, "I'm not pregnant! I just got fat!"
Yeah, I felt about two inches tall after that. She didn't hold it against me, but still...
Sometimes life is altered.
Break from the ropes your hands are tied.
Uneasy with confrontation.
Won't turn out right. Can't turn out rightComment
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<sniffs>Quoth Jester View Post
You know better, Jester. Ethanol makes a lousy cocktail when combined with the cocktail of drugs (prescription) floating around in my system.Seshat's self-help guide:
1. Would you rather be right, or get the result you want?
2. If you're consistently getting results you don't want, change what you do.
3. Deal with the situation you have now, however it occurred.
4. Accept the consequences of your decisions.
"All I want is a pretty girl, a decent meal, and the right to shoot lightning at fools." - Anders, Dragon Age.Comment
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It's a joke. I know hydrogen oxide isn't water. But it SOUNDS cool, and that's all I'm going for.
"The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is Still A Customer."
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The last few days I've had tramadol, fentanyl, and morphine floating through my system (sometimes all at once). Jester was STILL trying to convince me that alcohol would mix fantastically with all that. Maybe if my object was to render myself unconscious, it would have been...Quoth Seshat View Post
Today I'm down to just the tramadol. A beer might be in order.At the conclusion of an Irish wedding, the priest said "Everybody please hug the person who has made your life worth living. The bartender was nearly crushed to death.Comment
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This happens to me a few times a year, when I'm retaining water. I absolutely hate it. Whose business is it what I have going on in my pelvis?"Is it hot in here to you? It's very warm, isn't it?"--Nero, probablyComment
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Greenday, there are other serious dangers associated with consumption of dihydrogen monoxide.Quoth Greenday View PostAny fool can piss on the floor. It takes a talented SC to shit on the ceiling.Comment
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